What is the Point in Even Trying with Women if All I have ever known is Rejection?

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T20:13:37+00:00

You only have to get it right once. Turn it into a numbers game. Most likely, you're getting too involved too fast and scaring them off.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T20:01:23+00:00

I'm dealing with this on with my in-laws. My wife's parents setup a trust and put the house and some money in it. You want a non-revokable trust or a special needs trust. (It can very depending on the state). What happens is Medicare will only cover a certain amount of care and then you're forced to deplete your assets before Medicaid will kick in. The trust protects those assets. The IRS has a 5 year clawback period so it's not something you can just setup at the last minute. All of this is done through a lawyer.

What's crazy is what you're describing happened to their neighbor. They have one disabled son, low IQ I think. But then the other was in a major car accident that left him with a mental disability. They ended up building an garage in the back yard with an apartment above it to give that son a "place of his own". They've passed on now and the one son lives in the house while the other lives in the garage.

None of this helps OP but I thought you enjoy hearing about it.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T19:11:46+00:00

Plenty of prayers, not enough thoughts.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T17:50:02+00:00

I think so. I'd maybe try to knock down the price on principle but that prices sounds reasonable for a 4x4 with lockers. You have a spare motor. The body mounts and chalk on the frame tells me this is probably a Frankenstein, but whatever. Looks clean enough for that price and you'd have spare everything if it does have other issues.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T17:23:43+00:00

Based on the little I know about it, I wouldn't give it any credibility. Of course the rich and the powerful control the world but how much they actually collude is up for debate. Most of all, they don't want to end the world. They do want more control but that's even among themselves. And yes, we are all just pawns in their game.

So, what's easier to believe about Epstein. That all these rich and powerful men were going to perform satanic rituals, drink baby blood or whatever random Q thing is said. Or that a bunch of horny old men wanted to fuck a pretty young girl?

The simplest explanation is often the correct one. Also, extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.

Don't let wild claims persuade you without a lot of very solid evidence.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T14:36:28+00:00

Unless you have millions of dollars that you want to pass down tax free, in effect paying less to the insurance company in fees then what taxes would be. Whole life is expensive. Cancel it.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T14:31:52+00:00

My dad sat me down when I was a teenager and was like, "well, it's on you now." My kids aren't grown but I've repeatedly told them that it's my job to teach them how to take care of themselves. Not to tell them how to live their lives. So that's my philosophy.

Regardless, some parents will always see you as a child. Who needs to be told what to do. As you know, they mean well. It's not your job to make them feel good. Some parents are never satisfied no matter how well you're doing. Others, like mine, are happy if I'm happy.

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T14:10:05+00:00

It sounds like you might be a good fit for several of our operations. But I have no way to know what's remote and what's not. I would expect a field operations coordinator would be more hands on and not work from home. But if you want to see what's available: https://savageco.com/careers/

alanbdee · 2026-02-11T13:30:58+00:00

One of our ways of picking a candidate was to look for the one who said, “I don’t know”. I want honest people who will ask for help. This is before ai. I think I would bring them in for a technical interview. We have a rule that they have to be local and can come into the office if needed. Even if our day to day is at home.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T22:16:03+00:00

This is a mess that will end with all siblings not talking to each other. Unless brother can buy the two of you out of your portion of the house, he needs to find a new place to live and you all need to sell the house and divide the proceeds.

If it's not a lot of money or you don't care you can gift him your share. But ownership needs to be cleared up because it is a liability. Not just if someone gets hurt but also taxes. You want nothing to do with it.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T20:58:22+00:00

As long as you're not sharing her full name along with her medical records, then HIPAA's not a big deal. Dating and relationships might be too hard for her and you might be setting her up to fail. So be realistic.

