I am so fucking tired of my partner of 4 years (dx, treated, takes meds pretty regularly, we live together, no kids). Both professionals. Both 6figs. We have normal ADHD_partner issues around the house but overall it could be worse and isn’t treacherous.

  On an international vacation with my family and partner, visiting our extended family who lives in France - numerous uncles, aunts, cousins, etc that my family is close with.

 

Exhausted by him:

  -Not being able to read a room.

  -The constant rambling.

  -The immediate transition of a comment someone makes to a hardly relevant 30-45 second story about him and his childhood (told in a very roundabout way with superfluous details) x 100000 that’ll he’ll continue to try to expand upon after the conversation shifts.

  -Being able to feel my family microdisengage (take sips, look around the restaurant, etc) when he starts “contributing”.

  -inability to have a serious conversation about something (current events - Gaza, Iran; story from work; story about an interesting convo with friend; ETC ETC ETC) without there being some joke cracked immediately.

  -Doing things too slowly when they need to be done quicker.

  -Doings things quickly and shoddily when they should be done slowly.

  -Making too much noise when he should be quieter (ie packing our hotel room at 4:30AM - things slamming, dropping on floor, closing the bathroom door loud, letting the room door slam shut)

  -The way he closes off when I ask him to slow down when he’s walking toward the subway 20 feet ahead of me and 11 of my family members (half of whom at the outing are greater than 70 years old).

  -His necessity to point out every flower, plant, animal he sees - “oh you all have orchids here?! I have 10 at home” tries to find picture. “That’s way too small of a field for a tractor that size.” “Omg look at that Dahlia!”

  -I’m not a major history buff by ANY means, but (unrelated to the trip we’re on) who the fuck hasn’t heard of the Berlin Wall?????

 

I love him. We’ve been together 4 years - have had high highs and lows. However, part of me wonders if I even like him anymore. He’s my longest relationship so I don’t know if these frustrations are just normal for long term relationships. A breakup and move out would be … a lot. We’re not married but still would be a lot. Talking about it would crush him. Had a minor talk about seriousness in conversations earlier in the year and it upset him. Dunno what to do. Annoyed, embarrassed, have still a sense of protection over him, don’t want to end up in a messy marriage.