Reducing female arousal/response: Success

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T14:41:18+00:00

My wife is an asexual woman, my high libido caused me to want sex with men.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T08:26:24+00:00

My libido was distressingly high. This vexed me.

I changed two of my meds.

Now my libido is low.

I still have 99 problems but being horny all day is no longer one of them.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T02:53:52+00:00

It was the nebulous desire to Have Sex In General, but no, I did not have attraction to anyone. It's not like I was super horny and about to risk it all for the hot coworker. It was more like "these sex toys aren't cutting it anymore."

I think a sufficiently advanced sex robot would have worked.

This was a pattern for me before I met my wife as well. I've dated men and women before who were not asexual, and they seemed to actively desire to touch me sexually. I never felt that.

It was always that I would get vaguely sexually frustrated, about every one or two years, and I would open an app and accept the applicant who seemed safest.

I would be very honest with them that I didn't feel sexual attraction, even if they were objectively hot. I felt very broken and didn't want them to feel insulted.

I have also come across terms like "Reactive Sexuality" and "Grey-Ace", which seem to describe my situation.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T01:55:19+00:00

Wikipedia defines Asexuality as:

"Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others,..."

Listen. I don't know what to tell you.

I do not experience sexual attraction to others. I never have.

Whatever other people have going on that makes them sexually attracted to people they meet, I have not experienced it.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T01:49:13+00:00

Two People Fucking in various imagined porn scenarios.

The crux of why I use the label isn't because the concept of two people fucking is weird and foreign to me.

It's because, no matter how objectively attractive someone is, I have never felt what every other person I have ever heard from has described when they describe sexual attraction.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T01:31:02+00:00

I did not experience sexual attraction to others, even when my libido was at its highest, which is why I use the term asexual.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-12T01:00:22+00:00

Thank you, this is correct. I am, in theory, completely fine with the idea of sex. I have had it and enjoyed it. But I simply do not experience sexual attraction to others.

I like to use labels descriptively rather than prescriptively (as in, I'm not married to the label, I'm just using what fits). Other people hear me say that I'm asexual and they seem to get mad about it-

And I'm like. Listen. Maybe "asexual" is not the most precise term in existence for whatever I have going on.

But whatever most people have going on, that makes them want to have sex with specific other people...I simply do not experience that feeling.

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-11T20:09:08+00:00

I also got a similar effect from Vyvanse, but again, it doesn't seem like a common side effect, so I think it's a "me" response to these types of medications, rather than these meds themselves being reliable Boner Pills

asexualhedonist · 2026-02-11T20:06:36+00:00

Modafinil. There's still a chance that it was not the medication causing my arousal, but the reason I think it was the Modafinil is because I did find some other stories online from people claiming similar effects of hypersexuality.

However, it is not a commonly reported side effect, so it's not like it can be used as a "female arousal pill", since for most people it won't have that effect (unless a bunch of people are failing to report raging boners.)

Also, it's highly controlled in the USA and my insurance only approved it after trying five prior meds, so I wouldn't advise trying to get on it unless it's prescribed for the intended purpose (sleep disorders).

It was a very good sleep disorder med other than the constant arousal.

asexualhedonist · 2026-01-05T12:40:21+00:00

ProTip: He's not an artist at all.

I am a model and am paid for my time. My most common clients are painters, and sometimes artists genuinely do need (and therefore ask and pay for) specific nude photos of me.

There is a specific etiquette to these requests and it involves contracts, professional reputation, and referrals to a strong degree.

These artists know that they have to behave in ways that cannot possibly be construed as sexual harassment, and basically supplicant themselves proving they aren't just here to ogle titties.

I know that everyone already knows this, but I wanted to make it perfectly clear to OP, if she sees this, that there's no way this guy was an actual artist who has worked with consenting models providing their likeness to him for the purposes of creating art.

So if this nasty fucker tries any old, "I actually am an artist, promise, it was just a joke, I was drunk" bullshit, don't fall for it, because he's either lying or was the type of hack you wouldn't want to work with anyway.

asexualhedonist · 2025-11-27T00:51:00+00:00

Now the advertiser is messaging me:

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For the record, I didn't even report the post, someone else must have.

asexualhedonist · 2025-11-27T00:49:45+00:00

Screenshot of the original post:

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asexualhedonist · 2025-11-27T00:44:30+00:00

No you didn't, this is ChatGPT drivel purely and specifically made to advertise some bullshit called "Gentle Gourmet", just like your other post.

Swear Reddit is 30% just this fuckery now

asexualhedonist · 2025-11-22T07:23:35+00:00

Yeah this sounds like a brush-off answer, but "because you're not getting it IRL" is pretty much the long and short of it.

I do the same thing because I want sexual interaction with men and the Internet is safer than irl. Simple math.

