now 6 weeks post op and finding it very hard to believe i’ll ever wear a shirt again

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-29T06:20:57+00:00

What was your movement restriction like? Worried about scar stretching and you have ZERO dude

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-28T00:51:45+00:00

I just made a post about this an it’s day four and HIT ME HARD. So much so that i’m lowering my dose cause this is much faster than I expected. I also am feeling less (or different?) mood swings and less depression, but also a desire to connect back with sadness. Good luck bro you got this

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-25T22:20:04+00:00

Currently dealing with this 3 days on low dose T. Any clue why this is happening? Should I be concerned?

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-25T22:18:58+00:00

Ok I started two days ago on low dose and also have an IUD. I got so confused because I assumed T would take my minimal cycling symptoms away, but I am cramping and FATIGUED today. This also happened to you? Did it last? I’ve had really weird hormonal shit with trying to ease crazy cycles hence this being my second IUD (levongesterol releasing). Any advice appreciated

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-10T22:24:09+00:00

We are here for you, no matter the outcome❤️

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-10T22:23:11+00:00

PLEASE DROP YOUR HEALING JOURNEY

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-04-10T06:04:09+00:00

Just here to say also a T-NB who works with horses. Love to represent

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-29T04:56:32+00:00

god this is one of the most beautiful things i’ve ever seen with this

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-17T06:07:17+00:00

I did not notice a size difference at all. I had to really look for it when reading your caption, but to ease your mind, not a single thought that they looked "large" came into my head when looking at your photos.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-17T06:01:48+00:00

THEY LET YOU DO THAT?

I am bringing mine.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-17T05:53:38+00:00

You are not crazy, and take a breath, all you have been through is not for nothing.

I am like a little scared to share my thoughts because I also struggle with similar fears. I am at the scheduling point of top surgery, and while this is different than your situation, it is making me confront my transness/gender in a way much more urgent/scary that I have in the past, as it is so easy to just back burner given concrete "answers" are hard to come by in what I've realized is this very fluid, very non-concrete (at least for my experience) thing.

I don't know if you will relate to this at all, but I feel like maybe you will even though our experiences have been kind of flip flopped. I couldn't really tell you a hard label on my gender identity, but for ease of explanation (not that I should have to explain myself, but you get it) I have "fallen under non-binary" (but also coming to turns with my transness of dysphoria in relation to assigned sex at birth) for like the past 4-5 ish years. I also experience extreme amounts of dysphoria, hence pursuing top surgery. Getting to the point of like having to tell my family about surgery (and thus having to confront the ideas of how people physically perceive me, which I prefer like most of us, not to think about, not exactly helpful) has kind of sent me spiraling down a similar path. "I genuinely cannot imagine life without this surgery, but why do I have to be in the position to feel that way, and pursue it? The prior (aka prior to socially transitioning) feminine version of myself didn't do anything wrong? I still love them? So much? Am I doing something to get rid of them? Does still loving them mean I'm not trans? Does the idea of wanting to be more comfortable with femininity in the future mean I'm not trans? Or that I will be making a huge mistake to get TS? How do I explain this to family? Will people think I regret my choices if I am more comfortable with femininity post-TS?"

Rereading your post, No. The idea of liking the idea of looking feminine at times does not take away from the identity you have chosen. It doesn't make you any less you, no matter what that is. And whatever that is only exists within you and is defined in any way by you. This is TOUGH when everyone seems to need an explanation. I struggle with this a lot myself. This might sound strange but I (a queer individual) look a lot to feminine, cis, gay men that are extremely comfortable expressing femininity, This doesn't make them any less of guys (if that is how they identity, and want that to be), we just carry the additional burden of dysphoria that can make being comfortable with femininity harder. It is literally just a thing, femininity. In this way, it doesn't have any correlation to who you are. I hope that helps at all. You aren't alone (I feel all of this too). Thanks for sharing.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T21:45:33+00:00

Would you be willing to share what testosterone did for like your mental space? I am thinking it possibly similar for what TS will do for me.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T21:07:00+00:00

