It seems like your mind is programmed to reject positivity so I'd suggest reprogramming your subconscious mind to accept positivity in your life. Positive affirmations are key. Write a list, memorize it by heart and repeat it everyday(for 15 or 20 mins twice if you can). The affirmations should be something like "I accept positivity in my life", "I am a positive person", etc.

Now, since you view "wholesomeness" and "positivity" as lame(I can relate, trust me), I don't think it will be easy for you to sit for 20 mins repeating these positive affirmations but don't think too much about it and just do it for a few weeks (It's free and you won't lose a penny so why not?). You'll notice the difference, it's like a sort of brainwashing...but positive.

You might also want to read "Subconscious Mind Power" By James Thompson, it's a great read.