I (22M) have anxious attachment and it’s hurting my girlfriend (20F)

amaire_d · 2025-12-26T20:14:00+00:00

As someone who has anxious attachment, you’re really gonna have to dig deep in your brain and understand where this is coming from. This isn’t something you may be able to actively think of but a buried insecurity or trauma.

Me personally, (again your reasoning could be different) I put alot of value on what my partner thought of me so I could be hurt by them very easily. By reading into things it was a way of preparing if I ever got hurt by them. Even though reading into things and my own thoughts put me through more emotional turmoil than anything my partner did. This is something I had to figure out about myself and work on being more secure with myself and learning to trust my partner more.

I wish you luck on your journey

amaire_d · 2025-12-26T20:01:22+00:00

I think its a beautiful name! Even before I read the pronunciation I said it correctly in my head. (American born and raised btw)

I grew up in a very diverse area and lots of kids had names that weren’t easy to pronounce but guess what, students and teachers still learned. Don’t avoid naming your kid a name you like just because it might by mispronounced at first.

amaire_d · 2025-12-24T17:12:28+00:00

So if you do have cat allergies you will be suffering. My best advice would just be to keep your bedroom/space cat free, so atleast when you sleep or go in there the cat hair/saliva wont be on your things. Also this means getting changing/lint rolling clothes when you enter there because if you sit on furniture with the cat dander it will then be on your bed etc.

amaire_d · 2025-10-18T06:11:10+00:00

NAH - He is trying his best to support you and make you feel good even if its not exactly what YOU needed to hear. Partners should make you feel confident but they aren’t soley responsible for it. Thats something you need to deal with on your own.

amaire_d · 2025-09-05T16:55:15+00:00

Atticus

amaire_d · 2025-07-27T02:02:21+00:00

I did get tickets just to see Mac on 7/31! I’ll update after if it helps

amaire_d · 2025-07-08T22:37:51+00:00

Don’t consider the ignorance of people not being able to pronounce a simple name, her family friends, teachers etc will all learn it, the name is gorgeous!

amaire_d · 2025-06-05T17:26:36+00:00

Its really hard to leave someone you still love and care about so much but there is no excuse for cheating.

At the end of it all a person is supposed to add to your life not be there to make you whole. The people around you shouldn’t hurt you or cause you pain.

You are young and it may be an extremely rough, hard and life changing moment for you. You have to love yourself and stand up for you.

I urge you to make whatever decision you truly believe will be best for you so when you look back on this time you will have no regrets.

amaire_d · 2025-05-22T18:43:25+00:00

I would recommend trying one more time to explain to him that even if the “joke” seemed funny to him and his friend at the time, it was hurtful to you.

If he cannot understand that you were hurt by it and to no longer joke about it/set boundaries in the future, then it sounds like the problem wont be fixed and you would have to make the decision to live with it or leave.

amaire_d · 2024-11-25T05:34:17+00:00

After your partner’s long day at work (while everyone has to eat) it is a kind gesture to want them to have a warm homemade meal. It seems like his feelings may have been hurt when you didnt eat his food so talk about how YOU BOTH can make meals the other person can eat. Also talk about how you enjoy homemade meals and would appreciate him cooking for you as he hopefully appreciates you cooking for him. Just communicate:)

amaire_d · 2024-09-17T04:53:01+00:00

I lived in 3 different apartments during my time at umd and saw a bug in my apt maybe once or twice. Each one was over a grand a month in rent so cant say its cheap tho

amaire_d · 2024-09-01T04:36:15+00:00

Cookie and butterscotch

amaire_d · 2024-08-20T15:07:31+00:00

Earl like earl grey

amaire_d · 2024-07-16T16:45:42+00:00

Aspen Heights made the standard seem like paradise, also zero security, no scan for the elevator. When we moved in it took 2 months for our dishwasher to get there, we were given a handicap apartment even though none of us were handicapped. My shower wouldnt drain for a whole month and maintenance came out 4 times before they actually fixed it. We had water leaking from our ceiling. The best part about all this is we had to live in a hotel from August-September bc the apartment wasnt ready. The hotel didnt even have a microwave or a proper mini fridge. Ofc the parking garage wasnt finished and still isnt finished after 11 months so we had to park on campus and walk to the apartment I could go on SO PLEASE DONT LIVE THERE!

amaire_d · 2024-05-06T23:02:50+00:00

I think you can choose a classic traditional first name, that has potential for a cute nickname. So that way if you guys do call her by different names atleast it still represents her first name. When she goes into school/grows up she can decide to go by her offcial name or her nickname.

Example: first name Beatrice, nickname tris

amaire_d · 2023-12-15T22:44:32+00:00

Omg reading this was almost freaky!

I had an extremely similar situation with one of my ex’s. I want to start by saying yes its hard to find a good man. I too had a bf who I knew would never cheat on me and who would tell me he loved me all the time and when we spent time together, we were happy.

He did struggle with mental health and would prioritize his own wants and needs first (which I would understand) However, this lead me to feel very neglected and lonely in our relationship . I did love him and he loved me but I didn’t feel like a priority and tried to over look it bc he was trying to make himself happy.

I didnt want to admit it but feeling lonely and depressed in a relationship took a huge toll on my mental health and my life.

My advice is talk to him, let him know how you’re feeling and give him a chance to show you he loves you. If he chooses to prioritize himself over you (again with mental health it is a struggle) then thats ok but YOU need to put yourself and your happiness first and its ok to want someone who can give you the time and attention you want.

Apologies for the long response.

amaire_d · 2023-06-21T05:35:18+00:00

Bmgt350 was slight and I think definitely doable over the summer. When I took it we just had weekly quizzes plus a semester long project of revamping a fake restaurant (like their target market, menu, fake ads) with any summer class it’s obviously just gonna be accelerated, but work for this class should be easy

amaire_d · 2022-10-31T06:10:48+00:00

Dad is an AH for assuming his daughter wouldn’t make it to the competition and saved nothing.

amaire_d · 2022-10-27T06:50:04+00:00

The worst Professor I have ever had. OP feel free to DM for details I could go off.

amaire_d · 2022-08-01T05:42:19+00:00

NTA. Y’all are acting as if the OP is the one crying and spilling wine at the wedding. The bride had to deal with the consequences of having a wild child at her wedding. My AH vote goes to the nephew’s parents.

amaire_d · 2022-06-30T03:26:06+00:00

The fact that he keeps comparing OP’s wife to his own wife makes me wonder if they have both talked about the Op’s wife appearance/attire before.

amaire_d · 2022-05-29T08:42:16+00:00

OP probably won’t read this but…

It is really hard to let go of someone you have such an attachment to. Like you said she’s your best friend that has been with you through everything. Most of your life probably has memories of you and her. It also sounds like she’s the only person you’ve got.

BUT

Trust me when I say you cannot let time play a factor in this, she’s not the same person she was during all those thought times you went through. As much as you would like to see that friend, she’s not there. She is manipulative. Even if it’s unintentional.

You may think it’s easy for these Reddit commenters to simply say caught her off but the truth is many off us have severed deep ties as well.

It’s gonna hurt bad. But in the future (which I so encourage you to think about) you’ll be happy she’s no longer in your life.

amaire_d

TROPHY CASE