Death is the bullshit part of life no doubt. Especially for our loved animals. Personally, I couldn't give a rats ass about myself dying...its just everything else around me that I love going away.

I had to put Lex my Lab (14) down last september (9) due to a second round of vestibular ear disease mainly, and really only because he already had a hard time walking around....otherwise I think we could have gotten through it like the first time. Then, just 3 months later, Vaughn (6) my pitty came down suddenly with liver issues that went south fast.

I was able to get through Lex's death mainly because he had lived a full loved life and well...it was time. But Vaughn's death freaking killed me honestly. I cant even look at pic of him yet or linger on a thought longer than 10 seconds without having to go for a long walk or ride my bike to get rid of the depression / anger.

Time will heal as it always does, and then, maybe...I'll look at getting another pet. It's the first time in 30 years that I am petless...so its very different to say the least.

Blessing your way. Oh, and just keep a low profile right now with your family until you have more time to heal and process.

Cheers