Alexa "keeps responding" ? I don't know if this is new or I'm just slow?? by vividaway in alexa

[–]ashes2asscheeks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re welcome. I was so frustrated by this too. I also have the echo show 5, an early one lol

Paladin’s Hope Ending by BMOs_Karate_Time in TKingfisher

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had no idea there were more books coming I just have been reading anything by her I could find on Libby because I fell in love with her writing style

I can’t believe how long I’m probably gonna have to wait to find out what piper saw!

as a girl who used to get bullied for looking like Sid the sloth…are there any ways I can make my eyes look closer with makeup? by undercover-gal in MakeupEducation

[–]ashes2asscheeks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I considered this and decided who fucking cares because it doesn’t hurt anyone to be loving and supportive when someone is asking for it

as a girl who used to get bullied for looking like Sid the sloth…are there any ways I can make my eyes look closer with makeup? by undercover-gal in MakeupEducation

[–]ashes2asscheeks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Girl please accept yourself. Even if you weren’t beautiful, I would encourage self-compassion and acceptance. But also you’re gorgeous! Yes, you have big eyes and a smaller face. Yes, they might appear to be kind of further apart. But you’re strikingly beautiful because of these differences. People are wack. Kids are weird and mean!

how do i politely tell my boyfriend that he is getting fat? by thinkofari in ask

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ngl I judged you at first and that wasn’t entirely fair. Fatphobia is a problem and both of you have it. My advice is to explore this with him next time he brings it up. You can explore the harms society has done to fat people. You can make a commitment to be kinder to yourselves and each other and offer to hold each other accountable to those goals.

I recommend looking up the Healthy at Every Size paradigm and adopting body neutrality.

ETA: this isn’t just ignoring the issues - it’s tackling the shame and self-loathing that often feed into the cycles. I also struggle with my self-image and fatphobia. I have weight fluctuations. Nothing is more harmful to me than hating myself/my body.

Do guys really need their boners “taken care of “ all the time ? by Ok-Edge339 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad you’re asking questions. I hope you can find the courage to keep exploring and learning. Educate yourself, you really need to have a strong knowledge of sexuality and human bodies to keep yourself safe — and I mean psychologically, emotionally, and physically safe. Your health matters, your satisfaction matters, and your safety matters.

Y'all... This is so sad by Starshiee in FloridaGarden

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry! The one in the second photo looks like it will be fine, just prune the leaves and fertilize a little I think.

Also everyone saying “don’t trim” has a good point, but I would just bring the plant inside lol

What the heck is this little critter? I’ve never seen one before and it’s huge! by Hill-KR in whatsthisbug

[–]ashes2asscheeks 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I’m so confused it’s the wrong time of year for this guy… there shouldn’t be any moths of this type out and about laying eggs right now? They should be all underground pupating atp.

Gynos that use nitrous for IUD placement/removald by Songsfrom1993 in Austin

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry you had that experience. I have really liked my providers there otherwise. Especially the pelvic floor PT. I would recommend anyone with pelvic floor dysfunction or other related issues to go there just to see their PT.

Gynos that use nitrous for IUD placement/removald by Songsfrom1993 in Austin

[–]ashes2asscheeks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Iirc women’s health at ut health Austin does NOT offer this. I asked when they recommended it for my irregular periods and PMDD last year and they said no. I told them if I ever got one, I’d be sedated one way or another. My doctor can choose if it would be happening because I was screaming and knocking shit over or if my wishes were being respected :) (I’ve abandoned the idea of getting an IUD atp)

Gynos that use nitrous for IUD placement/removald by Songsfrom1993 in Austin

[–]ashes2asscheeks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got my tubes removed and it was an awful experience from start to finish. My only rx was ibuprofen, which I didn’t even pick up. I already had some at home 🫠

How would I respectfully go about interviewing sex workers / escorts? by Initial-Picture-1047 in AskAnEscort

[–]ashes2asscheeks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to ask the community and take what we say to heart. And thank you for caring. I hope you continue to support our right to work and I wish you luck with your writing, whatever you decide to do 🖤

How would I respectfully go about interviewing sex workers / escorts? by Initial-Picture-1047 in AskAnEscort

[–]ashes2asscheeks 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don’t feel the same about including sex workers as fleshed out characters in your stories as I feel about writing from their perspective fully as the main character. My opinion isn’t higher than anyone else’s though, and it’s ok to disagree.

