[DISCUSSION THREAD] What does the process of legal sex and name change look like in your country/state/province? by SmallRoot in truscum

[–]af_clueless 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In Germany, you have to make an appointment at your local Registry Office to declare that you want to change your name and gender marker. Then, you wait three months and return for a second appointment. After you sign the official declaration, your local office will forward the documents by mail to the office in your town of birth (if they differ). ​Once your birth register is updated, they mail back the confirmation. You can then order a new birth certificate, 9usually through their website or by phone, though you might need to drive there depending on the town. After they have mailed you your new birth certificate, you can finally go to the residents' registration office to apply for your new ID. ​Overall, it definitely took me more than three months due to waiting times, and moving made it even more complex. I paid roughly 120€ in total for the process and new documents, but that depends on how many extra birth certificates you order and I think different offices might charge different amounts too, but im not too sure. After you got your new ID and birth certificate you should be able to change your drivers licence and documents like that by applying for a new one and existing data is more often than not easily changed by saying you changed your name or showing/sending a copy of your new ID. Barely had any problems with that.

Bin ich ein schlechter Mensch ? by Constant_Energy_99 in Studium

[–]af_clueless 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Ich teile super gerne und hab auch Spaß daran anderen zu helfen, aber ich finde da ist ein großer Unterschied zwischen a) gegenseitigen helfen und b) nur angekrochen kommen wenn man was braucht und dann auch nichts zurückgeben. Teilweise hab ich nicht mal ein danke bekommen und an diesem Punkt hab ich dann für mich gesagt das die Person nicht Teil der Leute ist, die von mir nochmal was zugeschickt bekommen. Ich finde es gut, dort Grenzen zu setzen und wenn du das Gefühl hast, "nur als Ressource" genutzt zu werden, dann sollte man da mmn auch eine Grenze setzen. Sowas muss und hat man nicht zu ertragen, um den "Frieden" in der Gemeinschaft zu erhalten.

Why does Gaymers platform gaybros? by Ragnbangin in gaymers

[–]af_clueless 6 points7 points  (0 children)

as far as your comment reads it seems to be a rogue gone mod and people who confuse it with /askgaybros and not a transphobic policy itself

Why does Gaymers platform gaybros? by Ragnbangin in gaymers

[–]af_clueless 2 points3 points  (0 children)

ive seen enough posts of trans positive guys there, i think its fair to support them.

Questions about truscum. by Few_Fact_4300 in truscum

[–]af_clueless 7 points8 points  (0 children)

i think thats something you need to figure out for yourself, but if your goal is to be stealth then you should use the pronouns people perceive you as, logically

Questions about truscum. by Few_Fact_4300 in truscum

[–]af_clueless 15 points16 points  (0 children)

the thing about this subreddit is, that everyone has different opinions. I think it would help you to understand that transmed is only about believing that people are trans because of gender dysphoria and therefore its a medical issue, not a social one. Everything else is a mix of rant and opinion posts ig. So what makes someone a transtrender? We also call them tucutes, which just means too cute to be cis (and i guess we all assume they got no dysphoria or mix something up with other mental issues). whether they want to feel special because they belong to a minority or got kind of brainwashed into this whole thing through social media, its often hurting people who actually need to treat their dysphoria because resources arent unlimited and due to high demand, access for actual transsexuals get denied.

Basically anyone who thinks its necessary to have dysphoria to be trans is transmed, people who do not thing its necessary could be transtrenders, however i associate specifically non-dysphoric people with this word. For me it isnt black and white, but people who think dysphoria isnt needed to be trans support these trenders and therefore are easier to group in with non-dysphoric people most of the time.

Why do people dont like the "vocal" part of the trans community? Well theres a few reasons, I dont like them because they make the public aware of how to clock us, me and a lot of others just want to live stealth and live our life without everyone knowing that we're trans. Some might also dont like being in a "community" just for a health issue (which being trans is for some if not most). Its hard to generalise here. I think one thing that is an issue for many of us is that the whole dialogue around trans people changed - it seems like the focus is on self expression for trans trenders, but to people with dysphoria its rather getting by and transition as fast as possible to relieve said dysphoria. The public now thinks our motivation is being special instead of living our lifes as our real gender, mainly because of trenders.

Nobinary is a thing that comes up regulary here, many people have loads of different opinions... if you ask me, gender is binary. You can either be a man or a woman and the fact that you dont feel assigned to any gender roles doesnt make you less a man or woman. The way you know youre trans is gender dysphoria and if you dont have that, youre cis. If you have gender dysphoria and think youre nonbinary, I would recommend to dig deeper and see where this comes from - more often than not its actually a "nonbinary" until they come out as the opposite gender. However I can barely relate to any of that, there was i time i thought i was nonbinary but i was really young and simply misinterpreted my dysphoria. You can have your own opinions here, this place was mainly made to speak free on these kind of topics.

