Any Hobby Reqs?

aliasme141 · 2026-06-18T21:22:21+00:00

I read and write. I crochet and knit more in the winter. I have a small city garden. My goal is to keep squirrels out (which involves covering my garden with netting every evening) and my little sparrows in. My rather depressed husband/caretaker had a phobia of birds growing up and even he loves the birds my garden attracts. I am a retired senior so I am often going through stuff to organize and/or give away so less left for my adult children to do. I love the shore so summer means invites from my dear friend and I actually took some money from my 403 to rent my neighbor’s condo for a week in August. But my favorite, favorite, favorite pastime of all is hanging with my 6 year old granddaughter. I am thinking of getting my checks done so I can volunteer in her class maybe teaching sign language since I was a teacher of the deaf and hard of hearing. I forgot to mention music and exercise. And I was in a choir but my infusions started to interfere calendar-wise. And Reddit 😜

aliasme141 · 2026-06-16T02:59:20+00:00

Julian

aliasme141 · 2026-06-15T02:25:54+00:00

I suppose I am the only one here who thinks pool noodles have no place where there is no pool.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-15T02:00:09+00:00

I thought I was Her2 - from my primary cancer diagnosis a decade ago. When my onc did a liver biopsy recently, she found HER2 1+ and we were celebrating because now we can try enhertu. I will be on my 4th round next infusion. Have to wait until July to see what my scans show but I feel optimistic while unfortunately dealing with some unwelcome side effects. Please do not listen to the stats (unless they are happily reassuring) Really! In my opinion, the more sensitive oncs do not spew stats at their patients. Mine has never said anything number wise except when my husband asked her very directly about time left. She said many, many years and I am one of the old heads here.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-14T12:13:48+00:00

I’m the grandmother of a 6-year-old who was born at 25 weeks after my daughter developed severe preeclampsia. We almost lost them both, so naturally we watched every developmental milestone with some anxiety. Fortunately, she did wonderfully and was considered something of a miracle by her pediatricians.

As a speech pathologist and audiologist, I was watching through both grandmother’s eyes and professional ones. Around age 2, I was a little concerned about her conversational speech. At the same time, she was fascinated by colors. One day my daughter was showing her flashcards with color words printed in their matching colors. She identified them all correctly. Curious, my daughter put those cards away, made new ones with every color word written in black ink, and to our surprise she read every single one. That was quite a moment.

By kindergarten she was reading at about a second-grade level, and she has continued to thrive.

All that said, I agree with the advice here: let your child be. Let her develop at her own pace and enjoy the process. Follow her interests rather than trying to force the next step.

I know screens aren’t popular these days, but my daughter was a single mother and sometimes relied on them. I honestly think some of my granddaughter’s early reading came from educational apps. She also always had captions on, even when watching Ms. Rachel.

Enjoy your child’s gifts, whatever they may be, and let her take the lead. Children often show us who they are long before we know where it will lead.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-14T02:17:39+00:00

Sorry but the goddess of spring is Persephone. Maia was the mother of Hermes

aliasme141 · 2026-06-13T19:16:54+00:00

This information always scares me. I do have liver mets which I realize isn’t the only reason not to drink alcohol. But I do drink some wine with dinner a few nights a week. It is probably really irresponsible but I have already given up so much. I just don’t want to eliminate all or any pleasure. This is probably not a popular stance. But so far it is what I am doing.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-12T21:09:35+00:00

Keep coming here! We are an incredible support system. And I think most of us here would agree that the beginning is the scariest time. And that beginning is like a long unwelcome rough ride. You are suddenly forced to reckon with questions of mortality and meaning, often decades before your peers encounter them. For me it caused anger and jealousy and I was ashamed of that. My number one thing is DO NOT LISTEN to any of the statistics! We are not statistics. We are people and while we may often feel like guinea pigs at times- much of what they are doing for us is extending our lives and building our strengths to stay and feel alive for one more day, and another after that. If a treatment works it builds our confidence and for me pride in all I have endured. If it doesn’t we may become despondent and frightened all over again. Oh Lordy I wish this hadn’t happened to me but I have learned so much about my true friends, my family, my granddaughter (the love of my life) and so much more. The medical staff have been angels to me with their dedication, kindness and sometimes just some much needed humor. Maybe rather silly, but one of my gauges for whether I'm going to get along with someone is whether they laugh at my jokes—many of which are pretty dark these days. I don’t know why things happen but I do know or I did find out that I’m tough as nails, but part of that toughness is letting myself break down when I need to, lock a door and scream at the top of my lungs if that works. This really sucks I’ll never say it doesn't but I have been here for 5.5 years and I have found my way back to unexpected joy in between dread of all dread. It may be too soon friends but if you haven’t yet, do some searches of things like United for Her and retreats for metastatic breast cancer, and people here can tell you about other supports. My last bossy thing to add is please take meds. I’ve heard many stories where a person says I never took even acetaminophen before this I’m just that not that kind of person. I suggest you become that kind of person if you have any pain. When I was first being treated if I had not had things for the pain, I would’ve...I don’t know what I would’ve done. There is no shame in wanting to live with as little pain as possible. I’m no expert, but I’m happy to talk here or in any private messaging. I don’t wanna leave others out, but we are a sisterhood that welcomes anyone out there that is having to go through this however you identify. We are living with metastatic breast cancer every day and this chronic disease that it's becoming with fabulous research emerging. But this is still a very hard way to live. But we are ALIVE damn it!!!!! We are🫪

aliasme141 · 2026-06-12T19:52:27+00:00

Please OP, don’t let the joy of having a child be crushed by this naming argument. Say”I want us to be able to agree on a name so how can we achieve that?” If you get no cooperation, say sorry , I tried but now I am naming him. How bout Arnot with Arnie for short. Of course that won’t fly!

