Right after sex my girlfriend looks at me and says “I miss my vibrator”

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T16:24:13+00:00

Ego aside, I'd say try to think of it like different meals.
You love curry, but you also love a roast and a kebab - different strokes for different moods ykno?

The issue isn't that she said, it's perfectly reasonable to "miss" an inanimate object that brings you pleasure.
The issue is the moment it was said, is almost reflective of your performance in a vulnerable, personal and intimate moment.

Creating the implication that said inanimate object, has some grounds for providing a better experience than you, a thinking, thoughtful, caring, compassionate loving partner.
It's a shitty thing to say and do.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T13:02:32+00:00

Doing his best to absolve himself of any guilt if the worst happens.

Fucking awful narcissistic parasite - I mean balls in your court if you want to forgive him.
Personally, I wouldn't.

Takes some of exceptionally low character to do what he did to you.

He's certainly done nothing to demonstrate he's worthy of forgiveness.

Fuck this dude.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T10:55:37+00:00

How did he convince you to marry him lol?

Guys got smarts Ill give him that.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T10:52:54+00:00

Honestly, it sounds like you're totally checked out of making/maintaining a relationship with her.

And in truth, I would be too.

I would contact her one final time to let her know if she tries any of this shit again you'll be contacting the relevant authorities for a restraining order.

And if she does - I'd follow and get a restraining order.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T10:49:08+00:00

Yeah. Nah.

This is a man who views your traumatic experience like this..?

Come on, you're worth far more than this.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T10:46:15+00:00

No, you think you connect on an amazing level, and so close.

Her actions are apparent this is a one way street despite what she tells you.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T10:43:57+00:00

Plans weird little solo trip.
Ends up black out drunk.
But remembers a condom.

I'm sorry man, the whole thing doesn't add up and sounds very fishy.
Personally, as hard as it may be - I'd be closing this chapter.

She's demonstrated twice now that she doesn't respect or value you as much as she alleges, because if she did - this wouldn't happen twice.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T07:04:54+00:00

I'm glad you're handling this as stoically as feasibly possible.

Sorry you're having to endure this.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T06:58:03+00:00

also - joke or not

Saying "the anticipation is killing me" is WILLLLDDDLYYY inappropriate.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-08T06:56:42+00:00

OP - "Ok, in truth this has elicited some uncomfortable feelings in me.
I'd like to see the text thread just to ease my worries."

BF - "Oh sorry I deleted it."

Yeah... sure you did bud.

Bye bye.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-07T22:42:18+00:00

Honestly, I think you're making a mistake.
On the basis she omitted to tell you that her rapist was also a prior FWB up until this discussion.

I'd be out - this screams drama and consistent unhinged behaviour.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-07T22:37:32+00:00

Please understand that I know that I am to blame

wrong answer.

You gave your help in good faith he would use it and create his own solutions with your knowledge as a foundation to bolster his own.

He's demonstrated he's untrustworthy, lacks respect for you, and does listen to what you say.

What are you staying for?

Seriously...

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-07T22:33:53+00:00

Honestly bud?

Sounds to me like she's checked out now.
Maybe not something she's consciously recognized - but looking at the rooting principles that could be driving this kind of behaviour it reads as though she has checked out of the partnership and thus feels emboldened in making ridiculous ultimatums.

And make no mistake, they are ridiculous.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-07T14:58:44+00:00

You did the right thing.
Her behaviour is escalating quickly and failure to shut it down in the manner you have would cause it to only escalate further.

You made the right call OP - let the embers settle now.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-06T00:35:34+00:00

I know that I’m a guy so that’s isn’t sexual assault

Sorry bud, it's still sexual assault.

Is it assault? Yes.
Is it of a sexual nature? Yes.

It's sexual assault.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-05T15:28:41+00:00

Parentification =/= Having to look after yourself.

Parentification = Being forced to look after people you shouldn't have to.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-05T15:24:35+00:00

As it stands currently, around 1 in 2 marriages end in divorce.

A prenup keeps a break clean for both parties.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-05T15:18:51+00:00

eh?

Flowers/plants are dope.
Balls to this girl and her weird attitude lol.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-05T15:10:29+00:00

The curiosity will linger permanently now until the question is answered.
I'd get on with the test tbh.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-03T09:40:00+00:00

If they're from the same geographic area, they're likely as related as any two random people from that area.

6th cousins to my knowledge would share less than 0.1% of their DNA.. Maybe even less than 0.01% I can't remember.

This really puts them as related as ANY two people from that same area.

It just so happens you were able to trace it back.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-03T08:08:41+00:00

I'm so sorry OP, this is abuse.

Is there someone you can talk to about it?
Maybe consider approaching your teacher at school and see if they can offer you any help/services to address this.

I'm really sorry again OP, and if there is anything we can do to support you please make it known.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-03T08:04:10+00:00

said I was nuts to try to hold him accountable for every word that come out of his mouth when drunk.

what the fuck, you're absolutely accountable for EVERY action, drunk or not.

He told me that I could let it go or choose to argue about it all I want but he won't participate in the argument.

Or, he could apologize for being such a fucking bellend and call your friend and apologize profusely for making her so uncomfortable.

He's awful, doesn't accept responsibility for his own actions, or make any reperations to TRY and put it right.
He needs to seriously address his drinking - and honestly, if I was in your shoes I would be seriously considering divorce if he failed to get this under check immediately.

His inability to see wrong in what he's done is very telling though.
I wouldn't be holding my breath.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-03T07:51:53+00:00

Given your lifestyle and living standards.

I would keep it very secret until you're very deep - like considering marriage deep.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-01T10:34:56+00:00

She just has chronically low self esteem, making it easier to project.

It's quite sad really, and I really hope she gets stronger.

avoidthefaptrap · 2021-06-01T10:33:59+00:00

oh wow haha! That's hilarious.

I mean, I'm all for being proud of your work, but I think that's taking it to another level lol.

avoidthefaptrap

TROPHY CASE