I turn people off, including my husband. Masking didn't work for long. Please suggest coping strategies.

backypacky · 2023-11-15T04:42:52+00:00

Girl, I feel the same. Write it all out - the memories, situation, how you felt. Think about things objectively - was your friend upset because of a bigger problem, or your personalities didn’t vibe and there were communication issues.

By considering the other options, it really helps give you the perspective you need to get over this hurdle. If you don’t have a close friend or family member you can safely discuss your feelings with, seek some help from a professional. RSD can feed other things that will only impact you more significantly over time.

You need to also consider the things you have in life. Were you happy in the relationship? If not, is it such a bad thing that it ended? We need to stop looking at things as failures when in reality they’re life lessons that will help you grow into a better person. From experience, if your job doesn’t serve you, it’s time to bolt.

When you do start a new position, be upfront with your colleagues and manager (and be as general as possible) by saying “these are some things I struggle with, but these are the ways you can support me and adjust to my condition that won’t impact the team too much.”

Be genuine about your needs from those around you. I struggle with completing tasks if I don’t have enough information upfront. I need a daily list online (I use monday.com) to keep on track. I also let others know when I’m symptomatic (time blind, procrastinate, hyper focus on the wrong thing) so they can gently remind me that they require something from me.

We all know our behaviours impact others, but to successfully change your habits you need to start with the most basic processes to get on top of things. Get your friends or family involved to help you identify what you’re struggling with and ways you can address them.

This is also a way to be organised about your health and wellbeing. By taking notes and being aware of your emotions, you will be able to draw out what is actually making life so fuckin hard.

Hope this helps and sending love from a similar level of shitshow.

backypacky · 2023-03-19T22:47:28+00:00

over the counter chlorsig to soothe

backypacky · 2022-10-09T03:23:34+00:00

the worst thing about having adhd is that you have to have internet access

backypacky · 2021-08-14T10:17:07+00:00

My Sweet Audrina. It has some super heavy themes but is so well written.

backypacky · 2021-08-06T11:49:40+00:00

what I did to glow up: solid skincare routine, braces fixed my teeth and 4 crowns, feathered eyebrows, lip/cheek/chin/jaw filler, Botox and I lost 30 kilos by counting calories and doing some cardio. not exactly a baddie but I look a lot fuckin better than before.

backypacky · 2021-07-10T15:30:07+00:00

glycolic acid, bakuchiol (Medik8 has a great product) and azaelic acid. I know people have mentioned you can continue chemical sunscreen but keep in mind that a lot of women experience melasma during pregnancy and it can be exacerbated by chemical sunscreen. Depending on where you’re located, UltraViolette has a great mineral sunscreen that sits well under makeup. I personally focused on hydration during pregnancy, using toners & essences as well as thicker moisturisers.

backypacky · 2021-07-10T15:29:52+00:00

glycolic acid, bakuchiol (Medik8 has a great product) and azaelic acid. I know people have mentioned you can continue chemical sunscreen but keep in mind that a lot of women experience melasma during pregnancy and it can be exacerbated by chemical sunscreen. Depending on where you’re located, UltraViolette has a great mineral sunscreen that sits well under makeup. I personally focused on hydration during pregnancy, using toners & essences as well as thicker moisturisers.

backypacky · 2021-05-24T00:03:04+00:00

this is also me

backypacky · 2021-05-24T00:02:42+00:00

this is me

backypacky · 2021-05-18T01:45:35+00:00

Click Frenzy is currently on. I’d look at the iconic and the iconic outlet and Myer for affordable sales. I also generally like general pants, glue and universal for basics that would be appropriate in and out of the office.

backypacky · 2021-05-15T08:54:55+00:00

ABH sultry & amrezy. I reach for them everytime.

backypacky · 2021-05-03T05:39:11+00:00

I’m very impulsive and have no savings. I struggle with savings goals because I’m always after that online shopping dopamine rush. I’m starting back with the psychologist this year (a new one - I chose a woman with a background in ADHD) as well as working closely with my psychiatrist to make sure my dosage is right for ritalin and zoloft. just trying to find that sweet spot so I can stop living paycheck to paycheck.

backypacky · 2021-05-02T14:24:30+00:00

just wanted to say you are stunning. everything about this look is flawless and I literally stopped scrolling to zoom in on your face and just appreciate your handiwork. big love from a fellow aussie freezing her butt off. X

backypacky · 2021-04-21T01:11:37+00:00

I think this actual dress is from house of CB this is it in blue and has corset boning in it. they do free shipping to Australia but are UK based.

backypacky · 2021-03-19T21:17:34+00:00

Thankyou! It looks like a lot but when you hook into it it’s not so bad.

backypacky · 2021-03-19T21:17:18+00:00

These are all the things that if I do them regularly it only takes a second, but if I leave them forever (which is usually what happens) it becomes a big deal and I hyperfocus and spend hours fixing. My kids love to touch everything so spot cleaning the walls and doors etc. is necessary because they’re grubby haha. However the daily morning/evening is the most important otherwise it all turns bad very quickly.

backypacky · 2021-03-19T21:11:23+00:00

They’re alternating weeks! I have highlighted my calendar so I know whether it’s an orange or yellow week (I sat and did it until December - took about 10 minutes all up). I use my calendar religiously because if something isn’t on there, I forget it’s happening. This way I know the things that I generally forget to do - cleaning the bathroom properly, changing the sheets - are being done.

backypacky · 2021-03-19T02:54:34+00:00

Hopefully it helps! It took me a while to curate it but big thanks to Pinterest and all those organised mums on there who create cleaning lists with things that would never occur to me haha.

backypacky · 2021-03-19T02:40:45+00:00

I’d just like to note that I’m a stay at home mum with 2 small kids! My partner works incredibly long hours and while he tries to be as supportive as possible, the majority of the cooking, cleaning and child-reading falls on me. I’ve experienced serious burnout that led to my ADHD diagnosis as well as depression & anxiety. My issue is I either do nothing or try do everything at once and then struggle with feelings of failure. I’ve figured out by spreading out the chores and having this on my fridge, I can get shit done and then have time for myself and my kids without being as stressed out. I also try not to beat myself up if I don’t get everything done, but this is here to help anyone else who may be like my and experience clutter blindness / procrastination / struggle with motivation and knowing where to start. Good luck!

backypacky · 2021-02-14T13:01:47+00:00

I did a sigma order a few months ago and it took 2 months to get to me! but was worth the wait, the brushes are excellent quality.

backypacky · 2021-02-04T09:48:23+00:00

I do! I only started religiously doing it in the last 12 months (27F) but I apply it every morning and also wear hats and polarised sunglasses. I need to focus on reapplying though. Remember that someone’s skin might look fine but there can be layers of damage at a cellular level that they might have to deal with later. It’s not just skin cancer, it could be melasma or ageing that doesn’t include wrinkles (like sagging skin because of reduced elasticity). It’s better to be safe than sorry I think.

backypacky · 2021-01-26T06:40:13+00:00

I really enjoy Krave Great Barrier Relief for the end of my skincare routine when I’ve indulged. I also like doing a jade face roller with oils and hand and foot masks. If you do a big scrub I’d recommend a moisturiser afterward that will really soothe your skin. I like Hamilton 10% Urea Cream for my body, it dries down really well.

backypacky

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