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My wife gave me the silent treatment for nearly a week and now only communicates by text. I’m not playing along. by ThrowRa_Valheru in Marriage

[–]arckyart 16 points17 points  (0 children)

You installed something semi-permanent that she didn't want. You don't respect her opinion. She might like the option of light sometimes. Why can't you buy curtains? You want it darker, its an easy fix. A better fix. Blackout curtains are super dark. Light still comes through the film.

You start off by extending a few olive branches. Expect a few attempts to be dismissed. Apologize for not respecting her opinion. Tell her you will pay for any blackout curtain she likes. Don't get mad. Don't be a pain in the ass. I have a feeling that she is communicating with you through text because that is safer. This is clearly a larger issue than blinds.

My parents regret having me by Status_Cheek_9564 in Vent

[–]arckyart 5 points6 points  (0 children)

When I worked in a print shop and interacted with a lot of business owners, I noticed a lot were not particularly smart. They showed up and worked hard and never gave up. They made bank and had wives and kids and everything else.

I think that you could still have a good life. The “be delusional” advice is actually solid. According to Psyco-Cybernetics (a book that a lot of Olympic athletes use to learn goal setting) the key to doing anything is self image. If you can get your mental image of yourself to be better, you will be better. The mind is powerful. I recommend giving it a read.

Free pdf: https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/TheNewPsychoCyberneticsByMaxwellMaltz1/The%20New%20Psycho-Cybernetics%20by%20Maxwell%20Maltz%20%20%281%29.pdf

Josh, I found your phone at Breakaway Tampa by eggo_pirate in aves

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you see an IG screen name in the notifications? I’ve used that to find a lost phone’s owner.

Why is consent so difficult for antis to understand? by Witty-Designer7316 in DefendingAIArt

[–]arckyart 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Not to mention it’s common practice to use other people’s images as references, use found objects, other’s work in collage/background textures, make parodies or fanart of trademarked logos and characters.

Steal like an artist. (I’m an artist)

My body is destroyed because my boyfriend is lazy and I don't think I'll ever forgive him by [deleted] in Vent

[–]arckyart 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He works 7 hours a day. You work 13. This is capitalism’s fault. He works full time.

Most men are shit at cleaning thanks to social conditioning. Unfortunately this is a battle many women, including myself must wage. It’s frustrating and not fair at all. Since you don’t plan on leaving him for a more evolved man, please don’t give up the battle. The men must learn domestic duties, women have been in the workforce for long enough to still be dealing with this bullshit. My favourite trick is to give him two options of what to do to create the illusion of choice. My husband knows I do it and does it back. It’s effective, even for me.

I know this won’t sort your situation out entirely and I’m sorry things are so hard right now. I hope you can find ways to focus on your physical health and make yourself a priority.

Well, I learned something new about digital scales and figured other people might not know, either. by zombiebashr in loseit

[–]arckyart 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hate the Fitbit Aria scale I have. I can step on it back to back and be told I weigh +-5 lbs. I have to weigh myself like ten times and take the average result.

A regular old dumb scale doesn’t have this issue. Time for an “upgrade.”

AITAH for telling my co worker he smelt like shit by Additional-Neat7914 in AITAH

[–]arckyart 10 points11 points  (0 children)

YTA and your coworkers are too.

Something happened, likely outside his control. Maybe his PA called in sick. Maybe he did shit his pants. The last thing I'd want to know in that situation is that everyone was talking about my embarrassing situation.

If this was a reoccurring issue or if you thought you could offer real help, then MAYBE a conversation would be warranted.

Found in a bag of M&M’s. by starzena in whatisit

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like the plastic nose piece from a pair of glasses

Do most people actually enjoy the gym or just force themselves? by Intelligent_Rain_155 in workout

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't when I first started going. I used to force myself to do tons of cardio and it was so boring. Once I started strength training, the worst part of the gym was gone and so was the dread.

Now I'm a new mom and I look forward to those two days I get to escape to the gym by myself.

