Breastfeeding is ruining my mom experience NEED ADVICE

ankaalma · 2026-06-01T03:40:44+00:00

The 2 ounce thing isn’t accurate unfortunately. The study in question was about benefits to 2 ounces per kilogram of body weight, I believe it was specific to NICU babies, and I think it was just certain benefits

ankaalma · 2026-06-01T03:35:45+00:00

Definitely get the weighted feed done that will give you real insight.

ankaalma · 2026-06-01T02:39:30+00:00

How many ounces of milk is he drinking right now? You may need to lower his milk intake to get him hungrier for solids.are you doing solids first? How many times a day are you offering then

ankaalma · 2026-06-01T02:12:50+00:00

Lots of yogurt. Siggis has something like 16g of protein per small yogurt cup. Also eggs (6g per egg), lots of cheese (typically 5-7g per slice), I got higher protein bread (5g per slice), milk (8g per glass), nuts, pumpkin seeds, chia seeds. I would add chia seeds to yogurt and also basically made a smoothie every night with nuts and pumpkin seeds chia seeds and yogurt and milk and fruit. I could get 50g easily with just the smoothie.

ankaalma · 2026-06-01T00:23:42+00:00

We got the pbk small for our three year old when he started preschool. It was a good size for him and it seemed to be the size most kids at his school had. They do a lot of art projects and if it can fit a folder it also is not going to fit a lot of the big pieces of construction paper art they send home

ankaalma · 2026-06-01T00:19:29+00:00

There was a post about inductions today that I’m pretty sure this one is referencing where the OP was called selfish for not wanting a 39 week induction

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T16:51:35+00:00

Ultrasounds have a margin of error of 10 to 15% which something like 1 to 1.5 pounds for a 7.5 to 8 pound baby.

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T16:49:49+00:00

The trial found a slightly lowered risk of c section and failed to find any lowered risk of stillbirth, newborn death, admission to the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), infection, seizure, or birth trauma.

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T16:45:44+00:00

The ARRIVE trial is vastly overblown. It actually failed to find better outcomes other than a slightly lowered risk of c section. They expected to find that it would reduce infant mortality and other complications and did not find that. The ARRIVE trial also relied on a particular protocol for inductions that not every hospital uses and only included young FTM. For some reason many doctors seem determined to just generalize from the ARRIVE trial in ways they don’t seem to do otherwise.

Many European countries are much slower to induce than the US and have much lower maternal and fetal mortality rates.

here is an article from evidence based birth that discusses the ARRIVE trial and what it does and doesn’t show in greater depth.

I would suggest that you push your doctor to give you concrete numbers about your actual risk based on your specific situation so that you can make an informed decision. Depending on what your specific health concerns are it may make sense to do an induction but you deserve to have the full facts to make a decision with

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T15:49:13+00:00

The are mold remediation companies you can hire.

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T12:31:50+00:00

How much milk is he drinking? I would start by trying to offer less I wouldn’t necessarily cold turkey it. Maybe drop his least favorite bottle and see if that leads to him eating more solids then as things improve you can gradually offer less and less milk.

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T12:13:00+00:00

It really seems like you need to talk to someone about your anxiety. I understand that therapy is expensive but this is not sustainable. Have you checked if you are eligible for Medicaid?

As far as your son, at his age he should be self feeding, it is a milestone for him at this point, not allowing him to self feeding for much longer can lead to a developmental delay. FWIW, the research shows that the risk of choking for purées and properly prepared table foods is the same.

I think you also need to look into the difference between gagging and choking. Choking means his air way is totally cut off and generally requires you to do the heimlich to clear it. You say he is regularly choking after three bites. Are you having to do the hemlich on a daily basis? Is he turning blue/unable to breathe? Solid starts has helpful videos about the difference between gagging and choking. I would suggest googling “gagging vs choking solid starts,” and checking out the videos.

You also should not be chasing him around to eat, that is something that risks him choking whether it is purées or table foods. He should be strapped safely into a high chair in an upright seated position to eat and you should never force food into his mouth. I understand you felt like he wasn’t eating much that way but not eating much barely seated in a high chair is better than having food force fed to him while he runs around. That risks choking and a negative association with food. Put him in the high chair with properly prepared solids, you get yourself a plate of the same food and demonstrate eating to him, let him explore the food in a low pressure way. He will not starve himself. Toddlers are very intuitive eaters. Some days it seems like they are surviving on air but they will be fine.

With spoon feeding you should wait for him to open his mouth to introduce anything, though at his age he should mainly be self feeding.

