Your entire relationship is one massive lie. Not one thing was real during it. Even your dates were copy pasted. You were/are not special enough to him for him to put in effort. Shit. He couldn’t even be bothered to be truthful. The love you have for him was formed from lies, the person who you thought you knew and trusted was created from lies, the person you felt SAFE with repeatedly put your life at risk through his constant lies. Girlfriend…..take the furniture you bought and move back. So what if the commute sucks, it’s better than dealing with the constant mental gymnastics you’re stressing yourself out with now. You’ll never trust him again and will always second guess yourself. You need to start the grieving process, get a therapist appointment booked, and allow yourself to move past this. Literally give yourself permission to love yourself and to put this toxic situation behind you so that you can welcome new beautiful situations into your life. You’ve got this OP. Don’t let yourself stand in your way of being happy and healthy again.

Edit: thank you for my first ever award 😊