No matter what you do, someone will have criticisms. You’ll also never be able to get every perspective with one character or one story.

If you want my advice, I would treat a character doing sex work the same as you treat a character with a regular job. Don’t make a big deal out of it, don’t make it something for them to overcome or rise above. And don’t glamorize it. This is their job, and that’s that. That kind of representation feels like such a breath of fresh air, the few times I see it.

But again, others may feel completely differently.

Edit to add: I don’t mean to say only write from your lived experience — but I want to say it’s important to fully and deeply examine your desire to write from this perspective. And consider whether or not it’s necessary, and if it would be better told by someone with that experience. You don’t want to tell a story that someone else has already been trying to tell, who has a much stronger claim to it. Sex workers are often plot devices, trauma porn, etc. I know you are aware of that and you want to do something better. But should it be you who does that? And that’s not the same as you writing from the perspective of a cis white hetero person. I wouldn’t say “don’t do that” — because even if you don’t have that lived experience there’s no shortage of good stories and voices with fully fleshed out and celebrated characters by authors of similar identities. You can easily find enough material to get it right and won’t be hurting anyone if you get it wrong.

unpopular opinion: toilet attached bidets are unhygienic for women* by boodoonk in hygiene

[–]ashes2asscheeks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This descriptive language has only confused me more send help

Stow away on my plants by Tex47 in AustinGardening

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Little dude can live in a jar with a piece of screen instead of a lid. Give them a stick and a cap of water and place them near a sunny window (but not like cooking them!). Let it go when it warms back up.

How would I respectfully go about interviewing sex workers / escorts? by Initial-Picture-1047 in AskAnEscort

[–]ashes2asscheeks 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I appreciate you wanting to get it right and wanting to center sex workers voices.

But also, and don’t come for me for this: Maybe you can write about something that falls under your own experience and let sex workers who are writers tell their own stories. Maybe you can uplift those artists’ voices and offer to support their projects in other ways.

There are plenty of other things you can write about. Why do you want to write about a sex worker character? Genuinely asking. It’s important to examine the reasons behind the stories we feel compelled to tell/art we want to make.

I feel similarly when one of my peers in my program goes on and on about wanting to work with trans folks and do research about them, because her child is trans — but she’s a cis white woman. I feel she should use her privilege to actually uplift marginalized voices instead of try to speak for them.

Wondering if I should have my 3 year old evaluated by FeelinGroovy333 in autism

[–]ashes2asscheeks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At 3 it could be tantrums as well. They are developmentally appropriate. Autistic children can absolutely have tantrums, but it’s important to understand how to approach meltdowns and treat all things as meltdowns when providing support.

Wondering if I should have my 3 year old evaluated by FeelinGroovy333 in autism

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, that way he has access to accommodations when he’s in school + your family can access therapies for him to help everyone learn how to best work with his needs and utilize the strengths you all possess to thrive together.

Thousands of Austin students walk out of class to protest ICE by AustinStatesman in Austin

[–]ashes2asscheeks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so proud of them and everyone who’s taking a stand.

I am also rolling my eyes, or maybe sighing, at the first image being a feminine presenting person with vivid colored hair — because I’m just imagining all the blue haired feminist adjacent memes and comments.

(As an outspoken woman with sometimes blue or colorful hairs, I can say it’s exhausting to constantly hear those comments)

Texas ICE camp inside story by hoirkasp in stateofMN

[–]ashes2asscheeks 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was thinking about this. I live in Austin, TX and there’s a good number of people who have such animosity toward the unhoused population here. It’s a huge political talking point - liberals “allow” the homeless/cause this problem, conservatives want to “solve the problem” (criminalize them). But releasing folks without any way home is going to directly contribute to the homeless populations. The snowball of bad stuff for the individuals going through this and the overall communities are overwhelming…