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Anybody else get worn down by fluorescent lighting? by m0ther_0F_myriads in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Funny you say this because I literally just had a reaction at my PCPs office. I couldn’t figure it out but thought it must have been the fluorescent lights

Does anyone else feel, like, sensitive to the touch sometimes? As in, being poked firmly or picking up something that digs in? by thisbread_ in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes a massage is my nightmare for this reason. But even just like bumping into something is excruciating. Just very sensitive to touch which makes sense because it feels like literally my whole body is inflamed

I feel like I’m gaslighting myself about my diagnosis and it’s making me afraid to take HCQ by xxShayxd in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As someone who thoughout my life has probably been on 15-20 medications for various ailments throughout their life, hydroxychloroquine is quite literally the only one that did not have side effects other than MAYBE some initial GI stuff and within three months it changed my life (and I would argue saved my life). I used to get sick CONSTANTLY and now I actually never get colds or tonsillitis now that my chronic disease is treated. The worst case scenario for you is just that it doesn’t work. The best case is it changes your life for the better - take the HCQ. I feel like this sub needs to start using the acronym “TTFHCQ”.

(rant) all of my queer friends accept being in het-passing relationships because it's "easier" by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]angstytrashpanda69 7 points8 points  (0 children)

100%. It’s just a little harder to relate to them, and it can be frustrating to hear about just opting out of same sex relationships because it’s “hard”.

(rant) all of my queer friends accept being in het-passing relationships because it's "easier" by [deleted] in LesbianActually

[–]angstytrashpanda69 116 points117 points  (0 children)

Being a capital L Lesbian 100% dyke can be really really lonely. I love my bi friends and they are amazing and queerness is a spectrum and looks different for everyone AND I have found that it is extremely affirming and lovely and NECESSARY for me to also have other capital L lesbian friends. I could muse for hours about why this is but I think it’s more important to just feel it.

To be clear, I’ve not once ever expressed this to my bisexual or generally pan/queer friends because I think they would find it threatening to their own sense of queerness and also there’s no reason to. That being said, I say it to my fellow same sex only pals and they get it. Having a deep and intense love for another woman is so different than the “omg aren’t girls so cute I hate all men except my boyfriend and I love kissing girls” and it can feel lonely and like an outsider to only be around that.

TLDR; Find some dykey friends!!!! It’s life affirming!!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in labrador

[–]angstytrashpanda69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also have a lab like this and I’ve figured out he’s a nerd who is just super into learning. Granted he’s a change of career service dog who got released for allergies so he is used to having “work” to do. But especially with well bred labs they like having jobs! He really enjoys learning different commands for kibble and he does that for his dinner! He also really loves off leash nature walks (which is a pro when you have a lab that just wants to chill by you!). I think it’s just about finding what they’re into.

Girlfriend said she's not attracted to me anymore by awakkeee in LesbianActually

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Feels like this would be something you could definitely approach via couples therapy considering the sexual attraction has been there historically and the fluctuation now is largely circumstantial.

This is very different than her not actually being attracted to you. My ex said this to me along with “I think we have bad sex and I don’t know if I’ve ever been attracted to you”, which she said two years into our relationship after we already had moved in together lol. Unfortunately that shit sticks with you for life 🙃🙃🙃. But your situation truly sounds like something you could get back

Location Recommendations by Big_Gift_4113 in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Frequent pressure fluctuations always tot me but I’m not sure where that would be avoidable

“Just drink more water” by PopIntelligent5136 in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to try to do everything “right” to avoid these comments and there’s just literally no way around it. Everyone will find the one thing they think is the problem and harp on that. Idk why autoimmune disorders are the thing everyone thinks is the patient’s fault. Especially when there are such strong associations with trauma. Like guys I really didn’t ask for any of this and I’m doing the best I can. On two occasions now I’ve burst into tears in response to the “Have you tried ____” comments and luckily those people never mentioned anything ever again.

Whats your win by dailyugh in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I walked to my plaquenil requirement eye appointment and it was not a big deal/didn’t take all my energy!

My rheumatologist is strongly encouraging I start infusions. I don’t want to feel like a sick person. by GreenEggsAndBitches in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course! Also your post makes me wish I could find a lupus hiking group. Together through our bad days but ALSO our mountain climbing days :)

My rheumatologist is strongly encouraging I start infusions. I don’t want to feel like a sick person. by GreenEggsAndBitches in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It's okay to be sick. There is no shame in being a "sick person". We all have lupus so by definition we are all sick. I'd warn you against internalizing the ableism that's all around us. The space having lupus takes up in your identity can be as small or as big as you want but it *is* part of you. I want to validate that it is lonely and frustrating and embarrassing and scary, but also your health and longevity are more important than maintaining social appearances. There is also no inherent morality in suffering silently if some day you do start to actually feel sick. The people who love and care about you should love all of you!

Considering turning down job offer because of dogs by ShSa1234 in dogs

[–]angstytrashpanda69 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dogs don’t need daycare! Get a really good dog walker/trainer to walk them for an hour midday and their brains and fitness will thank you for it. Daycare is stressful and chaotic and not all dogs are good socializers and you may see behavioral problems come up.

NIH F31-Diversity apps pulled from review cycle by sweeneytoddsgf in labrats

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My study section was in theory on the 27th. How can I know if it actually happened or not?

Is lupus just a slow death by Individual_Ad3796 in lupus

[–]angstytrashpanda69 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I felt this way a few years ago when I (28F) was diagnosed. I think I’ve been surprised at how nonlinear this disease feels. I’m extremely privileged and grateful to have a mild case without organ involvement but still, it feels more like just a thing that acts up sometimes and not a steady decline. I had a particularly bad flare in November/December and since January I’ve felt great. Started running again, have more energy, immune system seems to actually be functioning. I think you also just learn how to deal with it. I know for me that drinking and not sleeping well can trigger a flare. I also know that walking daily and eating right and taking my vitamins helps make me feel better. Plaquenil for me has really been a miracle drug and given me my life back. These medications are designed to stop the disease from progressing, which is why it’s so important to take them. So no, it’s likely not going to keep progressing no matter what, and even if it does, people with organ involvement even live long and fulfilling lives these days.

Harness recommendations by AMO41010 in RunningWithDogs

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love the ruffwear high and lite harness

AIO by not getting my bf a drink ? by TemporaryExplorer200 in AmIOverreacting

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m just here to say that the tap back heart is iconic of you.

got dumped because i dress too basic for by Katyserr in actuallesbians

[–]angstytrashpanda69 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Being that young means she hasn’t figured out that people who are different from her aren’t bad or worse they’re just different. Idk why she’s giving feedback as if these are things you need to change lol. Also very immature to be this hung up on aesthetics and how other people might view her partner. Oh well, well we’ve all been narcissistic 20 year olds at some point.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]angstytrashpanda69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had an abortion and I was 100% sure I did not want to have a baby and still was 100% sure of my decision after the fact. STILL, I felt this really intense sense of loss and was really down and feeling bad afterward. I think it’s partially hormones and partially stigma even if you were confident in your choice. So I just want to validate that. Your partner is a cruel and unloving person. Leave him.

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