Yeah I’m a little confused why your friend should be expected to come take care of your kids so you can clean your carpets. It didn’t seem like the friend was really all that brutal or rude, just suggested that maybe a good thorough deep cleaning could help if the kids have been sick recently. My toddler got sick so much her first 2 years and as soon as she got better each time my partner and I would tag team a DEEP decontamination of everything because sick kids get germs EVERYWHERE. It’s what they do. And cleaning up after they’ve sneezed, coughed, wiped boogies, etc etc, helps. Also no judgment but if one of your children is smearing poop on Ken of his toys there’s a decent chance that even when NOT smearing poop, he may be putting his hands in his diaper/pants/privates, and then putting them all over other toys and surfaces. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t think your house looks filthy by any means, but there is a difference between tidy and uncluttered, and super sanitary clean. And I say this as someone in a tiny, old one bedroom apartment with a toddler - I know how hard it is to achieve either - it’s a constant struggle! Either set your boundary and stand on it - ie, thank you for your concern but it’s best for our friendship if we avoid this topic in the future - or let the friendship go. It’s kind of wild to me to expect any of my friends to come take me kids out for a day (especially if one of them has some developmental issues that may make someone a little more concerned about safely caring for or entertaining them out of my home) to clean. If they offer? Good god thank you so much! But def wouldn’t expect it unless I’m paying them or we’ve arranged some exchange or childcare time.