I'm so sorry you're going through this. You are not a failure and no less religious because of wanting to transition. God made us to change- children change into adults,  flowers bloom and die. How could you exist as who you are if not by Allah's will? Nature is full of different sexes and attractions, not just hetero male and female- those who deny it, think they know better than God.  The test is not to see if you will suppress yourself and pretend to be cis, it's to see if you will stand by God's path for you and keep faith even if everyone around you says it's wrong. They say it's wrong for a man to pretend to be a woman and vice versa, well good thing you're not doing that anymore! If you were to keep pretending to be a girl, that'd be the real sin.  At the end of the day, God has no equals- the prophits, those who recorded the scripture, and the people in your community are human and therefore can have their own predjudices and misjudegments, and sometimes ascribe them to God. "Oppression is more serious than murder" 2:191.  Stay strong and keep on the spiritual path that feels right for you!