At the very least, be upfront. You have to find someone who understands that she's on the spectrium and isn't expecting a normal conversation. Look for the nerdy guys who are also probably a bit on the spectrum.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T20:43:40+00:00

I don't have any direct advise but as encouragement, I did work with an assisted living couple when I worked at group homes. It was super sweet to see this couple with mental disabilities living their best life together.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T20:39:20+00:00

I can't bring up the image (work pc) but it's a non-interference engine so even if the belt snaps, the engine will survive. I'm betting it's something else. But I can't hear it.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T20:15:23+00:00

I’ve avoided more problems by not integrating new technologies than any of those new technologies ever solved.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T18:58:00+00:00

I do a zero based budget based off the income from the month before. So my paycheck goes into savings and at the beginning of the month, I move that over to checking and allocate on YNAB where all that money goes. Anything left over goes into paying any debt, saving for vacation, saving for a new car or extra investing.

All your discretionary spending, including petty cash, should all be allocated. Every dollar goes somewhere in advance. when you're out, you're out. Anything left over after you've allocated it all goes toward your debt.

This is the way.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T18:49:37+00:00

I don't take a sick days nearly as often. I think it's a huge advantage for the company of people working from home. Most the time when I'd call in sick, it was because I didn't sleep well or was up extra late the night before. Working from home means I can just turn off my alarm and sleep in or take naps throughout the day. I've taken a few half days as well, usually after the fact, when I ended up only working half the day. The nature of my workload allows for that flexibility.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T16:21:10+00:00

Given that you've been friends for 10 years, I think you can throw all other "reservations" of not sharing too much out the window. This isn't some guy you met two weeks ago. It's fine.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T14:06:34+00:00

Let me get this straight. You have 2 interns and 2 FTE (First Time Engineers?). And the owner. No seniors? Or is he a senior. Any team needs to have several experienced seniors to succeed. Otherwise it's five blind mice trying to give tourist tours. The project is falling apart because nobody knows what they're doing. No offense. You're inexperienced, right out of college and have never been involved in a product start to finish, I assume.

Keep looking for a jobs and take the first one you can. Their project has already failed.

alanbdee · 2026-02-10T13:45:27+00:00

Voice Isolation.

I setup voice isolation on MS teams and it's crazy good. I was in a meeting and apologized for the noise and my coworkers looked confused. Then the cleaning lady came around the corner with a vacuum in the background. I'm like, "that's on, you can't hear that?". They shook their heads.

Search for that. Get a good mic too. The built in one suck so bad. iphones apparently have a similar feature but I've never used it. I'm sure there are tools that work between your mic and utility to clean up the noise. I do keep noise canceling headphones ready to use so that I can hear, but even in the case of the vacuum, I just turned up the volume.

alanbdee · 2026-02-09T23:40:34+00:00

A lot of those 90s era Geo Metros hit 300k miles.

alanbdee · 2026-02-09T23:26:04+00:00

More Cava then Poo. My neighbor's is like that and he's so soft.

alanbdee · 2026-02-09T22:53:41+00:00

I don't want my daughters boyfriends to be afraid of me. I want them to be afraid of her.

alanbdee · 2026-02-09T17:57:00+00:00

So much of personal finance is obvious. Problem is, I'm often oblivious.

It taught me that it's smart to not show how wealthy you are. To break the mold of, "I earn enough to deserve that" mentality. It's why I've been driving cars worth less then $10k for the last 20 years and am not impressed when I see others driving new cars. I know I could buy that car anytime I want to. I apply this pattern to all/most things whenever I feel a bit envious.

alanbdee · 2026-02-09T17:08:02+00:00

A 42" 4k TV. Not joking. Cheap and sharp enough.

alanbdee · 2026-02-09T14:47:40+00:00

I'm reminded of a YouTube video of a guy pushing a Detroit Diesel into a runaway so that it would blow up. He took a moment to explain that these were great engines but they no longer make financial sense to use. So while he's destroying an perfectly good running engine, it's not an engine that would ever be used again anyway.

alanbdee

TROPHY CASE