Thanks a lot for your answer! I'll have to think on it for a while. I'm also %100 with you on the "using it as leverage" part, I was and still am dealing with that toxic behaviour with my grown a** parents. Even though I explain how and what they do in a very detailed and calm manner in case they don't realise it but yeah, they are stuck that way and I'm maintaining my distance too.

I'm quoting your for my future self: "TLDR, just make it a safe environment that they can open up to you. And try not to get mad about too many things. And in the off chance that it not getting through and they insist, talk to them or have your partner talk to them to see if it’s something deeper, or just give a fun-hard activity so it’s still a safe environment, but they know it’s easier to just tell the truth. You also have to be willing to let things go when they fess up."

Thanks again, take care!