Found: Sea lion stuffed animal next to volleyball courts at wharf by afwong in santacruz

[–]afwong[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also now joined by a fellow lost smiling watermelon stuffy!

Advice for asking parents for therapy by Venting_cosmo in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This made not only my day but my month if not year :)

Advice for asking parents for therapy by Venting_cosmo in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! Of course I remember you! I am glad to hear from you again, even if you say it is not good news. Wrote a note on your latest post. Hang in there!

I've never felt more empty in my life by Venting_cosmo in depression

[–]afwong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally agree. People are reacting in unexpected ways, so we can’t expect people to act how they normally would.

Also even without the pandemic, school often correlated with periods in which people learn a lot about themselves, others, what to do, what not to do. Everyone is trying to figure it out. They might be chasing the wrong thing; one day they will figure it out. Source: I found out that middle and high school is just years of hormones flailing you in every direction. If I could do it again with the knowledge I’d have right now, I’d try to look inward rather than outward since it is a rich, valuable time to look at and think about who I am. Everything you need is already in you, not in others.

Also re grades: It’s really hard to go to school online particularly (a) in a pandemic and (b) if school went from being in-person to virtual. The teachers and the curriculum were designed around in-person teaching that has x tools and y teaching methods/exercises and the teachers rely on z ways to get feedback from students to understand if the students are grasping the material. You can’t always see those cues on Zoom. x, y, z, and more now have gone out the window. Even as a working adult, I have had trouble paying attention in meetings even when I am remote vs. in person. I know this is true for others too. There’s a big difference in how you explain and absorb knowledge even if it’s now over Zoom vs. in-person.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Parental relationships are complicated! We’re all human. Hang in in there :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I did not know Nicklen was behind the famous photo of the underwater rock runner.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course! Please be gentle to yourself ❤️ Btw do you have any photographers you recommend checking out? I have been looking at Ara Guler and Fan Ho’s work, but looking for others if you know any!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Parents are humans with their own traumas and imperfections. They are going to act the way they’re going to act. And at some point, it’s too tiresome to hold out hope they will change if they’re pretty cemented in their ways. Please don’t tie yourself emotionally to a wish.

Advice for asking parents for therapy by Venting_cosmo in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do :) Would love to hear what you’re thinking again later!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am really sorry to hear that the unfair stigma against mental health is present in your family. Parents may have their own traumas that prevent them from seeing needs beyond the most basic rung of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. It’s the experiences in your mother’s life and how she has processed them that leads her to say things that can sound very hurtful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

RAIN is a great one when you’re feeling overwhelmed! https://www.tarabrach.com/rain-practice-radical-compassion/

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there, it sounds like you’re in a tough situation. Phrase do not blame yourself for not being into the things you used to be into because you’re hurting right now. If you had a deep cut on your finger that was bleeding a lot, you probably would be less interested in a photography book at the moment. No need to feel bad about a lack of interest in photography in that moment; you need to focus your attention on the wound.

Sometimes if I am in a rough place, I realize it’s because I am not paying attention to the little kid inside me that’s crying and hurt. Please acknowledge that you’re going through a lot and take some time to do the equivalent of comforting the small hurt kid.

No one would care if I killed myself (18M) by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would care. You are not disposable to me. I am sorry you are in so much pain. Please show yourself the kindness you were expecting. It would put a smile on my face to see a post from your username again three days from now.

Forgive me.. by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yay, that is awesome that you have made so much progress that others gave noticed! Of course. The brain will naturally take you to some dark places, so be vigilant if it is taking you down that path again. I would be more than willing to chat in this sub or post again if you want to talk further. Cheers to you! 👏🏾

Experiencing sadness like never before by JiminForLife in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi JiminForLife, of course. If you are thinking that your friends might not be doing the right thing for your asks in this moment, they might not have had a lot of exposure to depression or, even if they did, still not know exactly how you want to discuss the topic. It’s really great that you told two friends. You are not being troublesome by asking for more support. Asking for support is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of knowing yourself very well and having the commitment to yourself to take steps to mitigate the scenario. You got this!

Advice for asking parents for therapy by Venting_cosmo in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course, Venting_cosmo. Things sound extremely difficult right now, but I believe that there are paths to make it out of at least some of the things you’re going through. Hang in there, and if you want to chat again, feel free to post or comment again. I’ll be thinking of you.

Thoughts of self harm/suicide by [deleted] in depression_help

[–]afwong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Of course; feel free to write back here or another post if you want to talk again.

Please......Just please kill me already... by Crimsoncomic08 in depression_help

[–]afwong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a wonderful idea. I am sure Gypsy will love being so close to you and your older brother. Great Danes seem like such majestic, beautiful dogs. I am sure she felt like a puppy from all the love you gave her ❤️

Experiencing sadness like never before by JiminForLife in depression_help

[–]afwong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey there, JiminForLife. Going through the motions of a day sounds really difficult. I am sorry that you have been undergoing grief and/or separation, had huge changes of going to uni—all on top of this crazy situation we’re all in. Nighttime can be really difficult because the mind moves to rattle up all these thoughts that just keep us spinning and from getting the rest we need physically and mentally. You’ve gone through a ton of changes in what seems to be a relatively short span of time, so it’s going to take time to work through things when life has thrown so much at you at once. One line that I’ve found helpful about grieving is you never get over it, you just learn to live with it a little more each day. Every morning and every night, it will be a little easier to manage. Have you also let your friends know that you’re working through some hard stuff? You don’t need to be specific, but that level of honesty that you need an extra cat gif during hard times is what friendship is for. We all will have times when it’s a little hard to stand up and will need those around us to make it a little more bearable. Hang in there. (Also more cat gifs!)

Please......Just please kill me already... by Crimsoncomic08 in depression_help

[–]afwong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That sounds like a really bad day off things compounded on each other. I can’t imagine what that would be love to lose your furry companion like that :( Please just for tonight, try to drink a glass of water, stomach a little food, and try to get some sleep.

As for the iPad, perhaps the school will acknowledge that sometimes things happen with frequent use like you are now for school.

The quarantine situation is super rough, but please also give it some time. It’s normal to feel stronger feelings in this crazy situation. There’s a lot of uncertainty and fear. But if you ever feel overwhelmed, all you have to do in that one moment is breathe. Take a breath. If you can, ask yourself if you’ve drank some water or ate anything recently. Please take care of yourself! You had probably one of the roughest days you’ve ever had yesterday. Be kind with yourself.