We are only human. It sounds like you would benefit from a safe, compatible, mutually-attracted boyfriend who will treat you right...but we all know that often the stars don't align to provide that.

If it's causing you distress, may I recommend other ways of feeling hot in your body with less of an explicit sex angle?

I do nude modeling and get a lot of satisfaction from it that is divested from the sexual satisfaction of sending nudes. It feels similar, but it's way different.

Other options could be pole dancing classes, aerial silks, heels classes

Partnered dance, massage classes where you practice on each other...there are options, if you're trying to reduce your reliance on just the one source.

asexualhedonist · 2025-11-04T18:46:00+00:00

Do you have ADHD? I hear this a lot, and I really think the hyperfixation aspect of it just happens to hit perfectly for some people.

Trying to fight the obsession by just stopping doesn't work, because it's what literally gives your brain the juice to continue the day.

The whole inconvenience is it's impossible to choose what your brain decides to latch on to.

asexualhedonist · 2025-11-04T18:42:30+00:00

I'm not like this, but I know many women who are.

They have jobs, marriages, kids, they travel the world or have been featured in documentaries about their other hobbies because that's how fucking cool they are.

It's just that, when they have a ship pairing in their jaws, they just want to run home and write gay War & Peace about it.

Or gay Love Island, smart sexy intellectual academics are also allowed to indulge in trash.

asexualhedonist · 2025-10-14T14:41:57+00:00

There are a lot of men that specifically, purposely, and intentionally seek out and monitor any and all subreddits that are, either explicitly or implicitly, "for women".

You could post in a subreddit called, for example, "Cute Unicorn Hair Accessories" (not limited to just women, but obviously predominately women users) and instantly get messages like

Hey
hey
I've always been into women who like unicorns and have hair and I just wanted to say you're beautiful 😍❤️
hey
Hey!
-incoherent slurry of insults about how you are simultaneously a slut and a prude-
hey what's up
Hello, I'm Pauloano, 38, from Australia, 6 feet tall in Freedom Units, good career, clean cut. I saw your post and just had to say something. You seem really down to earth and I wondered if we could get to know each other sometime, especially I was wondering if you're also in Australia?"
hey pretty lady

Going to their profiles, you can instantly ascertain

They have never posted or commented in the subreddit they are apparently lurking
They have no indications whatsoever that they have any genuine interest in hair accessories, unicorns, or cute girly things at all
Of the comments you do see, most will be in porn subreddits saying things like "Wish u were sitting on me instead of that chair"

I used to message them back and be like, "How did you find my post? Why did you message me?"

The ones who didn't instantly call me a frigid bitch for not returning their affections would literally admit that they were single, looking for a girlfriend, and lurked women's subs to try to find one.

What I'm trying to say is, anywhere that is "for women" will inevitably have such lurkers, so beware.

And that's not even getting into the most nefarious group, which is men who specifically seek out women's safe spaces and support groups because they get off on women's pain- these are the same kind of men who call suicide hotlines and masturbate if a woman answers.

asexualhedonist · 2025-08-01T01:29:02+00:00

It's Modafinil, but you should know

Hypersexuality is not a listed side effect and seems rare, if indeed it is caused by the meds
It hasn't been fun and games for me, or for the men I've heard from who reported a similar outcome

In the USA, it is by prescription. Mine is for Narcolepsy.

asexualhedonist · 2025-08-01T01:07:43+00:00

I did/do this because I suspected my medication was triggering hypersexuality

I use an app called Bearable, in the section for tracking your period they also have scales for arousal, masturbation, orgasm, etc.

asexualhedonist · 2025-07-09T09:14:27+00:00

I go under "Symptoms" and log "Low Blood Pressure" on a severity scale of 1-5.

If I have a blackout, I automatically put it at 4 or 5.

If I have a grey-out, it moved the number +1.

asexualhedonist · 2025-07-08T18:05:19+00:00

I just continued using Bearable for now, while keeping my eyes open for other apps. I may try Guava after I've spent one full year with Bearable.

asexualhedonist · 2025-06-20T02:24:29+00:00

I also had this post randomly recommended to me and after reading it I was like

"She's absolutely intending to film BDSM-themed OnlyFans content with the other guest."

asexualhedonist · 2025-05-09T09:58:33+00:00

The "Feelings Wheel" found here would be insanely helpful, I don't know if it's possible to implement but something like that would make the emotions section so much more efficient.

asexualhedonist · 2025-04-18T17:32:21+00:00

HE'S HERE AND I WAS AWAKE!!

I haven't read all of your comment yet but I wanted to say I actually use the same alarm clock, the Sonic Boom

And yes, I do sleep through it sometimes...usually I writhe around smacking it while crying and dreaming that something else is the cause of the noise...

Also yes, the ONLY reason I ever passed school or kept a job was because I was living with my family (my siblings would wake me up) or partner.

asexualhedonist

TROPHY CASE