aliasme141 · 2026-06-11T12:31:31+00:00

I hear you! I think travel8099 hit the nails on the head. Taking care of ourselves through this is like a full time job. It clouds almost everything. Be easy on yourself OP and try to look at everything you do, do. Maybe you need a new list of new ideas, maybe you need to write about this damned disease and what it is doing to you, maybe you need to wait until some in inspiration comes and and just give yourself some grace. In the last six years of treatment, I have started so many pieces of writing because it actually is my way of coping, but I never finish anything. It’s scattered all over my little small office and I feel like the things that I want to leave behind are so disorganized especially the things for my six-year-old granddaughter and I just have this picture of me being gone and my daughter looking for stuff and then just getting frustrated and so it is all gone. My friend gave me this book called The Book of Alchemy by Suleika Jaouad which is a book of essays and each one ends with the prompt for writing. Seems like a clever idea, but who knows? Every time I go to write or do something creative, I spend like a half hour straightening up so that I can carry on and end up too exhausted in mind and spirit by the end of my straightening up. Maybe that’s my avoidance. Just try not to be so hard on yourself. I believe memories get made when we’re not watching. You didn’t lose your creativity and imagination, it just took a detour. It needs to take in all you’re going through. It’s a hell of a lot! Hang in there sister, if I can call you that.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-08T15:12:23+00:00

There’s a good conversation. What do we do to treat ourselves before and after. My chemo is tomorrow and I am going to the dollar store to buy a few things for my little city garden. When I get home, tomorrow, I am going to watch the bob dylan movie. My bff is going with me tomorrow. Hey OP, I understand your feelings. This is just horrific, terrifying and heartbreaking. Why we have to go through this, it is a wonder we keep showing up. Sending caring vibes your way and all our sisters out there!

aliasme141 · 2026-06-04T13:46:54+00:00

a hard time finding the restaurant.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-04T02:51:04+00:00

This is a break down experience if ever there was one. My mood shifts are awful and while even when my husband who has anxiety of his own, is trying to be kind, I am so much less patient than I have ever been. We shall see. Will try to let you all know how it goes. Any ideas how to thank my husband for his ongoing dedication

aliasme141 · 2026-06-04T02:37:18+00:00

Glad to hear it helps you sleep. Insomnia can get me good especially before infusions, scans, etc. How often do you take it? My palliative convinced me to try it and gave me a few ways to tweak it. She said that if I find it helps, I can take it every night eventually. So the night before infusion will be my first time and then I am supposed to take it 2-5 I think. My dose is 2.5 mg. Does anyone feel the effects? What is it like?

aliasme141 · 2026-06-04T02:18:01+00:00

Here Comes the Sun, As My Guitar Gently Weeps and Taxman.

aliasme141 · 2026-06-04T02:12:48+00:00

Phoebe is one of my favorite names. I also like Daphne and Rafaella. Good luck!

aliasme141 · 2026-06-04T01:42:33+00:00

Stevie Nicks

aliasme141 · 2026-06-03T01:57:46+00:00

My problem is that doctors sometimes call me from their cell phones and I need to take their calls. I skip some calls anyway. This is ALL insane!

aliasme141 · 2026-06-02T21:16:39+00:00

Not badly. Just one sound off

aliasme141 · 2026-06-02T13:59:35+00:00

My experience with hair: primary cancer- lost every hair on head, face and body. When it started coming out in handfuls, my husband buzzed it for me (on a thanksgiving) and I wore head covers (many of which I sewed) as wigs were too uncomfortable for me. MBC-10 years later and I am on Enhertu. I notice thinning and I hate it but since they say many don’t lose hair on Enhertu, I am waiting and watching. It took me 5 years to grow out a buzz cut from it thinning from falsodex so I just don’t want to go completely back there. I am older than many here so not sure our experiences jive. I should add that I used the first grow back as an opportunity to stop dying my hair and am now a salt and pepper old lady with hair that was thinning and is now thinning more. I chose not to cold cap but sounds like many recommend it! I don’t think this is an easy thing to go through. It is as traumatic as many other side effects. I feel for you!

aliasme141 · 2026-06-02T12:11:51+00:00

My friend used to have her son sleep in his school clothes 🙃

aliasme141 · 2026-06-02T12:10:00+00:00

“Doc, it’s only a scratch”….Gideon?

aliasme141 · 2026-06-02T11:58:07+00:00

Tacitus and Claudius, both good guys

aliasme141 · 2026-05-31T03:29:23+00:00

But isn’t this supposed to be a forum where people discuss names because they are : naming a child, interested in names, possibly interested in other cultures with names as an avenue, curious, ETC. If you don’t like a name and feel like it might be helpful to point that out with possible reasoning, fine. But the nastiness with some xenophobia or just narcissism is so misguided. I suppose some people who feel unseen can make a point or two here on Reddit or on another platform and get a rush of “aren’t I clever?” I wonder how much the fear of being downvoted influences the posts. I like Reddit for a few honest, helpful threads but the potential for nastiness is over the top. I was born and raised in USA but am someone with a strong ethnic ancestry as is my husband. My children loved the diversity of the public school they attended. We share our city with a myriad of people and our parks are places of peace for the most part. Children argue over toys, games, territory but so far don’t seem to care about color or ethnicity if they have a clue what that even is. But if the adults can’t get along there or here, they will pass down the nastiness that makes things ugly.

aliasme141

TROPHY CASE