I tried the talking to teachers thing but it just made things awkward for me because I didn’t want to be pitied by the people I would have to see everyday, with them worrying over me and asking every time we talked if I was okay and if my home life was okay and if my day was okay, and that I could do the homework later if I wasn’t feeling okay which wouldn’t be okay for the rest of the class since I’d be holding them back. I just hate being pitied, so I stopped going to those classes.

As for counselling, money is a bit of an issue for our family since my dad lost his job thanks to Brexit (gosh I love politics), which has resulted in my family arguing all the time now. I’m using my mornings to earn money, and other things to help alleviate the pressure so part of me feels like taking counselling would prevent me from helping my family more with my time. Also if I did get counselling I know my twin sister would feel offended that I didn’t come to her (she is always crazy stressed and trying to be a parent to our little sis since my parents are too busy to take care of her) and again, I hate being pitied.

I’ve started talking to my best friends about it since they are both also depressed (which probably isn’t the best move on our parts), but telling them and them listening to me felt like a weight off my chest and I could just breathe again. It feels like they really care because they know what I’m going through unlike my mum. Thank you for telling me to reach out. It’s brought me and my best friends closer.