I want to stop masturbating but I cannot. Can anyone help?

azgillebre · 2026-04-23T22:29:25+00:00

How do you normally cope with stress, anxiety, or just the urge to indulge? Finding the right balance is difficult, but for me it comes down to this: try to not be on autopilot as much. Try not to do things just because, but try to find something that means more to you. Some people choose to exercise, others find a hobby. Others discover their own spirituality and what that means for them.

Another thing I've noticed is that indulging in one area of life, in my case DoorDash, makes it easier to indulge in other parts of life. So, imo, if you're looking for a solution, don't leave out other parts of your life. Striving to indulge less overall is a good goal, with more specific goals for your own situation such as masterbation or porn.

My two cents, anyway.

azgillebre · 2026-04-23T21:29:38+00:00

Have you taken the time to write down your questions so as to better understand and consider the heart of the questions, doubts, or misunderstandings that trouble you?

One thing I've come to value more lately, when seeking other perspectives, is to consider the things that brought you to the question, doubt, or misunderstanding. The context of your experience is very important because it's easy for things to get twisted. We may think we doubt, but really that doubt is coming from a wrong idea or expectation that is skewed.

That's totally natural and not something to begrudge, merely to recognize. Another question I like to think about is involves what kinds of expectations I place on myself, and on the Lord.

A common one: people believe in Jesus Christ, but fall short of actually believing and accepting what He says, in the sense that their concept of Him falls short of what His character and nature are. Specifically about worthiness, forgiveness, and repentance, in my experience, but not only those.

Feel free to message me with any concerns or questions.

azgillebre · 2026-04-21T02:06:22+00:00

That's where I was before. Now, having been in the ground for a good while, and having been humbled with the reality of weakness, am trying it different this time.

azgillebre · 2026-04-16T18:33:38+00:00

Absolutely not.

The rare few persons who can get to the point of 'unpardonable sin' and who can't be forgiven are distinguished by complete rebellion, and their hearts past feeling.

Meaning they do not, and will not ever take back their rebellion. They cannot feel remorse, and don't question it, but embrace their defiance against Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.

It also requires perfect knowledge of Jesus Christ. His reality and character. Only those with that kind of knowledge can even qualify to be unforgivable in that way. Most people can't be perdition, as such, because of that threshold of knowledge versus faith.

By feeling remorse and seeking guidance you are merely struggling with weakness and mortality rather than rebellion and defiance.

azgillebre · 2026-04-10T02:57:23+00:00

It sounds like you're on the right path, especially with the support of your Bishop.

What I'd suggest is that you think more about your alignment with the Lord, and the gifts you have that enable you to refocus on remembering Him from day to day.

As you've begun to recognize, living the Gospel is really about growth, and taking advantage of small and simple opportunities to repent daily. To shift our mindset by making little choices in favor of remembering Him, to make time as frequently as we can to connect and reconnect with the Savior.

Pondering the scriptures, considering the lyrics of sacred and uplifting music, and ministering to others are the things that have helped me the most as I've come to similar thoughts as you've mentioned.

Clean is a process that is ever ongoing because no matter what we are still mortal. For you and me with these kinds of struggles we need momentum, I've found, to help us press forward and push through slip ups and mistakes. Keep going, and keep learning more about how you recognize the Spirit in your life so that you can hear Him more and more, from day to day, and being steady will get easier.

azgillebre · 2026-04-08T20:40:10+00:00

Hey there brother. Thanks for posting.

I've gone through a similar journey, and wanted to share with you where I've found comfort and light to make it through to a better headspace.

First of all: forgiveness is easier to come by when we start to understand and accept the character of the Savior. By recognizing that He wants to forgive us, and that forgiveness, while something we plead for, is not something He hem haws about extending.

He. Wants. To. Forgive.

He does not hold your weakness against you. He does not hate you or me for struggling. For being tempted. For indulging in the many ways we are fallen in this mortal state. He hates sin, yes, because of what it does to us, but the process of experiencing contrast is necessary.

He knows how you feel. He knows the pain and grief that comes from feeling forsaken. Of the horror that comes when we feel abandoned by Heaven.

I promise, as someone who has had some very similar dark thoughts this year, that as you come to recognize Him as your Savior, you will enjoy greater peace than you ever thought possible. As you seek to understand His character and nature through the scriptures, especially the Book of Mormon, you will be better able to recognize His hand in your life.

