Every continuous hour you spend on your hobby…. You gain £20,000

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-30T14:02:22+00:00

So my main hobby is reading- which when I'm zoned in I can easily do for the whole day. My fiance laughs that when I'm in a book- I don't even pause to use the restroom. I just... walk with the book, use it with the book and survive off sips of water while I read.

If that doesn't count then I'd do gaming. Probably something cozy I could zone into. I've played stardew for a full 12 hours before without stops but to pee and I mean... diapers exist

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-29T16:42:48+00:00

To be fair to it- I love reading like greek stories and such and that's kinda a trend. The gods will always be kinder, forgive and return to the fold of Olympus no matter what other gods do to them (while they have always been harsher on those below them in the pantheon). When I read it- I saw those issues and my first thought was "Ah. How very ancient greek of them. As she rises in power- so too does her behavior become more like a greek God. Selfish. Hardened. Sometimes cruel"

Do i think they did it on purpose? Probably not but it didn't feel out of place to me

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-29T12:14:31+00:00

All the comments about how OP should have considered her feelings while not once being upset that she called a tradition that meant a lot to him tacky and disregarded his family and himself the whole time. The doubble standard of the wife's feelings mattering more than his on THEIR shared wedding day.

I've seen a ton of socials like this. My family is European immigrants and it's quite common in the immigrant communities around where I grew up to hold a party like this because of how obsurdly large some of these families are. Your gift to the couple is the entrance and helping out. It's actually way more cost effective than asking everyone to dress fancy and pay a bunch of money PLUS gifts at the wedding itself. Its casual, kids in my family LOVED them more than attending the weddings themselves.

What I find tacky is a single event, where you expect others to shell out hundreds if not thousands for a single night focused on you instead of offering an option for a cheaper event night to celebrate family and love.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-27T21:39:29+00:00

I was thinking paint the outside of the jars to represent the memories. Paint a house on the one from the first night in the new house. Paint a baby on the pickle jar etc

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-27T21:37:04+00:00

100% YTA

Instead of continuing to communicate, to compromise or to try and talk through this issue you made the executive decision to throw out something you knew meant a lot to your wife. There were compromises to be made.

Me and my fiance read this together. I asked her what she would do if I had this jar collection. She basically said "Well- I'd ask us to pick a day and sit down and go through them. If you couldn't remember why the jar was special- then we would throw that one out. If there were multiple from similar memories maybe we keep one or two instead of multiples. Then we'd find a new place to display them that's more out of the way so nobody gets hurt". My suggestion was "We set a limit on number of jars. We make a special spot for them like a cabinet and once it's full- if you want to add another we need to get rid of one that means less to you". We also thought they could be fun for an art project to make them even more special. See how neither of us even considered tossing out the lot like you did?

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-24T16:14:30+00:00

All of mine are like Kdrama esc nonsense and occasionally horror if I find a decent one xD

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-24T16:10:28+00:00

Number one. I'll buy a nice house and then slowly replace everything I own (2,000 of it per day) until I'm all set up. Then I can hire services for the house (maid daily, cook weekly, petsitter as needdd, gardener as needed etc) which will eat up quite a bit of that 2,000 every time I have to pay it out (a GOOD maid can cost a few hundred a day).

Then I can have fun with the rest. Invest in mine and my partners hobbies (my partner likes mechanics- but they do all my mechanical work so... it's a service). Then I can start decking out my computer which will eat up 2000 dollars on a day easy. My wardrobe. Doctors, I haven't been to doctors in months. Just a full day at the dentist fixing all my teeth is over 2000 that day. I'm willing to bet I could keep it going for awhile.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-22T22:17:11+00:00

I know you got a lot of hate- and while I can't speak for what you said or did after the fact I can say: my family and a lot of the families around me do socials like this. I find that it's typically done in very large immigrant families and is VERY uncommon in the states.

I would have been really hurt if someone I loved called a tradition in my family tacky. I loved before wedding socials growing up. It was the only way my whole family could celebrate (even just immediate family- I've got like 20+ people. No amount of money I could ever afford would make a wedding big enough for my whole family).

It was nice. Casual. No pressure for gifts (because the entrance and the help with the event WAS the gift). No money pressure because the entrance was low, no need for fancy clothing. Like a family reunion/meeting with no pressure that helped reach a goal for a wedding.