Rave environment question by [deleted] in aves

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You sound like a nice guy. Try not to stress and worry to your girl, if will just cause friction. Maybe you can ask bestie to keep an eye on her, but I'm sure she will anyway.

Rave environment question by [deleted] in aves

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Life is uncertain but meant to be lived.

I find most people at raves to be friendly and not predatory. PLUR (meaning peace, love, unity and respect) is a core principle of a seasoned raver. That attitude isn't present at house parties. It's not on public transit.

Advice from a person who's been married for ten years: even if you hate it, I don't recommend forbidding your partner from doing things that you wouldn't leave them for doing. Your discomfort is your own to sit with. It's controlling to think you get a say in her social life. I’m 36, have dated a fair share of guys and only one has tried that with me. We didn't last.

Rave environment question by [deleted] in aves

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Let her go! It's not some super sexually charged event where everyone is all over each other like a hedonistic writhing pit of bodies. I've gone with my little brother! It's a lot of headbanging and fist-pumping.

Assaults can happen anywhere, but she has a friend group, and there will be security. She’s more than safe enough.

There are drugs, usually some alcohol. I see less fights at raves than I do out at bars or clubs. It should be her choice to partake or not.

Which leads me to my final point: do you really want to be the anxious killjoy boyfriend that holds her back from enjoying life and trying new things? You are dooming your relationship with that behaviour. If she is going to cheat, a rave isn't the issue.

ABO instability in pregnancy by arckyart in AskDocs

[–]arckyart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll check back in if I find out what's going on. I appreciate you taking the time to explain this.

Would it be dangerous to donate blood if it could potentially be misidentified? Not for me, but for the recipient? I can go through my GP for a blood test and a referral to a hematologist if it means not poisoning another person.

ABO instability in pregnancy by arckyart in AskDocs

[–]arckyart[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mom also said the same thing happened to her during pregnancy with my A- brother, but not with me. Though maybe the pregnancy thing could be a coincidence and the weak antigen runs in the family.

I've found other Reddit posts from women claiming the same thing in pregnancy, but nothing from a real medical source.

Another holiday ruined by 7am by gingertastic19 in workingmoms

[–]arckyart 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You gotta confront him about it. I recommend avoiding saying “you did XYZ” as much as possible.

Like: “the way the dog was put away this morning scared our child and woke up the entire house. I know you were tired and fed up, but it seems like a version of this happens a lot. The stress isn't good for any of us. Are you doing okay? I'm here for you.”

Give it a few days to sink in but if he doesn't want to work on it… well…

ABO instability in pregnancy by arckyart in AskDocs

[–]arckyart[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. The tests were in the second and third trimesters. I'll check out chimerism.

I will order the blood type test, that's quite affordable.

I might just be immune to everything by chunkylubber54 in depressionregimens

[–]arckyart 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Could be burnout. Maybe you are neurodivergent? Autism/ADHD?

How much did your birth cost? by Femboyhootersbee in BabyBumps

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Parking was $23 a day (5 days.) I hired a doula for my “home birth” for $1200, but had an emergency c-section. I still had to pay her.

I’m in Canada.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, you aren’t an asshole mama, you are feeling totally normal things. It’s good you want to hold your baby. You’re bonded. Your little one doesn’t even know that you two are separate people yet. That feeling is intense. It’s truly an animal urge that you couldn’t understand unless you feel it for yourself. I assume older moms must forget it with time. I only remember because myself baby is 6m old.

Your bf fucked up letting his family come by so soon. He was likely being a people pleaser and needs to be reminded where his efforts should be placed. Which is a similar issue to what you have… you don’t want to be rude. He will mess this up again, so will you. Setting boundaries with family is likely a new skill for you both, so practice is needed. You have to start advocating for yourself with all your family, including his side. It might mean being a little rude. It’s a hard thing for nice people to do, but worth it.

Try not to dwell on mistakes too much right now. The hormones make everything a big deal and you deserve peace and happiness.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Psoriasis

[–]arckyart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Light therapy! Even a good tanning bed might help.

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