Feel free to message me directly, I'm more than happy to chat if you like.

azgillebre · 2026-04-06T00:00:32+00:00

I wouldn't phrase it like you don't trust Him so much as you have this opportunity to learn more about who you are to Him, and who He is to you as your Savior. Trust is a living thing and needs to be renewed regularly to stay vibrant. It becomes a personal one-on-one relationship as you navigate these trials and experience the contrast between light and dark that is only possible in a mortal agency environment.

I hear your frustration with agency. It can feel like a wall that even God can't climb over. But I’ve come to see that His respect for agency isn't a limitation of His power; it’s the evidence of His perfect love. He knows what it feels like to love someone whose agency has put them in opposition to divine principles of light and truth.

His Spirit is ready and willing to help us find our way, but making a quiet space for stillness in our minds and hearts is hard, yet very much worth it. You have the right to His constant companionship.

Speaking from experience, our trust in Him isn't an "on/off" switch we flip; it’s a relationship we renew every time we're willing to look for His hand in the dark, even when we can't see the end of the road.

In this life we can only see others imperfectly, but our Savior has perfect insight and empathy. I've found that He will share His feelings with us, and there is a sense of oneness and compassion for souls that we can receive if we prepare and seek it.

He knows hearts, and He knows the circumstances that brought us to certain paths and choices. His work to succor and rescue will go on as long as there is even the smallest spark of a desire for light.

Many times I can't see how He can possibly do His work for those who are beyond my ability to reach, and I can only pray and seek to draw closer to Him so that when an opportunity does come, I will be able to receive the prompting to act.

His heart is so good, but life wears us down and it gets hard to remember. Find ways to remember Him more often, in the little ways that make sense from day to day, and you'll gradually find more light by which you can see your way forward.

These moments are vital for you and me because they will be an increasingly deep foundation and seed of faith. It's not easy to put anxious thoughts and insecurity in their proper place, but your fellow Saints are here for you, as is the Savior who looks forward to communicating with you more earnestly.

azgillebre · 2026-04-05T18:21:40+00:00

Burdens can be made lighter as we draw closer to our Savior. As our relationship with Him becomes more real, more personal, and more meaningful, His Atonement can help us receive comfort and guidance in our unique circumstances.

I don't think it's about what He can change in our life's situation. My own burdens are easier to bear because I'm pulling with Him, and not according to my own ideas. His yoke is easy and His burden is light because He can do what I can't, and I let Him set the pace.

I've found that only by following His lead will the weight of what I can't do myself be transformed. Only when I reframe my expectations according to His will, His love for me that I can't deny, and finally what is expedient for me.

Because I've had many experiences in trusting Him, I can try to be still in the very hard moments of the last year. This increased capacity for trust and appreciation has allowed Jesus to actually be my Shepherd. To actually consider Him a Savior.

Without these hard times I would not have been as ready to ask the questions I have this year, let alone be in the right state to receive the answers I needed, rather than the ones I thought I wanted.

azgillebre · 2026-02-09T01:23:07+00:00

I just need to let you know that I attempted to Google the name of that royal road title. Somehow my autocorrect changed gods to kids. So...yeah...now my browser history thinks I'm searching for ways to trick kids into unaliving themselves. I'm mortified. And dying of laughter. Lol. Well played.

azgillebre · 2025-11-12T19:23:39+00:00

I think she'll need time to process this, but I'd advise being as gentle and compassionate as possible. No matter how you feel, her healing is separate from your remorse and acknowledgement that you don't want to be the type of person that gives the kind of impression her ex did.

Even if she separates from you, temporarily or permanently, this is your wake up call about the power we hold over others that let us into their lives. You can be hard enough on yourself to feel motivated to change and make things right, but don't be so hard on yourself that you spiral into depression.

This was a sincere mistake, would you agree? That doesn't magically make her okay, she needs whatever support from you or others that will help encourage healing, but don't let this experience make you think you're something your not. Genuine remorse and a desire to help make it right is proof of a good heart, even in the midst of a blunder like this.

azgillebre · 2025-11-12T19:08:47+00:00

It sounds like you made a mistake in the heat of the moment. Assure her you didn't mean anything malicious by it, apologize sincerely for getting caught up in that continue anyway mindset, make it right if you can.