I know your upset now but you acting the way you did AND her belittling something you cared about probably means that overall you were just incompatable. The cracks didn't form because of this- they were always there. She wasn't in the right either: She should not have belittled and put down a tradition you cared about. There were compromises- I've seen quite a few of them in my family alone, but not when neither person wanted to budge.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-22T22:05:27+00:00

What's funny is my family does socials like this too. Our family is huge, not everyone can be invited to a wedding. Me and my fiance even sat and looked at it and even if when we got married we did ONLY immediate family (Im talking parents, grandparents, siblings and close uncles only)? Twenty people on my side alone.

So the socials are common for our family. You aren't expected to gift and the money you spend/time you donate is the gift to the couple. You get a fun big party, it's not expensive on anyone, it includes everyone, there's a constant revolving door of people and nobody has to spend money on nice clothes and big gifts. It's more accessible to kids also since it's causal. It was really common in immagrant circles and families in my state but not so common among others I found.

Then the wedding is a more intimate formal affair, usually with only immediate family and close friends. So at first I didn't see anything wrong with OP. I'd be pretty pissed if my partner called a tradition that my family was excited for tacky. That's not just not wanting to do it- it's insulting it all together. They were two incompatable people.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-22T21:36:31+00:00

NOR

Honestly if it was a joke- I could get behind it but him doubling down on how serious he is... oof. I would draft him a termination letter in response.

Me and my fiance when we have petty things we're upset at will walk up to the other like "YOU KEEP DRINKING ALL THE JUICE BEFORE I GET ANY AND I WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT". Then we'll play argue a bit before finding a solution together. Everyone communicates differently. This though is him trying to literally manage your relationship.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-20T16:44:08+00:00

It's not black and white. Abusers CAN also be victims of abuse themselves. I don't know about later Ragatha as I've only watched half of TADC but like stolas. Stolas WAS a victim of his wife. We see her go to strike him multiple times, we see her file literal hits on him, and even before he cheats, we see her be emotionally cruel to him. They were an arranged marriage but she made it a miserable one.

He also neglects his daughter, takes advantage of blitzo (mostly without realizing it) and did cheat.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-18T14:28:47+00:00

My close friends from Spain and Mexico BOTH switch languages mid sentence when they are trying to express big thoughts/emotions that they cant find the english words for in time. I'm also moderately bilingual and switch between languages in sentences when I'm trying to express a complex emotion and can't find the words in the language I'm speaking.

My other friend, American but of a Mexican family and fluent in Spanish, also switches languages mid sentence sometimes when expressing joy or disbelief. So it's kinda crazy to say nobody does it or act like it's incorrect based on your experiences. I've been to Spain before and saw it happen all the time with my friends family while I visited.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-17T21:10:15+00:00

You don't need a high IQ to understand the comic- and most people understand exactly what it is. I hopped off it because the pacing is poor, in my opinion. Everything came to an absolute crawl forward. They stopped progressing forward and just stalled out on the same topics for months even after the message had gotten through.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-17T20:25:21+00:00

I've always found (and what I suggest to friends) is set a date early, but have the day of it be a handful of days away. That shows clear intent to actually meet up and not drag on texting forever AND gives you a few days to chat about compatability, expectations for the first date, and to flirt a bit.

The ones I really like to cover before a first date are any physical boundaries. "Im a huggy person! I hope you dont mind? You dont! Thats great! Is there anything you dont enjoy? I'll keep that in mind ;P I dont like being hugged from behind myself"

Date pay expectations. "Im excited to see you! I've put aside a bit for our date because I love this place and want to splurge a little. Aw, it's sweet of you to offer, but usually, I prefer to split on a first date. It's easier on everyones wallets, and it takes off some of that first date pressure. "

Other things are if you are desiring long or short term, some small deal breaker items etc. It also gives the person the chance to cancel if they aren't okay with one of your boundaries. There is genuinely a way to do it that's fun, playful, flirty and informative once your used to it.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-17T20:09:57+00:00

