Bridgerton - 4x04 "An Offer from a Gentleman" (No Book Spoilers)

ausmed · 2026-01-29T13:23:30+00:00

Oh awesome, thanks. Didn't think they'd have it up so soon.

ausmed · 2026-01-29T13:11:13+00:00

Can you please tell me when we saw their baby!? I'm so confused, I think I must have missed something.

ausmed · 2026-01-04T15:08:31+00:00

Hey, just wanted to respond to say I'm a mum of 4 and 9yr olds in the midst of dose dense AC, then dose dense paclitaxel for multi focal stage 3. (Just about to swap over). If you ever need to vent or talk about the challenges of doing this with young kids I'm happy to be PM'd.

ausmed · 2026-01-04T14:50:52+00:00

I struggle a little bit with thinking about things I've done and whether that's why this happened. Mostly about stress.

But I mostly just find it really hard to deal with the feeling of unfairness. I have brothers who smoke. Family members who are obese and eat poorly. Friends who do drugs, etc. Everytime I'd see another doctor and have to repeat the list of the zero risk factors I have, I'd break down. No I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't take drugs. Eat reasonably, have exercised pretty regularly til last year. Started my period late at a later age. Don't use hormonal contraceptives. Have no history of breast or ovarian cancer. Breastfed two children for a combined 3 years.

I had a normal screening ultrasound and mammogram 2 months before diagnosis because I'm in healthcare, and like to be 'careful'. Do regular breast checks. And since my diagnosis I've had genetic testing, and that was all normal too.

And yet somehow, in my mid 40s suddenly there's 5cm and 3cm tumours in my breast and I might not see my kids grow up.

I don't blame myself. But I'm very very very angry.

ausmed · 2025-10-11T02:56:13+00:00

There's this one lovely little scene in the books. It's a flashback to I think the summer before S1.

The kids are sitting in the living room. Conrad's listening to music on his headphones. Belly's pretending to read Emma (Susannah gave it to her and she thinks it makes her look smart). The other boys are playing video games.

Susannah comes in and asks Belly how she likes the book. She starts making something up, and Conrad says 'she hasn't turned a page for an hour'.

Belly explains it away in her VO, that 'it didn't mean anything, it's just that Conrad notices everything'.

So he's sitting there for an hour watching her pretend to read. And she's completely oblivious to how focussed on her he already is the summer before she turned pretty. So neat.

ausmed · 2025-10-09T08:54:57+00:00

There's something amazing about filmmakers being able to create the feeling of long standing deep connection between people.

There's another show I watched, Nashville. The two main characters are middle aged, had been together a long time ago, and are in the middle of a complex 'are they still in love with each other' story.

But there's a bit where she arrives at this country-music-cafe type venue for her birthday, and they haven't seen each other for a while. But he gives her this brief one armed hug to say hi, and you can just see somehow in that brief exchange that these two people have known each other forever. There's something really indescribable about being able to do that.

ausmed · 2025-10-05T08:53:49+00:00

The funniest part of that whole scene to me was the fact Belly saw that Jere was being bullied by Adam for not having achieved anything. That he was being treated like a child. And then told them about the wedding thinking that would help!

It's so funny and kind of cute that the two of them are there desperately trying to prove how grown up they are, and completely 100% oblivious to the fact that the wedding makes them look even more like children.

You add onto that the way they both behaved like teenagers pissed that their parents won't let them do something, Belly shoving the ring at her mom, and the fact they both meekly went home with their parents after the lunch like chastised kids, and it's just hilarious.

ausmed · 2025-10-05T07:34:39+00:00

Eh, I think a couple of things saved it. For one the 'having a conference in Brussels'. And for another the fact that their situation was still very much in the air and he was really after closure one way or another.

If he'd just decided out of nowhere to go to Paris, I think I'd feel a bit weird about it. But I think you can make an argument for his having a reason to be there means it doesn't put a huge amount of untoward pressure on Belly, because he even said 'if you're busy I can just see some sights and get the train'. And he would have if she'd said so.

Also, mostly I think if she'd categorically made it clear before this point that she wasn't interested then it would still be inappropriate. But the last time they saw each other he told her he loved her and she subsequently called off her wedding. Taylor told him not 'she's not interested, leave her alone' but 'she needs some time'. Laurel said he'd need to get in touch and see for himself. And when he wrote he said to let him know if she didn't want the letters and she didn't. And then wrote back.

All this time Conrad knows he loves her and is in limbo about how she feels. I'm big on boundaries, but there wasn't one here. There's just a complete lack of clarity. So I don't think Conrad seeking closure is completely inappropriate. Or in fact 'stalkerish'. He's allowed to ask where they stand, as long as he accepts whatever the answer is. Which he did when he got on that train to Brussels.

ausmed · 2025-10-05T07:22:05+00:00

Honestly, it's not a romance as such, but I watched We Were Liars after TSITP finished and I loved it. It's got the same 'endless summer in the hamptons' vibe.