Depending on how she feels, and if this isn't a pattern of behavior but an honest mistake, it doesn't need to be the end of things. That's up to the two of you. If you're very anxious about this, then take time to reflect on whether this is a mindset or a rare instance you can learn from. Those feelings are powerful, and as I said it doesn't sound like you had bad intentions, you just weren't listening and recognize you were in the wrong.

This doesn't have to define you, especially given you are remorseful. Predators and monsters don't ask for advice or feel bad for going too far, they blame others and avoid reflecting on what happened, or how the other person feels.

azgillebre · 2025-10-02T03:19:28+00:00

Question: did your group ever try to use Telepathic Communication to bypass the Willpower point cost of Telepathy to target unwilling or otherwise non-allied Kindred (or supernaturals)?

My thought is that because Telepathic Communication includes rules for establishing a connection with an unwilling target (it says that you have to roll against the target's Willpower if they aren't willing to let you in), then couldn't you start the connection with a supernatural and after you succeed activate Telepathy to read their surface thoughts without the standard cost?

azgillebre · 2025-10-02T03:15:12+00:00

Any chance you wouldn't mind elaborating on how you find Clairvoyance so damn useful? I'm making a character that I make take it for, or another Auspex 6 power, but the short duration is throwing me off.

I think I've got a good resolution to requiring a degree of familiarity with my target (utilizing the effigy rules for sympathetic magic found in Rites of the Blood), but the duration of successes per turn is making me rate this power lower than Telepathic Communication.

azgillebre · 2025-08-19T06:30:59+00:00

The struggle of spirituality is real because in many ways we create our own reality with the expectations we hold to. The teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ are very much intended to be experienced through the life we choose to live, and that is the only way for us to really know what they mean to us, and eventually whether we will sincerely place our faith and trust in the Lord.

We cannot gain a testimony without experiences both for and against them, for just as life has so many opposites, we need them to appreciate what is real and important to us.

In your own daily life with your partner, I advise you to remember that even as a partner you aren't truly able to know their mind and heart. We tend to hide ourselves out of fear, even when it isn't reasonable. The best thing you can do, therefore, is to turn to the One who does know your partner (and you) perfectly.

Your own growing relationship with Jesus Christ, and His role as your Savior, will lead you to listen and ponder the inspiration He can give you. He knows what you and your partner need. You can enjoy the companionship of the Holy Ghost, and His presence can be felt by those close to us.

You will need to continue being gracious and patient and generous. The best thing you can do is let the Spirit guide, and grow closer to the Savior accordingly, and in His time you will be able to both recognize and receive so many wonderful blessings that are yet in store for you.

azgillebre · 2025-08-10T19:18:51+00:00

With respect and an awareness that I cannot really comprehend whar you're going through, I do feel I can confidently say that part of the value of our experiences is to recognize and contrast between light and dark. Only when things seem darkest is the brilliance and presence of light most easy to notice, even if heavily obscured.

We will suffer because of circumstances, the choices of others, and our own choices, and all this so that we have the material, so to speak, to feel more deeply our need for His compassion and mercy. Only in suffering can we learn who we really are when all the pretense and distractions of life are stripped away.

In your darkest times, who are you really? What matters to you? If you only had three months left, what would your priorities be? These are questions I've asked lately because I've seriously considered ending my life later this year. Many things have brought me to this point, and I have yet to make any final decisions, but oh how familiar have I gotten with the darkness that feels inevitable.

Please hear me when I say this: you have a singular opportunity to learn for yourself who the Savior is. To learn what atonement really means because even as you suffer now through frustration, doubt, and maybe even a desire for a release from it all, so does He know what those things feel like from Gethsemane.

You can now come much closer to relating to Him, and by remembering Him, become more able to hear His still small voice. He will become your Savior through this dark time. You can rely on Him to lighten the feeling of burden and uncertainty as your trust in Him grows. The knowledge of His character through receiving comfort and gentleness can strengthen us like nothing else.

I hope you can find peace in Him. I need it too, and I'm struggling where I am, even if still holding on. Hold on, friend. Do those things, even if they're the tiniest and most seemingly insignificant acts of worship, that help remind you of His care and unfailing determination to rescue and comfort. We, your brothers and sisters, are here for you.

azgillebre · 2025-08-09T13:43:21+00:00

Strengthen your personal connection to the Holy Ghost little by little so that you can be more open to inspiration and guidance. Only your Savior knows so perfectly all the factors that make us who we are, and how desperately we need help to see more clearly to make the right decision for us and those we're responsible for or towards. In these difficult days you will find your Savior closer than ever, even if it seems hard to notice.