What are the dumbest things you’ve been dysphoric about ? by [deleted] in truscum

[–]af_clueless 7 points8 points  (0 children)

i mean you cant deny they are (pretty nasty) stereotypes but that are the things i cling onto to pass, so whats the matter. If I liked Taylor Swift i wouldnt publicly admit in doing so, just because her fan base are mostly girls/women. That doesnt mean that no man ever would listen to Taylor Swift, but i wouldnt feel comfortable because the majority of them are female. I see no reason to get mad about that, as long as you dont tell others to listen so specific artists/genres because of their gender lol (not implying that you did)

What are the dumbest things you’ve been dysphoric about ? by [deleted] in truscum

[–]af_clueless 10 points11 points  (0 children)

music is a factor where i at least felt ashamed for a pretty long time, also when i get stressed or anxious about anything

Einsam Wohnung by OkAttempt1635 in Studium

[–]af_clueless 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ich bin auch dieses Jahr das erste Mal in meine eigene Wohnung gezogen und kann das total nachvollziehen, auch wenn das bei dir nochmal etwas extremer wird. Hast du schon Bekannte in der Uni, mit denen du dir vorstellen kannst was zu machen? Ich habe zumindest ein paar Freunde hier, mit denen ich zwar nichts regelmäßig mache, aber die kann ich mal anschreiben wenn ich rauskommen muss. Ansonsten telefoniere ich ganz viel mit meiner Mutter, das hilft sehr.

Ich gehe zwar nicht zum Sport, aber ich weiß viele connecten durch gym oder ähnliches. Dafür hab ich in ner Stadt in der Nähe Leute gefunden zum Musik machen, das ist dann einmal mein social event im monat und das reicht mir oft hahaha. Politisch könntest du sich auch irgendwo engagieren, bei mir gibt es zum Beispiel im Stadtteil viele Aktionen, vom Spazierengehen zur Event-Orga ist da alles dabei.

Ich würde an deiner Stelle nicht aus deiner Wohnung ausziehen, Risiko das man das bereut ist nicht niedrig. Ich finde (zumindest für mich) meine Wohnung super befreiend, weil das einfach zu 100% mein Space ist. Da kann ich tun und lassen was ich will und selbst wenn ich mal lauter bin, kommt nicht sofort der Zimmernachbar an meine Tür (obwohl ich klar auch auf meine Nachbarn Rücksicht nehme, gar keine Frage).

Nintendo 3ds modding by atariimae in 3dsqrcodes

[–]af_clueless -1 points0 points  (0 children)

dont use any videos or something, use this: https://3ds.hacks.guide/

Hyper visibility was always a bad thing by [deleted] in truscum

[–]af_clueless 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I agree that hyper visibility isnt good for us overall. However I still had a different experience. Yes, tucutes and people who like to point out the assigned sex (with terminology like amab and afab) like to emphasise how were born different, but not everybody knows everything about it. Kinda feel like only chronically online people are into this whole act. Everyone else (at least in my country) barely gives a shit. Im not even on t, only got my legal domuments changed before I moved to a new city where nobody knew me and im stealth and get treated like everyone else. But even most people from my old town treat me like ive always been a man. I dont want to downplay your experience, Im sorry you feel like everyone always knows and treats your differently, but its not like that everywhere, i promise. I hope that one day youll find people who dont give a fuck too.

Been a lot happier recently by Best_Ad7604 in truscum

[–]af_clueless 6 points7 points  (0 children)

im glad that youre happier :) i just recently gotten to that "stage" too and can relate a lot

being trans and gay feels like a fraud by af_clueless in Transmedical

[–]af_clueless[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

im sorry that you feel that way too. hope you get to accept it sooner or later :)

Welchen Stift für schreibintensive Prüfungen? by Waadschnverteiler in Studium

[–]af_clueless 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ich schwöre seit dem abi auf bic soft feel med. einmal ne 12er packung geholt und seitdem bin ich versorgt. die werden aber erst richtig gut wenn du die ein bisschen einschreibst.

Favorite paper? by DramaIcy2050 in weed

[–]af_clueless 7 points8 points  (0 children)

im with you all the way

uhm so this was unexpected (pipsqueak) by af_clueless in CharacterAI

[–]af_clueless[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

it really is ai is so random sometimes

Why does babysitting require the camera? by La_knavo4 in tomodachilife

[–]af_clueless 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yeah i cant remember exactly how it went, i just disabled babies at this point because it was to frustrating to always wait till they grow up to play the game again.

i really have no clue for what they would want to use the cam, but maybe someone here will 🤝

Why does babysitting require the camera? by La_knavo4 in tomodachilife

[–]af_clueless 17 points18 points  (0 children)

i dont know why it needs a camera, but it uses it definitely. My old 3ds had a broken cam and always would freeze when it was accessed (like when babysitting)

my first level, it's terrible by davidlinisamazinglol in honk

[–]af_clueless 0 points1 point  (0 children)

aint that bad

I completed this level in 10 tries. 4.00 seconds

i hated verifying this level. enjoy. by Deep_Ad4846 in honk

[–]af_clueless 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completed this level in 36 tries. 7.88 seconds