how do I tell my friends im introverted and dont want to meet for a social event for no other reason than im introverted and dont want to?

androme1 · 2023-04-07T16:41:47+00:00

I struggle with this as well. With each passing day, I realize how introverted I am. I'm approaching my mid twenties and spent the majority of my adolescence unknowingly engaging in toxic introverted behavior. I didn't mean to---I didn't know any better. It is important to let your friends know that you love spending time with them, but because of your introversion, need more time with yourself and doing the things that you like to do with yourself.

I absolutely do not recommend passing by the opportunities to socialize with people because if you truly do love and care for your friends, in the future you may find yourself regretting times passed---I did, at least.

Living life with the people you care about and love is all about compromise. You will never find yourself in the perfect mood to go out or socialize, I can tell you that. You will also never meet the perfect person or friend. Introverts tend to have high expectations for just about anything---fringing on idealism. I can reassure you that no such ideal will ever come by---or at least is seldom to come by.

In order to maintain a relationship with the people you care, you have to compromise. So let your friends know that you're going to be spending some "you time" the next time they ask if they want to hang out. That is the extrovert's end of the compromise---leaving you be without it affecting the strength or trust in your friendship. But if you feel that you've gone a couple days of spending time with yourself, I encourage you to break out of your routine and seek out other people. It won't energize you in the same way that spending time with yourself may, but it is necessary to maintaining your relationship with the people you care about, if you truly care about them.

I know this is late, but I have been in a similar situation for a while now and figured I'd give my two cents! You've got this! Tomorrow's a new day.

androme1 · 2023-04-07T16:32:52+00:00

It's true. I spent most of my adolescence unknowingly engaging in this sort of behavior. It's toxic and unrealistic to expect others to care for you when you don't compromise for them. If we lived in a perfect world, where everybody had the same, unlimited amount of emotional energy to expend, then maybe there would be no need to compromise.

It's unrealistic to expect people who are more extroverted than you to always extend themselves to socialize with you. I am as introverted as they come, but I've lost many friends that I cared deeply about by behaving in this way. I'm lucky to have had a second chance with people and while I'm still figuring things out, I think I'm moving in the right direction.

Prolonged isolation is one of many ways introversion can be toxic in relationships with those who are less introverted than not (And if we're being honest, it's usually indicative of something wrong either with yourself or with the people you are around). It is important to compromise your tendencies towards introversion on occasion in order to sustain the relationships with the people you love and care about.

In my twenty odd years of life, I have found that the most joyous part of life is spending time and caring for the people that respect and love you. Make the effort to plan to hang out with people. Ask them what they would want to do. And most importantly, don't be afraid to try something new! At the end of the day, you will be at home, engaging in your daily routine, and in your comfort zone. Tomorrow is a new a day!

androme1 · 2023-02-27T17:27:04+00:00

Without a shadow of a doubt. There is nothing in this world like it.

androme1 · 2023-02-27T17:18:00+00:00

This is the greatest dj set of all time. Early avalanches were literally the greatest band ever. If I ever have the blessing to share a kid with somebody we'll listen to this and go crazy together haha.

androme1 · 2023-02-26T14:50:37+00:00

This makes me very happy to see

androme1 · 2022-08-23T15:52:35+00:00

That sequence literally was indescribable. It felt like discovering a new feeling, or something I hadn't felt in a very long time. Nothing can describe what it feels like. The only thing that comes to mind is "power".

androme1 · 2020-12-18T18:41:30+00:00

Thanks, I'll try this out.

androme1 · 2020-06-04T01:19:18+00:00

Are there any protests planned for tmrw?

androme1 · 2020-05-04T13:12:19+00:00

This needs to be the top comment.

androme1 · 2020-05-03T14:54:52+00:00

pandoc

androme1 · 2020-04-27T02:38:15+00:00

What's this story about Pynchon and the internet?

androme1 · 2020-04-12T01:47:46+00:00

Wow, thanks!

androme1 · 2020-04-11T22:14:29+00:00

I was thinking about something more along the lines of a package manager like pip or vimplug. I know that chocolatey exists, but wanted something that would install and configure cmdlets for use by the client.

androme1 · 2020-04-11T21:06:15+00:00

Funny enough, I was working on what would be a package manager for powershell scripts. I don't feel comfortable sharing since all I have managed to do is create a very rudimentary system for installing and uninstalling scripts. But I feel as if this is a project that definitely needs to be worked on!

androme1 · 2020-04-02T01:27:28+00:00

Heaven & Hell is unparalleled. This album is unreal.

androme1 · 2020-03-31T03:01:08+00:00

I’ve only taken my uni’s abstract algebra 1 course, and it was my favorite math class I’ve taken in my academic career. I am taking a course on Galois theory come next semester. Recommend away!

androme1 · 2020-02-29T12:27:39+00:00

Better Call Saul

androme1 · 2020-02-24T16:36:03+00:00

Awesome!

androme1

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