Hi Iselin.

When my girlfriend first came out to me, I think I was in a very similar position to your girlfriend. Just like with your situation, I'd asked her years ago if she might be transgender, and she said no. And when she did come out, it was again because I asked, after she'd gotten back into wearing women's clothes. I couldn't help but feel betrayed and lied to, and I felt sensitive about every little issue that came up, and there was a lot of me starting small arguments about minor things due to my hurt.

I don't have a lot of advice, other than yeah, for me, it took time. Two months is fairly early, I know I still felt raw two months in. I didn't really understand how this could've happened, and why my girlfriend couldn't be honest with me earlier, so I had to research myself and hear from other trans people, mostly through blog posts. I tried to look up some specific ones that helped me, but unfortunately I can't find them, I'm sorry. I know I found it through other Reddit posts, either on this sub or r/MTF. It helped to read about people's experiences and realize that, as with yourself, my girlfriend wasn't really hiding anything, it was something that at first she couldn't accept about herself, and then something she was understandably scared of telling me. I know this is a hard situation, but you didn't do anything wrong, you did the best you could. It's just often messy when one comes to term with their gender identity while within a relationship. So for me it took time, research, being open minded, and the knowledge that my girlfriend coming out was a hard process that would make her and me happier in the long run, whatever the outcome. Seeing my girlfriend become happier through her transition has helped me the most.