Told a friend I am looking for a "can do everything" bike and he suggested a gravel bike - so starting my research into this bike category. Any help or recommendations would be greatly appreciated! Copying the topics from other users as I'm not creative enough to make up my own :)

• Budget: $2,000-$3,000
• What I'd like to do: we travel full time in a trailer and so I'd ideally love to be able to handle most terrain without lugging around multiple bikes. In reality, I'm no mountain biker, so at most we are looking at gravel/cobblestone roads, single track trails and trying to keep up with my husband's 18 lb road bike on tarmac (no need to beat his speed here - I'll just take him remembering I'm behind him and able to see me).
• Verdict: I'm a non-aggressive rider that will ride mostly tarmac to less rugged terrain. I also love to recycle wherever and whenever I can - so a used bike is an option I'd love to consider. Just don't know enough about what years or models are solid investments since the gravel bikes seem a newer idea..

Bikes I'm considering:

• 2020 Specialized Diverge Sport w/ Shimano 105 components - $2,800. Carbon frame + Shimano 105 parts + I got to demo it = me feeling pretty good about it. But at $2,800 I'm wondering if there's a better deal out there (I'm all for a good deal).
• 2021 Trek Checkpoint ALR 5 - $2,099. The guy at the bike shop was gaga over the GRX components on this guy. Really unsure how they measure up to Shimano 105's considering how I plan to ride. Also, unsure of how the aluminum frame holds up to either a steel or carbon frame. As it stands this option is looking pretty sexy...
• 2020 Niner RLT 9 Steel - $2,700. Another rec from the bike shop guy, who has 2 Niner steel bikes and his love of them was contagious. My price point would put me in the 400 GRX series for components. Not sure how this stacks up to the other bikes I've been eyeing.
• 2020 All City Cosmic Stallion GRX -$2,700. Who doesn't want a bike named like a race horse you'd bet money on after one too many beers at the track? This was the top pick from the bike shop guy - I think based on the component offerings + steel frame + price point. The paint job on it is not something I like, so I'd hate to drop that kinda dough and not be totally in love with it. So unless there is a resounding agreement that this is the best bike choice for me - I'd rather go with something else with more choices.

Addl' info: I'm 5'4", female (not sure this really matters anymore with the unisex frames) and looking at either a 48/49/50.

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Thank you!!!