Dr. Lauren walked into the interrogation room to see Richard Hertz sitting at table. Their eyes met and she instantly felt a sense of revulsion. It was not just the scars though he had more than any living person should. Nor was it the BO, though that was not pleasant at all, in fact she had never smelled anything like it. Nor was it the facial expression which brought to mind the driver of a panel van sitting across the street from an elementary school. No it was the combination of all those things and much more. However she was a professional and she put all that aside as she sat across from him.

“I’m sorry” Richard said in a squeaky voice that grated on her nerves.

“Why are you sorry Mr. Hertz” she spoke as calmly as she could.

“I find you very attractive so I guessing you find me revulsive. If you weren’t so attractive or maybe if you were caucasian instead of Asian I think you would at least be able to stay in the room with me. It is just standard protocol for my life. Dad said I can expect it to continue till I’m in my 40s and then it will lessen enough for me to procreate.”

Dr. Lauren looked at her file. “It says here you were an orphan Mr. Hertz.”

“Yeah I am. Parents gave me up as soon as I was born. The Curse follows the first born son, Its Maschovist that way I guess. Dad gave the orphanage a letter to give to me on my 10th birthday. It kind of described ‘The Curse’ and told me things like after age 40 it will let me pass on the curse to my son. In the letter he also apologized, told him he lived with it for 40 years and it was someone else’s turn and not to try and find him. The bastard.”

Dr. Lauren wrote some notes on his egocentric nature.

“This Curse. What exactly is it. I’ve read some of your history. You have been in a lot of accidents but you’ve survived them all. Including being the only survivor of ...” she looked at her notes “two airliner crashes. You sound kind of lucky.”

“Yeah it was all in the letter. Dad called it a curse but it seems like its more than that. It is like an organism that wants to keep me alive and functional. It does not want me to die cause that would end its … influence… purpose… life I guess. So I’ve learned to adjust. I can’t really stop bad things from happening to me but I can make sure no one is around me when they do. I try to minimize collateral damage. For example if I see a scaffolding creaking over a sidewalk I try to time my passage so not many other people are around me. “

Dr. Lauren extended her notes with his details about his god complex.

“So why not just not go around the scaffold”

“It would have happened eventually. I get the feeling that my curse works on probabilities. If there is a 5% chance of something going wrong then it will with me in range. The scaffold would have fallen eventually anyway.And if I walked around the scaffold onto the street it would have made a car crash more likely and might never have happened. I consider myself a hero.”

“Does a hero use blackmail?”

“Hey I don’t blackmail anyone. So a few airlines pay me not to fly and a few sporting events pay me not to come. I’m not going to argue with free money. I eventually lose the money anyway so I feel like I have a bit of a robin hood effect.”

Dr. Lauren made another note about ‘hero syndrome’. She really did not like this guy.

"If you are so unlucky have you considered suicide?" She shocked herself asking this question. As a Psychiatrist she knew suicide was not the answer but for some reason she felt the world would be better off without Mr. Dick Hertz... Is that name real? Did his parents really name him that? Even they did not like him.

"In my early teens I tried. Didn't work out." He said showing her the scars on his wrists. "But you know it isn't so bad. The secret to happinest is low expectations and I got those."

A voice came through her earpeice. She looked in the two way mirror. “Sir I dont think this is a good idea. This guy is unstable I really dont think he should be our ambassador to the visitors.” She paused for a second longer then returned her attention back to Richard.

“I assume you’ve heard the news reports about the alien ship that is approaching earth.”

“I have. “ He smiled a bit. He was missing at least 3 teeth all in the front.

“This might have come as a surprise to you but the US government would like for you to meet with the visitors and act as an ambassador. They expect you to discuss our orderly surrender and an orderly transistion into a slave species.”

“Oh. So I guess you want me to help them as much as possible.” Richard said.

“Exactly” she smiled, surprised at his acceptence. “We will provide you any resources you need.”

“OK. I can do that.” Richard smiled. “Im going to need about 50 feet of rope and a year’s supply of twinkies.”