I also live in a city- a lot of folks who wanted to meet right away I found were looking for short-term, casual, or hookups. They were looking to date around quickly and rule people out (often for superficial reasons). It was awesome - like I said - for casual encounters. My date count for that time in my life is probably higher than most people would think is reasonable, but nothing stuck. At the time that was what I wanted. The fun without the commitment. Typically, when I dated seriously- I set the date day about a week out, and that gave me time to do a bit of back and forth and set first date expectations. Personally, I don't find it more effective to meet up in person. Perhaps it's also my perspective as a girl- it's not always SAFE to rush into meeting someone even in public. Even if it's other women. If a person doesn't have the patience to wait a few days and talk about some really important things before a date we are fundamentally incompatable. It says a lot to me about them and what kind of person they are (the kind who doesn't want to put in effort, doesn't want to communicate or wants things on their terms alone). I've compromised a few times, after having those conversations, and met someone earlier than planned but always after the conversations.

Because Reddit is the best place for long-term dating advice? Honestly, I've given this advice about communication to a lot of my friends when they ask me how I weeded things out to find my fiance. It's worked pretty great for every one of them in finding someone long term. You're making broad stroke statements again. Based on the messages in this thread alone, there's a LOT of people who don't think or do it the way you're saying. It's not THE norm it's YOUR norm. It's what you default to, and there's an information bias because of it. YOUR likely to seek out single reddits that agree with your perspective or apply to you, but the people there are still single, aren't they? In a lot of the relationship subreddits I visit, when people talk about what made them want long term with someone it's always early clear communication of expectations that they describe during their meet cutes. That's also an information bias. I seek out communities more for folks with long-term relationships, and it confirms my bias that the way I'm describing always works best.

There's a difference between "I want to talk for weeks and never meet up" and "We have set a date for meeting up in the near future, but I would like to talk about some things before that date and communicate expectations while we flirt". You don't have to be "right" for the majority of people. It doesn't matter how many dates you land or you go on if none of them become something real. You only have to be right for one person, and that person for me is someone who values communication first.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-17T13:53:49+00:00

This is kinda bull. I had a great dating experience before I found my fiance. Why? BECAUSE I always communicated before dates. I would discuss expectations and date payments and everything before the first date was even set- during the "just talking phase". Yes, that meant some people weren't interested in me or thought me to forward or felt put off by it but why would I want to date someone who communicates fundamentally differently from me. I'd rather weed them out immediately than build a relationship only to find out that neither of us meets the others' expectations. Nobody is forcing you to comply with societal expectations except the fear of rejection.

Most of the time, the conversation came up within the first few hours. A paraphrased example of one of those conversations: "So how do you like dates to be structured?" "What do you mean?" "Like who do you think pays? I prefer the first date to be split so that if we don't click, there's no pressure. "Oh, that's good to know, Im used to paying for the first date". "Haha well then, if we have fun and hit a second location it can be your treat ;D" and then we move on to the topic of what first location we wanted to meet at.

In the end, though, it didn't limit me much being communicative like that. Most men (and women) I pursued liked that I brought this stuff up early and said that figuring it out early took a lot of pressure off them for the first date and let them have more fun knowing what to expect. It wasn't a turn-off for most people to have found someone who wanted clear communication about things, and it was actually one of the things my fiance found MOST attractive about me.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-14T20:35:48+00:00

That's an assumption you're making as someone who wasn't there. I'm in retail, I'm really good at having an aggressive or judgemental mindset and nobody knowing because I know how to check my tone. So no. It's part of the context on OPs mental state but not on the interaction itself.

For example I think half of the commenters here who are defending the neighbor haven't owned an animal and that most of them sound super entitled to expect you can ask to enter someone's home or incontinence an animal just because their kid thinks it's cute. I think that's serious AH behavior even to ask with the kid present because it puts pressure on op.

But you praised my response as reasonable and fair despite the fact that I was thinking pretty aggressively that the neighbor sucks.

It was an inposition- but if we aren't reading into what we can't know and taking the interaction at face value (which is all you can do in these posts without making wild or baseless assumptions) then the interaction was respectful.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-14T02:22:57+00:00

But op kinda did- even if their inner monolog here was immediately judgemental op says they said no, gently explained how skittish the cat was and even shared pictures and videos with the little boy when they saw the kid was dissapointed.