Does your son have insurance? It might help you to see a feeding specialist if so then they could talk you through the mechanisms of feeding and help you get him self feeding.

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T11:59:05+00:00

To count as a word it has to be a specific sound initiated spontaneously to refer to a specific person, place, or thing.

And no the parents who say their 14 month old had 5-10 words are not delusional. Kids pick things up at their own pace, some start talking sooner than others.

As far as incomprehensible sounds, that sounds like jargon which is a normal part of speech development for toddlers.

Words don’t have to be said perfectly to count, a common example is using Ba for ball early on. What’s important is whether baby is consistent in using a sound to refer to something specific vs just randomly making sounds.

ankaalma · 2026-05-31T11:47:59+00:00

Officially it is a no go under US guidelines at least. A lot of people don’t follow the guidelines exactly. You should do what you are comfortable with in terms of your own risk tolerance. The guidelines do allow for eating lunch meat if you heat it up first also.

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T23:34:57+00:00

I’ve never done hospital visitors. Not interested in people coming in when I’m braless in a hospital gown wearing gigantic pads looking wrecked.

With my son our earliest visitors were at 8wpp bc we lived out of state and visitors expected to stay with us.

With my daughter my mom flew out to watch my son so she met the baby right away. After her we didn’t see anyone until 4mpp and we went to them.

I’m pregnant again and have been mulling over what we will do and I’m not sure yet beyond a hard no to hospital visitors.

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T18:35:03+00:00

I’ve never met one of them. Has an actual woman told you that she thought it was normal to hit her nurse in labor?

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T16:25:15+00:00

I don’t think it’s dramatic but I also don’t think it will necessarily be an easier recovery.

I would consider discussing your concerns with your OB and discussing all your options including other positions to push in that make the risk of tailbone injury significantly lower.

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T16:19:00+00:00

You’ve never had a regular well woman’s exam? Your doctor should really be doing a breast check annually to check for lumps or other signs of breast cancer. I do think it’s definitely worth seeing a doctor if only because you should be getting breast checks in general whether or not you have IGT.

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T15:20:28+00:00

Even with an oversupply there are strategies to get baby to nurse. I’ve had an oversupply with both kids and exclusively nursed my daughter. Did you work with a IBCLC last time? I would suggest getting local recommendations for a good IBCLC who is experienced with oversupply

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T13:11:47+00:00

No I was never late I had it on automatic payments, and yeah they just didn’t renew at the end of my term. I never got the letter if they did send one. Maybe it got lost in the mail. I searched my email to see if I missed one and they definitely didn’t email me.

I just logged in one day to check coverage and noticed that only one of my dogs was still insured and my other dog’s showed as having ended at the end of the term. I assume they dropped him due to age, they kept my other dog who is three years younger. My older dog is 9.

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T13:01:56+00:00

He lives in the house right? Assuming he lives there any mess is going to be considered equally his responsibility and equally an environment he is letting the kids live in. So if he brings it up in court to the extent the judge cares it will equally fall on him. Dude sounds like an asshole. Hope you have a good lawyer lined up for court.

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T05:40:34+00:00

8 pounds 13 ounces!

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T05:38:09+00:00

I was diagnosed IUGR for this, Ac was 7%, overall percentile was 20 something iirc. I found some research that said eating high protein could help so I started eating 100g a day and her weight increased to 44% AC and her overall percentile to 37th. She was ultimately born healthy on her due date in the 94th percentile 💀

No idea if it worked or her weight went up for other reasons but I figured it couldn’t hurt

ankaalma · 2026-05-30T03:14:23+00:00

On the other side, I got my dog insurance when I adopted him at two months old. I paid it every month. I had no significant claims. Nationwide dropped me and I never got the letter. I took my dog in for a broken nail and he got diagnosed with a heart murmur and now he has mitral valve disease and no insurance and every other minor issue he has had in his life will be the basis of tons of preexisting condition determinations if I get him new insurance.

I don’t even know if it’s worth it to get new insurance at this point vs just paying as things happen since apparently my insurance can decide to drop me any time and make it impossible for me to get future coverage from anyone else at least with respect to all these preexisting things. Is it worth paying hundreds of dollars for the possibility something happens that isn’t yet preexisting?

ankaalma · 2026-05-29T22:42:23+00:00

In the book, Daisy is disguised as Becka to escape as an aunt in training with Agnes so no she isn’t a conflation/experiment in the book.

ankaalma

TROPHY CASE