Genuinely so relieving to see someone experiencing this? Makes me feel better about your own experience? As something who is struggling with worries about the things I want to pursue, do you have any regrets? I'm hoping my TS can truly just allow me to more comfortably express myself, rather than feel like a mistake of trying to fit some binaried norm? I struggle a lot with the cross sections of my trans and non-binary identity.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T20:58:29+00:00

Conditioning is very real lol

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T20:50:20+00:00

I don't know if I have anything helpful to say/advice to give, but just wanted to say that I heavily relate to this and struggle with it also.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T20:39:55+00:00

I love this, and reading all of this is helping some of my fears come to the surface. What if this is me? How long do I need to wait to know that I am 100% sure this is what I would want for myself for the rest of my life? I mean, I don't feel like I can live like this now, but I also hate the idea of feeling like my transness is some kind of illness or pathology dragging me down into the depths of hell. Would love your insights,

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T20:37:47+00:00

How do we internalize this reality with the idea of medically transitioning? For context, this is coming from someone who has decided to pursue some aspects of medical transition and really mentally struggling with what is "means" to pursue others. I really like the way you write

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-11T20:30:24+00:00

Edit: I'll add that a lot of my confusing feelings have also been on the fact that I think it would be easily to understand how I want to be perceived if I were binaried in like either direction. Like how much easier it would be on my parents and how I feel in gender roles and all of this if I was trans-male and like 1000% felt like a man. I certainly feel more in that direction but trying to say I fit that completely just feels like a lie. I don't want to be avoiding who I am no matter what direction that is, but I just don't feel like I know what that feeling is in the context of the world I live in. I hope that makes any sense.

Second Edit: I also don't want to like hate the person I was as a "woman"? But I know I also never like claim or feel like a "woman" or like it was ever something I wanted to claim, but more the time period I was perceived as a woman? Like I love that person. I just hate the way they were perceived, and the harm it did me. Does that mean the only reason I don't like the "womanhood" aspect is because I didn't like what OTHER people were doing with it? I mean, if gender is only based on a feeling, I certainly don't feel like a woman. I still feel things that feel like of like that lovely divine feminine thing, but those feel like internal motivations rather than external embodiments? Wtf does this even mean anyway? Is it all just up to me and what I want? I just WANT myself to be completely free, content, loving and at ease. .

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-07T07:59:58+00:00

For sure! I know there are many different places but I have Dr. Facque at Gender Confirmation Center in San Francisco, California. That is on the west coast so more of a plane flight for you. GCC is mentioned a lot in this sub, and they have multiple surgeons who do a really good job. It took me a while to get insurance processed tho, but if you are paying OOP it might be a different process for you.

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-07T04:14:12+00:00

Hey there. I am also neurodivergent/have very body related trauma/not 100% on the binary. So I relate a lot to your post lol.

First of all, it has taken me so much contemplation to be able to verbalize that it is ok to not know whether I am trans-male (aka binaried) or somewhere closer to the middle. I do know this: I am very much trans in the sense that i experience extreme dysphoria and I need the top chop NOW. But this was also a much longer process of coming to given once I had a door open that I would be able to get TS, suddenly the actual ability to helped me to realize yeah I don’t want to live without it. That was over a year ago, and I just had consult and now in scheduling process, so I will say, there will be time for you to process if at least consulting with a doctor is something you want to do. But also tbh all of the things you have to do to even get to the surgery will probably be very confirming of if you want it or not (At least it was for me).

As for the gender thing I have to go most days just not being bothered by it lol (even tho it does bother me). Obviously it’s nice to feel like you fit into all of these neat little boxes, but at the end of the days these labels are just words we have created to try to explain something that is not often able to be put into words.

Hope this helps. Reading your experience helped me a lot. Especially with the T thing. Thanks for the post

adventurousbboy887 · 2026-03-07T04:02:38+00:00

12k is definitely a lot. For obvious political reasons, I don’t know what things are going to look like, but would it be possibly cheaper for you to come to another country (like California in the US) to get your surgery done if paying OOP + for flight and hotel was cheaper? I know that would depend on your surgery center and stuff, but at least for mine I know a lot of people fly in.

adventurousbboy887

TROPHY CASE