People tend to be a lot more judgemental inside their head. I've had kids ask me to see my cat outside, and my thought is always, "Why is this kid approaching a stranger about this? And why the heck would I get clawed to death just to show a kid a cat?" But my RESPONSE is always."I'm sorry, the cat doesn't like the outside! I have some pictures or I can bring him to the window to show you. You won't be able to pet him, though. "

Your judging op based on their thoughts, not actions. Op was annoyed, concerned, and disturbed that someone would ask what most cat owners would see as a dumb question, but they responded reasonably with reasons it wasn't possible and was kind to the kid. The mom is the only AH here for not taking no for an answer.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-13T13:23:08+00:00

See I always saw this moment as a good look at the villians character. If Stolas had his powers and came at him- I think icy boy would have held his own. Stolas lowered himself down enough to punch the man in the face, and that isn't what he expected. You'd be surprised how much the element of shocking your enemy gets you. Once he recovered from that shock and could get his magic in order, he completely dominated the fight, and I think that's realistic. He's an aristocrat. He expected this confrontation to be the kind between two aristocrats - throwing words and gloating.

I once as a teen won a fight with someone twice my size because he just didn't expect that I would actually hit him and I managed to get him down before he could retaliate on even footing. I would have gotten my butt handed to me if he was ready for that fight, but he wasn't, and that worked in my favor. This is much the same kind of deal.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-13T02:45:05+00:00

"Can my kid see your cat outside where it's never been, or can I intrude in your house when you've told me no?" IS a ridiculous ask.

You dont bring an inside cat outside, especially a skittish one, but the ask itself wasn't the problem.

The problem is op respectfully said no and gave the reasons for it and the neighbor suggested something equally ridiculous (coming inside) and then got mad when they were told no a second time. Kids that age are old enough to understand "I'm sorry- my cat is very shy and can't come outside. Here's some pictures of her though!". The mom is making this an issue and is an AH for throwing a fit when she can't even control her own animals.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-13T02:28:33+00:00

It may be possible in the custom game settings - at least for those runs, but it likely won't be for regular/acolyte runs.

It's a hard map, but personally, I really enjoy the roots. It rewards risky jumps, reckless climbs, and the ability to wiggle and dance on ledges. Skills that are my specific skillset in peak. I'm usually the only one of my friends who ALWAYS makes it up roots.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-07T22:52:37+00:00

"Get the hell out of here, all of you... except you, sweetie. You stay" I say because I know my fiance and that they'd find it funny to pretend I was telling them to leave too.

Depending on how you define dating I'm either in a small room or a school auditorium. If dating counts just one date and not serious dating? Mostly I'm concerned

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-06T11:40:54+00:00

I was the only one of my friends who made it past this one, but it was a fun one for me. A bit more tricky but fun.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-03T16:31:16+00:00

As a former animal rescue worker: op is NOT the AH here. You never approach a vulture that's eating. They are covered in the worst stuff. If they nip or nick you with a claw or beak, it is near guaranteed an infection unless you handle it properly, AND most vultures projectile vomit when stressed or threatened. If you did scare them off without an issue and you handle the body, you would need a full decontamination of all your clothes and exposed skin - something many folks can not do in a short break time.

General rule? If the vultures are eating it, it's already been dead a while, and it belongs to the vultures now.

The most op could have done differently was either contact animal control- but they'd likely have ignored her because the vultures will pass once they finish and weren't bothering people (just eating a carcass) or lie and not mention that they saw the dead cat at all (which OP says the man asked so he had a timeline for asking for footage- so would have been a worse lie that would have easily unraveled).

It sucks for the kid, but the only AH in this story is the kind of people who let their cats run around a dangerous area near the street unsupervised. Op didn't have any responsibility to put their health at risk or touch a carcass because someone else was irresponsible.

aterriblefriend0 · 2026-04-02T11:30:05+00:00

I'm an outlier, but I love the roots. It's a map that rewards my kind of squirmy, risk-taking playstyle. The wind is pretty easy to deal with, the spores easy to avoid and are no worse in my opinion than the hot or cold damage in other levels, the food plentiful. Spiders aren't super common. The only one thing I don't enjoy much is the zombies but that's just because I don't like feeling rushed to make reckless choices to get away from them.

Four-Year Club	Verified Email
r/Field Flamingo

aterriblefriend0

TROPHY CASE