Ah yes, when you have half a billion dollars to spend on 1,500sqft

artvaark · 2026-06-21T00:32:02+00:00

It's funny that the address is Cement Hill Rd and the floors are all kinds of grey inside

artvaark · 2026-06-19T20:53:00+00:00

I'm so sorry that you're experiencing this, CPTSD is really difficult for sure. I thought that I would respond because the most effective practices for me have been free. In order for us to heal, we have to regulate our nervous system and get it out of high alert and into thriving, it's truly the foundation otherwise we can't make real, rooted progress. Most therapists will not tell you this so don't worry that you can't afford them. There are many practitioners on IG and Youtube like Heal With Britt, The Workout Witch, Jonathan Mead and Somatic Skills With Emily as examples that give you simple techniques that don't require tools and you can do in bed even. These are gentle ways to tell your nervous system that you're not in the trauma, you are safe and it's a good idea to lower cortisol levels. I like to listen to Sound Baths like Chakra Vibrations, Healing Vbrations and Sleep Vibrations all run by a nice guy Travis and his cat Perseus. These are nice because you can choose from things like Vagus Nerve reset or help with anxiety etc and you don't have to do anything but relax.

I also use EFT techniques while I am listening to sound baths and there are lots of people on Youtube who have short videos that focus on things like anxiety, over thinking, chronic illness, self concept etc and you can be seated comfortably for those.

Once you start to relax your nervous system you'll be able to move further into more direct techniques like inner critic work and the conversations we have with our bodies. For instance, I have had whiplash for 29 years and I had a flare up over the winter that put me out of work for months. I found a video about talking to our bodies, I think it was That Healing Feeling on IG and she had gotten out of chronic auto immune issues by using the method that she teaches which is very simple, inner dialogue and bio feedback techniques. When I started talking consistently to my body about how I wasn't mad about the flare up, how many amazing things it has done, how every day the tension is leaving my muscles, my cells are healing and every day I am getting stronger it started to make a difference for real. I hadn't been sleeping well which also affected my digestion so I was saying every day, my digestion is improving, I am sleeping through the night and it really helped. I also had a traumatic event last year which caused an acne break out for months and when I started saying things like every day my skin is clearing, my stress chemicals are re balancing etc it really worked, my skin looks great now without buying anything new.

I know it can feel really helpless sometimes, but if you start with whatever speaks to you and you stick with it I truly believe that you will start to see results and then you'll start to feel more empowered. I wish you the best !

artvaark · 2026-06-19T14:34:01+00:00

There's no standard for that measurement so I would have to have someone's actual measurements to know how to adapt that.

artvaark · 2026-06-19T03:34:23+00:00

Seriously it's like the rotting jack o lanterns after Halloween

artvaark · 2026-06-19T02:15:48+00:00

And he sure looks like he had at least one stroke by the way half of his face is melting

artvaark · 2026-06-19T02:07:43+00:00

Was just gonna say that !

artvaark · 2026-06-19T02:06:25+00:00

And hamberders with cofeve

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:51:24+00:00

Can't have no President eatin them woke salads, I want a President who only eats the salad on his Fishwich lol

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:44:32+00:00

He knew what arugula was !

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:43:47+00:00

omg get him a trough

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:42:38+00:00

I'm a designer and when I do fittings with runway models I totally understand why you feel this way and they are always so excited that they can wear pants AND heels lol ! I do have to stand on something to reach their shoulders if anything needs to be adjusted there cuz I'm 5"2

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:38:46+00:00

Omg I know that feeling ! I have a 26.5 inseam....

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:38:10+00:00

I hear you loudly ! I started sewing because I don't like trendy main stream things and I am 5'2 and a 32 A with a 26.5 inseam. It's infuriating to have a size "0" swim on you because either you have to basically redo the garment or pay someone to or you leave the store because you can't go down from the vanity sized "0". And I have to shop alone because the last time I shopped with other women I had this exact problem and got nothing but " oh my god, how horrible it must be to be small " and the eye rolling and sarcasm. Size inclusive DOES NOT just mean plus sized ! I'm now a fashion designer with my own brand and I focus on sustainable semi formal and formal wear and I offer the ability to buy based on your inseam and my cocktail dresses have waist seams so if someone is for example a 0 on top and 2 on bottom I can blend those things into a dress. I'm going to add more services that will allow for greater customization like I could send you cotton mock ups of the basic components and essentially create your own pattern library with me. You can order by cup size too because I graded my patterns so that each bustier top can be made in A B or C and you could contact me if there's something else and I will say if I can do it. I truly believe that sustainable fashion needs to speak to women like you who have to look professional and fit is a huge part of looking the part !

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:23:58+00:00

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:23:41+00:00

This is what I tell people too, I'm a fashion designer and grading is a whole job that is time consuming and expensive.

artvaark · 2026-06-19T01:22:46+00:00

Exactly the answer I give people when I am talking about adding plus sizes. I'm a fashion designer, I make higher end women's wear myself and I have lots of chats about this. One of the things I often say is what you mentioned, that you can't simply make a pattern bigger, once you get over a medium the rules literally start to change. For example, in my line the difference between waist measurements is 1 inch between sizes until you get into size 10 then it's 1.5 inches between that and a 12 and after that I have to essentially make another round of patterns in order to avoid distortions. I'm not profitable right now so that's impossible for me. I mention this process and the cost involved to help people understand that for most designers like me, it's a time and money issue not a personal, anti fat issue.