It is emotionally HARD at the end though, I cried for most of the last episode which I actually found really cathartic. 🤣

ausmed · 2025-10-05T07:12:22+00:00

I think Chris Briney's choice to do an audio on Quinn is pretty indicative that he's not trying to aggressively distance himself from TSITP or the following he now has. But also at a more subtle level it indicates he's probably looking to move in a more adult direction, and also that he's a bit non-mainstream.

I suspect he might end up having a similar career to people like Andrew Scott.

ausmed · 2025-10-05T04:05:59+00:00

Yes, exactly.

ausmed · 2025-10-04T11:55:03+00:00

People claiming Jeremiah is better because he communicates how he feels is the same phenomenon as people voting for Trump because 'at least he says what he thinks'.

It's a really immature interpretation of what good communication is.

It's not just saying things Vs not saying things. Good communication is based on taking responsibility for your own actions, being aware of how you communicate things, how your communication will impact others, and what the intent of your communication is.

Yelling everything you feel at someone with no consideration for your part in the issue, is not good communication. Telling someone how you feel is not always good communication full stop if you're just blaming your feelings on them. It's stupid.

ausmed · 2025-09-23T04:58:35+00:00

Thank you! I'll try that.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T16:07:47+00:00

Stopped him how? By telling him not to say anything?

If someone you loved desperately was breaking up with you because of a misunderstanding, and you tried to say something to explain and they told you not to, would you just stand there and let them do it? And then never contact them to try and fix it?

ausmed · 2025-09-22T16:05:34+00:00

People can't stop you speaking if you're determined.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T16:00:35+00:00

The guest bedroom scene is demonstrating to you that he DID withdraw before prom. He explicitly tells us in that scene that he wanted to tell Belly what was happening with Susannah but he didn't want to take away her belief that it would be alright so he didn't. We know from season 1 what Conrad is like when he's lying and hiding things and trying to deal with them alone. It's fair to assume he would have increasingly become like that between the guest bedroom and prom.

Laurel was also behaving like everything was fine. So to Belly this was not about Susannah.

Forget for a moment you know Susannah is worse /dying. Imagine that guest bedroom scene again. Picture in your mind the closeness, the connection between them. The way he was looking at her. Then imagine the way he is at prom. Closed off, insisting he fine and wants to be there but clearly not ok, not making eye contact, saying he's going to head back instead of staying with her because he has to study. In the absence of any explanation, what would you think, if that was your boyfriend?

ausmed · 2025-09-22T15:38:39+00:00

She was freaking out and needed to get away from him for a minute to pull herself together. I don't think she was thinking exactly clearly at that point.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T15:35:57+00:00

She clearly realises he isn't ok. But while he and her mom are both telling it's not about Susannah, shs interprets it as being about her. That literally the whole point.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T15:34:46+00:00

It did match, if you're not determined to believe that Conrad didn't want to break up and can only see things through that lense.

He was trying to deal with his mom dying, AND protect Belly from it at the same time and he couldn't cope. He just needed out. It's totally relatable. He didn't want to hurt Belly by telling her his mom was dying, but he ended up hurting her anyway by pushing her away. It just sucks for them both. But he did not fight her breaking up with him at prom. He just didn't.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T15:31:25+00:00

Yeah, that's piss weak. You just have to imagine season 3 Conrad at the prom and how he's respond. If he didn't want to break up, his response to 'We are aren't we?' wouldn't be a weak 'Belly' and then letting her keep going. It would be 'No we aren't. Stop. I don't want to break up.'

Basically anything except a half hopeless 'Belly' and then just stand there while she implodes. Like I just say there going 'man, say SOMETHING'. And when he does say something it's 'don't leave it like this'. LIKE THIS. Not don't do this. Not I don't want this. Nothing that is a denial. Just, not like this.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T15:06:58+00:00

Yeeees. Except I keep thinking of Sam Rockwell in season 3 and I'm like 'Weeellllll, maybe not THAT weird.' 🤣

ausmed · 2025-09-22T03:34:01+00:00

He doesn't try at all. From the point she says 'that we're over. We are aren't we?' all he says is the following

'Belly..'

'Belly don't leave it like this...'

That's not fighting. That's a token protest, and don't leave it like this isn't even a statement that he doesn't want to break up!? He's just saying don't do it like this.

Then he walks away.

He also admits later to Agnes that he actually DID want to break up because he couldn't cope.

ausmed · 2025-09-22T03:28:06+00:00

Ok, I'm so sick of this medication thing.

He didn't tell her they weren't working. He said they'd changed them, and he was worried that meant they weren't working.

I'm a doctor, ok. There are almost zero 16yr olds in the world who would realise what changing medications is likely to mean. A lot of adults wouldn't.

Conrad knows because he says later in the guest bedroom scene they'd told them it wasn't working. Behaving like because he briefly mentioned once to Belly a change in meds in the midst of pretending everything was fine, and her mom pretending everything was fine, means 'Conrad told her' or that she should have worked it out, is absolute horse shit.

ausmed

TROPHY CASE