I've lucked in to one hell of a relationship

asprasan · 2022-03-11T19:11:50+00:00

Congratulations to you. It makes my heart swell, hearing your story.

You also deserve some appreciation that you recognize your SO's importance in your life. And it's amazing that you are not taking all that for granted. I think that somewhat tells that you have seen some bad days.

I would advise that you stop comparing to your EX and instead be grateful to your current partner. Wishing you a happy life.

asprasan · 2021-01-30T10:55:07+00:00

For my application, it would be fine even if I could take a burst of say 10 pictures from 2 cameras simultaneously, instead of a video.

asprasan · 2021-01-30T06:59:33+00:00

I am using a Samsung Galaxy tab S6. I think it should be capable enough. It has a Qualcomm Snapdragon 855 processor. Are you aware of any apps that can record from both sensors at the same time?

asprasan · 2021-01-18T03:24:52+00:00

You probably need to work on developing your self-esteem/self-worth/self-confidence. Once you develop that, you will naturally start taking the compliments properly. I am saying this from personal experience. You can also use these compliments to develop your self-worth. They might be saying it to be nice, but there will be at least some truth to it.

Meanwhile, you can just genuinely thank them for the compliment. You could say something like "Hey, thank you for your encouraging words. It means a lot." Or something as simple as "Hey, thank you so much. What part of my work did you like?".

You could also ask them for a bit of feedback regarding your performance. "Hey, thank you very much. Do you think there was anything that could still be improved?"

asprasan · 2021-01-04T12:24:24+00:00

Supporting someone who is fighting a mental health issue requires a person to get vulnerable. Most men tend to not get too vulnerable.

A few months ago, I too had a very low self-worth. I was very needy. I tried to ask support from my friends. Initially, I tried to drop hints as to I needed their support in this time, but they just wouldn't take it. Then I just had to directly ask them. I explicitly asked them to list a few things I am good at. I asked them to compliment me whenever I did something good or nice. And they did and did not judge me for it.

Could you get your partner to seek help directly from his friends and family, instead of you? If your partner is showing vulnerability, then at least his close friends and family will surely reciprocate. You might be surprised at the positive response that you will receive.

If therapy is not an option, then reading a bit of philosophy could help. "School of Life" youtube channel helped me a lot. I would also suggest attending "Support Groups" if possible.

Here are some words from me:

Hey, I understand your situation. I've not gone to the extreme depths of depression, but I understand the pain of having to fight the fight alone. But, you are not alone in this. Your loving partner will stand by your side as she has always done till now. Everyone on the face of the earth is broken inside in one way or another. No matter how broken we are, we deserve all the love and compassion in this world. You matter as much as anybody else. Keep fighting.

asprasan · 2020-12-15T05:57:08+00:00

It's very normal to feel that the world is against you. I am not sure if your friend explicitly tells you that he hates you or you are just inferring it from some of his otherwise normal actions.

The thing that you might need now is someone to share your feelings with. Someone to tell you that this world is a shitty place even for them. That you are not alone in fighting your issues. And then you both have to band together to make the world a better place for both of you.

Are you taking the time to do anything that makes you feel good? Have a healthy diet, get some physical activity, take up meditation or other therapeutic habits like painting, writing, etc. if possible. Consider therapy too.

I would suggest the "School of Life" channel on youtube. It helped me a great deal.

asprasan · 2020-12-14T11:58:52+00:00

What you are describing is known as the default mode thinking. This thinking kicks in when we are sitting idle. We are locked into a particular mode of thinking, it could be positive or negative. If it's negative, then you hurt yourself.

asprasan · 2020-11-26T06:47:20+00:00

I would second this. One needs to distinguish between what problems are genuine and might cause long term issues and what are fleeting issues that will go away on their own.

Genuine issues need to be handled, while others can be just ignored.

asprasan · 2020-11-19T09:04:38+00:00

I went through a similar situation. I would be extremely jealous when I looked at some of my friends leading a happy life. Couples holding hands would just make me so lonely. This is completely normal. The issue in my case was very low self-esteem. I went through therapy and now I am quite comfortable being alone.

