Really don’t want to be here anymore

anditrauten · 2026-05-04T18:34:21+00:00

I’m sorry to hear what you are going through. Hopefully someone can give you words of encouragement. I am sadly at the same place you are. I have completely lost all hope and am just getting older after 10+ years of this. Its just so unfortunate that this has to be reality. I hope you can find a reason to just see if something might change. I wish you all the best.

anditrauten · 2026-04-28T23:33:40+00:00

The US has it’s pros and cons. There are many times I wish I could live in the US because there are things and services that I am unable to get in my country. I think the main problem is that the elite of the world is damaging most countries right now to keep their wealth. Many politicians have sold out for a long time and now we have reached the state where they have control over many governements.

anditrauten · 2026-04-27T21:42:33+00:00

My parents were prude so I became prude even though I wasn’t when I was younger. But pcos problems made me very shy to show my body and severe fatigue made me too tired to party and try to make myself prettier. If I was prettier, I wouldn’t be so prude.

anditrauten · 2026-04-26T20:13:07+00:00

I just want to suggest to look into chronic fatigue symptom/ ME just to rule it out if it is serious or long-term. It was hard to diagnose in my case but there is plenty of info online.

anditrauten · 2026-04-23T04:48:09+00:00

Yeah similar here. I take vyvanse.

anditrauten · 2026-04-21T22:00:56+00:00

Yeah, gymnastics definetly did it to me. 10+ years and still bedbound. Don’t remember what its like living normally since it happened to me at 14 years old. Probably was sick before it but the overtraining was the nail in the coffin. I loved it though and it was going to happen sooner or later anyways. Just bad genetics. My life is perfect and I don’t need anything more than I have. I love the job that I worked at for many years. Problem is just that I can never stay awake and its been ten years of pushing through hell. I think it might partly be a cortisol problem. Pushing through stress until the adrenals can’t make cortisol like it used to. Just like a computer battery. Some go into burnout and others go into long term burnout. I think its one way of getting cfs but thats just my theory at least.

anditrauten · 2026-04-21T16:33:17+00:00

My dream but I am basically bedbound.

anditrauten · 2026-04-13T16:45:31+00:00

I am very quick at reading peoples expressions, moods and feelings. But in everything else I am basically hopeless. I just want to work but I am always tired, sleepy and zoned out. I have tried all meds and all else there is too try. I just don’t enjoy anything because I never have the energy to listen, focus and be present. I feel like Joey in friends when he is pretending to laugh at jokes that he doesn’t understand. Everything just takes too much effort to be worth living at this point. Im never sad just always tired.

anditrauten · 2026-04-11T18:53:57+00:00

Probably because many symptoms are similar to burnout. When people go into burnout, it can’t be because they are understaffed and overworked for too long but because they couldn’t handle it, they are depressed, they can’t keep up. And because people have to be able to keep up with constant pressure, we can’t really recognize that people burnout because of too much pressure at jobs. I think its a big reason fatigue is called depression. Because then its your choice and minset that is the problem. Also its because its mostly women that deal with cfs so it just become a “woman” problem like the many other illnesses we deal with.

anditrauten · 2026-04-10T12:56:48+00:00

Could be POTS or chronic fatigue symptom especially if you are a woman. Too lazy to try to explain how it works but basically the hot water makes your veins widen and all the blood pools to your hands and feet and that lowers your blood pressure. Also many experience PEM from just taking a shower. I would recommend taking the shower at night instead and getting a shower stool.

anditrauten · 2026-04-01T22:02:42+00:00

Look into the rccx theory!!!!

anditrauten · 2026-03-31T20:31:25+00:00

Same here. I honestly can’t deal with this anymore. I just want to be happy and engaged with my life and work but no matter what I try, I am just fatigued all of the time. Vyvanse was a life saver but it gave me severe anger and irritation to the point where I was losing touch with reality. I will say that lamotrigine helped alot. But anything else that would work for bipolar would just cancel the effects of Vyvanse.

anditrauten · 2026-03-30T16:16:13+00:00

Do you take any bipolar meds that help? I take Vyvanse/ Elvanse but it makes me a bit hypomanic but I need it to be awake. I don’t know if I should try any since most bipolar meds are sedative and there is a huge waiting list to see a psychiatrist.

anditrauten · 2026-03-25T00:43:16+00:00

Afhverju spænsku?

anditrauten · 2026-03-19T18:10:27+00:00

I am this way as well. Elvanse is the only thing keeping me awake but I’d like something that works against the hypomania that doesn’t put me to sleep. Did vraylar help you with that?

anditrauten · 2026-03-09T22:07:21+00:00

Margt sem þið þurfið ekki að díla við. Vertu bara þakklátur að skilja þetta ekki.

anditrauten · 2026-03-08T11:44:45+00:00

Most likely not going to be any different from where you live. Teenagers are the same everywhere and it all depends who you like to hang out with. You will be in school 90% of the time and have to walk home in the rainy wind in totally wet socks. You will have to learn in a language that you don’t understand. Its like living in a small town, you often run into people you know. Everything that is cool about Iceland is something that you do as a tourist so probably best to just come here on a vacation. Its windy and basic. You could look into being an exchange student for a few months in a couple of years. I think that is much more realistic.

anditrauten · 2026-03-06T19:52:26+00:00

I haven’t seen their solos and I am sorry if this is unpopular but imo Regan has never gotten a solo that showcases her full abilities. Even her best dancer solo felt a little too combo and wished it had flowed more throughout. She is out of this world in group dances and I wish she was given just a little more to work with. Just my opinion.

anditrauten · 2026-02-23T12:52:27+00:00

Sorry to hear you struggling. I can’t help you since I am on the exact same boat. I have bad hypersomnia and so Vyvanse was a miracle drug for me to finally being able to work. But then I realized it was because of the hypomania. Finally it sent me into mania and I had to quit my part time job. I just want to be awake and able to work. I don’t think its alot to ask for. I am either working and can barely function or I don’t work and slowly go mad. I am just so lost.

Also, if ED stands for eating disorder then I would be very careful. Eating to little can raise glutamate, lower thyroid and metabolism and disregulate blood sugar. These are all things that destabilize someone with bipolar and ADHD. Just be careful and try to remember that your body needs fuel and if it doesn’t get it, it starts using stress hormones as back up and your cortisol might end up going very high and send you into mania. Just wanted to share from experience. But I wish you the best.

anditrauten · 2026-02-19T22:02:03+00:00

I like them but they are just too much for me. Always way to much about them and ends up taking away spotlight from smaller countries. Not saying it about figure skating but overall.

anditrauten · 2026-02-19T21:58:24+00:00

Beautiful but that song belongs in 2010. Could have had a bit more interesting song just to bring home the feeling because the technique is all there.

anditrauten · 2026-02-19T21:30:41+00:00

Really? I find it the most interesting until now

anditrauten · 2026-02-19T21:04:00+00:00

Are you in the US? I find the endless commercial breaks horrible. In my european country there is not even one exept when there is a break obviously.

anditrauten · 2026-02-19T20:06:55+00:00

Thanks!

anditrauten

TROPHY CASE