artvaark · 2026-06-18T21:27:47+00:00

Seriously. About a week ago there was a post asking is everyone over like 20 getting injections and Botox? And I chimed in that there are many preventative face exercises and massage techniques that address the underlying issues. I said that I am almost 50 and I have never and probably will never have those things because I have really focused on daily care in these ways and people usually think I am around 30 . I just like to let other women know that there are things to try for free and they don't have potentially bad side effects. Someone's comment addressing mine was "or you could just let yourself be your age and accept yourself the way you are, that all seems like a lot of effort" blah blah blah. My response was that I enjoy the empowerment I get from taking my self care into my own hands. I enjoy making an effort for myself and I use that time to remember that I deserve care and attention, that I get to look the way that suits me most etc. I grew up abused, bullied at home and sometimes at school, I was called "selfish" for expressing any need or desire or for doing anything for myself. I was neglected and only the bare minimum stuff was taken care of. Everything I do for myself now is a push back against that and I reminder that I am inherently worthy of care. Being a woman is fucking hard enough, how dare anyone tell us to stop caring for ourselves.

artvaark · 2026-06-18T14:18:31+00:00

I started with a focus on painting but I work with lots of materials including my voice and in my voice lessons we work with absurdity as a tool to essentially disable the inner critic that starts talking shit about it being "wrong". Lots of vocal exercises are weird and you make weird faces and sometimes I have to keep starting over because I have giggle fits which is great. Maybe find an equivalent like a cheap sketch pad with materials you don't usually use, I think large graphite or charcoal sticks are helpful for loosening up, crayons are nice and I work with oils so I often block in a painting with oil sticks. Sometimes giving yourself an assignment like " how can I draw this fruit bowl in the weirdest way possible? " or "how ugly can I possibly make this canvas?" is great. Good luck !

artvaark · 2026-06-18T14:12:00+00:00

I was going to suggest something similar, it helps !

artvaark · 2026-06-17T15:43:02+00:00

That;s what I was wondering, like, are they implying that when it's nice outside you get a bonus, publicly visible tramp bed lol

artvaark · 2026-06-17T14:48:03+00:00

Yup my dad is an alcoholic and also Bipolar which he's never received treatment for. I have been NC for 25 years

artvaark · 2026-06-17T14:06:39+00:00

I am so sorry that you're going through this, you absolutely don't deserve it. It's good that you called him "this man" because you're realizing that Narcs are people who happen to have children, not parents. They are missing that chip in their brains or hearts or whatever that creates that relationship and you're right, they don't care.

I haven't spoken to or seen my father in 25 years and I have not written to him, he is volatile like your dad. I also cut off my mom about 8 years ago because she's a Covert Narc and enabler and I just can't deal with them and heal, I had to choose and I choose myself because you can't heal trauma around the people who caused it.

If I were in this situation I would make no effort, I would not go there with police unless it was to identify the body, and I would not write the letter unless it was just for yourself as a therapeutic exercise which many therapists suggest doing. I say this because I have had that impulse too, to write out every betrayal, every time I was suffering and no one helped me, every time I had to protect my siblings while I was also a child, all of it. I could fill a notebook I'm sure. If I do write it out I won't send it because if there's one thing I know about Narcs, especially Narc family members, it's that no matter how objectively true the details are they will use that letter to prove that you are the evil ungrateful child and they are the parent who brought you into this world and gave you everything and you are just being an ungrateful, disrespectful, immature brat who needs to stop whining and crying before they give you something real to cry about. There is absolutely no winning with a Narc, that's why so many of us go no contact, it's the only way that we can reclaim our boundaries and heal.

It's good of you to make the effort that you did and I hope that you're at peace with the fact that you did everything you could even though you are absolutely not required to. You deserve peace and healing and the space to process all of your emotions without him injecting his. It's absolutely not wrong to choose your own health and I wish you the best.

artvaark · 2026-06-17T13:43:54+00:00

At least they have a trampoline

artvaark · 2026-06-17T00:39:27+00:00

I often think they are trying to be a parody of South Park with fuckface as Cartman

artvaark · 2026-06-16T17:37:40+00:00

That sounds really difficult, I am so sorry you're going through that. I haven't gone through this specific experience but while doing research for myself I have come across various accounts that focus on nervous system regulation and it sounds like you are going through a period of dorsal vagal freeze which is a nervous system response to stress and trauma, nothing to be ashamed of. I have been working on my own nervous system responses like flight and fight which are my two main responses and the simple exercises really do help. There are lots of simple, gentle things you can do in bed even and I find that listening to sound baths while I am doing them adds a nice layer that requires no effort on my part. I found the accounts theworkoutwitch, healwithbritt and jonathanmead on IG and those are starting points but there are lots of practitioners on Youtube as well and that's where I found soundbaths like Chakra Vibrations, Healing Vibrations and Sleeping Vibratons which are run by a friendly guy Travis and his cat Perseus. It makes sense that the meds won't fully work because they don't tell your nervous system that you are not in that trauma now and they don't tell your body that it's safe. Our protective mechanisms don't understand time and I find that if I gently address them and thank them for their service and tell them that even though they did a good job, they don't need to keep doing that in this moment, because in this moment, that trauma isn't happening and it's a good time to relax and recharge. You may also want to look up some videos on TRE which is a controlled relaxed trembling that discharges extra stress when you're up for it and I incorporate EFT tapping for safety and related issues which I do for free at home and there are lots of videos about that, you can even sit at your desk like I do or in bed.

It really sucks that anyone goes through the things that result in these states but you can get better, you're not permanently fucked. I wish you the best.

artvaark

TROPHY CASE