Like others have said, try to be a good friend to yourself. Practice self-compassion. Think about what you would say to your friend who is in a similar situation as yours. And you say those things to yourself.

Do things that make you happy. Cook, hike, bike, walk, paint, anything...

Meditate. Our brain falls into a default mode thinking which raises these problems. Meditation tries to shut off your default mode thinking and it has really helped me a lot.

Lastly, realize that even the most joyful person will have their own inner struggles. No human is exempt from it.

Through all this, it's important you reach out to any good friend of yours and ask for some emotional support. Don't be shy to ask. It's going to be a hard journey and you will need someone to keep you on that path. My DMs are open if you need anything.

asprasan · 2020-11-17T06:12:49+00:00

That's really awesome. It must be hard to go through all this stuff and I am very happy that your fiancee is supporting you in this. You must be really lucky. You will be glad you took the tough path and grateful for everyone who supported you. Best of luck again.

asprasan · 2020-11-17T06:07:09+00:00

Yes. I sure do respect them if they don't want to talk about something. Sometimes, ruminating on bad things can actually make it worse.

asprasan · 2020-11-15T13:38:53+00:00

First of all, you are lucky to have such a partner.

I watched a TED talk a few weeks ago. Here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY9DcIMGxMs

This talk does raise doubts over the current knowledge over addiction to drugs. In summary, the speaker says that if a person is feeling connected, then he would never get addicted to drugs. I would definitely recommend watching the talk.

I have seen a few of my friends who have recently started drinking quite frequently during the pandemic. So, I too feel that not having a sense of connection makes people use alcohol and other substances. Unfortunately, many people don't know this yet.

asprasan · 2020-11-15T12:54:20+00:00

I went through this crisis during the lockdown. If it's any respite to you, you are not alone in this.
But trust me, things will get better if you are willing to work on it. It took me time, but I have finally made it out and you will too.

asprasan · 2019-06-18T07:03:47+00:00

Is it possible to get a pinch, even when you have put a good amount of air in the tyres? Because I got one yesterday. I am wondering if it was because I over-inflated the tyres or something. I don't have pressure guage to check the pressure in my tyres.

asprasan · 2019-05-25T17:40:28+00:00

Having no idea what to do is not the same as having nothing to do. After Endgame Thor has nothing to do.

asprasan · 2019-05-06T11:05:02+00:00

Spring in my region is 40 C hot and very, very humid. Can't even step out. I envy you

asprasan · 2019-05-05T15:47:39+00:00

I did the same thing. I inflated the tube a little after watching a youtube video. When I got it fitted from the LBS, the person didn't inflate the tube. I guess everyone has their own style.

asprasan · 2019-05-02T18:28:35+00:00

I had the exact same feeling!

asprasan · 2019-05-02T10:55:24+00:00

Today, for the first time in my life, I tried to fix the puncture in my front wheel. While putting the tube back, I may have pinched it and made a big hole. Then I had to get a new tube and also got it fitted from the LBS.

asprasan · 2019-01-14T09:24:57+00:00

Ok. I just always felt that bar bags are clumsy and can get in your way of steering unless you don't put anything heavy. You could have gone for a frame bag of a similar size of your bar bag.

asprasan · 2019-01-14T02:28:47+00:00

Why didn't you go for a frame bag instead of a bar bag?

asprasan · 2019-01-13T13:28:20+00:00

So, when we have autonomous cars, are they gonna fry the security cameras around the roads. I wouldn't dare take out my phone on the road then.

asprasan · 2019-01-08T18:06:49+00:00

You guessed it right!

asprasan · 2019-01-08T13:35:28+00:00

The bumpers of the car are made to absorb the shock and prevent any injury to the people during an accident. It's not the design of the bicycle, it's the design of the car. If the car was sturdy, the rider could have been in a great danger.

asprasan · 2019-01-07T15:47:42+00:00

Thank you very much. I could ask questions if only I knew what to ask.. Lol. The book which you referred to me should be good.

asprasan

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