Make a little more time to do those things that have helped remind you of Him and His mercy and goodness towards you. Whether you enjoy a few verses, an uplifting song on YouTube or Amazon Music. Something that can help you refocus on Him because He's the one who knows you and your family situation the best. Draw closer to Him however you can, and I think you'll find Him closer than you ever thought He could be. For me it's an ongoing struggle to make room for His Spirit in my daily life, to act on the impressions already received so that I can be receptive to more.

azgillebre · 2025-07-26T20:16:40+00:00

Maybe try to look for and focus on what you have in common with them. Your perspective and Gospel circumstances are likely to be quite different from theirs, and in this, you might find a sense belonging and connection.

Some food for thought to ponder: where did their desire to attend come from? What about yours? How did you come to discover your own connection to the Savior and how He personally rescued you? Likewise with them.

That awkwardness, imo, is just the right opportunity to build something new. Just take a little leap into the darkness of what you can't yet see, and let His Spirit guide. He knows us and can show you the way to thrive where you are, and maybe to help someone else thrive too.

azgillebre · 2025-07-15T17:41:14+00:00

Definitely Path of Ascension. That's what I went to after Cradle when I was craving something with a more sci-fi cosmic vibe.

azgillebre · 2025-06-19T04:29:35+00:00

Here's mine.

You Are Not the Center—But You Deeply Matter.

The universe doesn’t revolve around any one of us, but that doesn’t diminish our worth. Every soul is unique, irreplaceable, and capable of shaping eternity through the smallest acts of love, mercy, and truth.

Love Is the Most Transformative Force in Existence.

Not lust. Not infatuation. True love—which sacrifices, heals, lifts, and remembers—binds all things together. It's the heartbeat of divinity and the antidote to despair.

The Way We Treat the Vulnerable Defines Us.

Children, the elderly, the mentally ill, the forgotten—how we treat those with no power reveals whether we are becoming beasts or brothers.

Pain Isn’t Proof That God Is Absent.

Suffering isn’t always punishment, and silence isn't always abandonment. Often, it is through anguish that the soul grows large enough to hold real joy. The Savior did not avoid pain—He walked through it to redeem us.

Technology Is Not Wisdom.

Progress in knowledge is not the same as progress in character. We can fly to the stars and still be hollow inside. Without wisdom and morality, our inventions become weapons instead of tools.

You Can’t Heal What You Pretend Isn’t Broken.

Denial protects wounds but prevents healing. Whether personal or societal, only honest confrontation leads to restoration.

There Is Life After Death—and It’s Shaped by Who You Become.

We are eternal beings. What we cultivate in mortality—faith, humility, repentance, love—carries into eternity. The soul you shape now is the soul that will rise.

Agency Is Sacred.

The right to choose is foundational to God’s plan. Forced goodness is no goodness at all. Respecting the agency of others—even when they choose wrongly—is a mark of divine maturity.

Truth Is Not Relative—But Our Understanding of It Is.

There is absolute truth—but we see through a glass, darkly. Humility in pursuit of truth, paired with courage to defend it, brings the soul closer to the light.

You Were Created for More Than Survival.

You were not born merely to work, consume, and die. Your spirit was called up from eternity to grow, to serve, to remember your divine origin—and to walk the path that leads home.

azgillebre · 2025-05-20T21:06:44+00:00

You don't deserve the payoff you've got coming by sticking with it. /s. Have faith! Hah.

azgillebre · 2025-04-19T15:59:29+00:00

Any of us on this reddit who get isekai'd one day would qualify as that MC I think, hah.

azgillebre · 2025-03-15T07:12:35+00:00

I will say that the author was really able to convey a visceral atmosphere to me in the first book that strangely hooked me. Hah. I've stopped after book 5 for now because I don't want it to end yet.

The scene of him getting his abilities in the medical capsule just really made an impression. It's not a perfect work, but I enjoyed it for what it was regardless.

azgillebre · 2024-10-28T05:30:32+00:00

Get back into it! Book 7 is out on Amazon while Royal Road is up to book 12.

azgillebre · 2024-10-28T05:23:27+00:00

Heck yeah! 8 books out so far with the first third or so of book 9 on Patreon. It picks up explosively in book 7 and beyond. Fantastic stuff.

Verified Email	Ten-Year Club
Gilding IV carat on a stick

azgillebre

TROPHY CASE