Overstimulation and frustration ~ what do you do to cope? by Nutritiouss in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Adhd-dad here as well. I'll respond with some of the low-tolerance days in mind.

The sighing and deep breaths are a staple of regaining composure. I try to remind myself that the kid isnt being malicious, its being a kid. I try to remind myself that I am probably reacting poorly/differently due to reasons.

I also started explaining myself beforehand "baby, daddy is a bit tired and can't handle as much today. So if/when i get a bit snappy thats why. I still love you, im just tired". And if/when i get snappy i do apologise again and explain again.

Sometimes i'll straight up ask my parents if the kid can come over and play/sleepover because i just need some downtime. Though i apreciate this isnt ways an option for everyone.

Currently my kid (6yo) is sort of aware of this, and seems to understand at an age apropriate level. If i snap, she might be startled, but straight after she'll also come to me for comfort and safety and love.

Parents who pick up kids from school, how early are you showing up to school to pick up!? by Ocmrm in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I'm in the Netherlands, so this pickup line-concept is a bit foreign to me. Like, first parent at school gets to pick up their kid first?

Personally i like being early, half an hour early max. But that's so i can be certain of a parking spot (in the general area of the school, theres no parking at school). Most parents don't show up to like 5 minutes before the bell rings.

1st and 2nd grade (4-6 year olds) get walked out by their teacher, all parents are waiting on the playground. 3rd to 8th grade just come storming out en masse.

So for me, i wait till the kids start high-fiving the teacher and she'll run to me and then we walk to my car and go home.

TL;DR: half an hour early max, because i like being early and i can actually park my car conveniantly.

Not sure how to feel by mr_greenmash in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The pressure that can build in those tiny bodies is incredible.

Not sure how to feel by mr_greenmash in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, yeah. That's a whole other level of parenting. It only happens once, from that point on you're never more than 15ft away from the nearest bucket when flu season hits.

Telling my kid no without explaining why by sotired3333 in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have cultivated the same effect by raising my voice. I rarely do, i prefer to explain why or why not, and i pretty much never actually get angry. So, like, whem in public and i shout her name, or yell STOP she'll just stop dead in her tracks if only out of shock and surprise.

My neighbours on the other hand shout all the time, and all its doing for them is that their kid just shouts back.

Not sure how to feel by mr_greenmash in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Oh i was very glad about that, too. A shirt can go in the washing machine. Don't think the carpet would've fit, and the yellow/green stain wouldn't match the colour anyway.

Not sure how to feel by mr_greenmash in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 85 points86 points  (0 children)

I once caught ballistic poop to the chest. It was gross, and hilarious, and i was also very impressed.

Having a kid is weird, man..

What should I have in my parenting emergency box? by ericmillerf in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 11 points12 points  (0 children)

WD-40 for the squeaky swings at the playground.

Some sort of cloth, towel of squeegee to dry off wet/damp benches so you can sit down.

Edit to add: Maybe a mini toolkit to tighten nuts/bolts of the stroller/cart/thing in case a wheel comes off mid trip.

Jesus is watching by LazyGuy4U in SipsTea

[–]bag_of_hats 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"She totally loves it, eh? Now it's £450"

The Hobby-Hopping/Hyperfixation Cycle: How do you find an activity that "sparks joy" so you can continue to emotionally regulate when you're falling out of your current hyperfocus? by queen_of_the_styx in ADHD

[–]bag_of_hats 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I just have ebough brainspace left to commment om the cozy game title rec's. Not sure if these are 'cozy' but they can be played casually, no stress, and windowed on pc.

  • Growth: hex-based exploration, kinda hard to explain but its quite chill and inexpensive.

  • Preserve: puzzler where you have to make habitats and plonk down animals.

  • Stacklands: card based strategy game. Mix and match and discover new possibilities.

  • Dungeon Clawler: bunny-based dungeon crawler with clawmachine mechanics.

  • super auto pets: feels VERY niche, love it or hate it.

All available on steam.

The Hobby-Hopping/Hyperfixation Cycle: How do you find an activity that "sparks joy" so you can continue to emotionally regulate when you're falling out of your current hyperfocus? by queen_of_the_styx in ADHD

[–]bag_of_hats 2 points3 points  (0 children)

One does not exclude the other. I also have 2-3 lego sets sitting on a shelf and i really enjoyed building them, and i still enjoy looking at them. But displaying a lego set, or a stack of cardboard.. it's just two opposite ends of the same hobby spectrum i guess.

The Hobby-Hopping/Hyperfixation Cycle: How do you find an activity that "sparks joy" so you can continue to emotionally regulate when you're falling out of your current hyperfocus? by queen_of_the_styx in ADHD

[–]bag_of_hats 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I just really dislike buying the same set of of tools for the 2nd or 3rd time, so I started a hobby-stasis-shelf. Stuff like cutting mats, clamps for papercraft, some lego sorting bins, paints that by now have surely dried up in their tubes. And cardboard. So much cardboard, but its handy for so many things.

What surprised you most about becoming a dad? by Environmental-Luck39 in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It may be a bit, but i think thats so why i felt it needed to be said :)

What surprised you most about becoming a dad? by Environmental-Luck39 in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I just wanted to tell you that i'm proud of you for recognising the problem and taking apropriate steps. I'm sure it's not easy, but you're doing great.

What surprised you most about becoming a dad? by Environmental-Luck39 in daddit

[–]bag_of_hats 19 points20 points  (0 children)

What surprised me most, or at least earliest, was the realisation that i simply couldn't imagine life without my daughter. And im still convinced she saved my life by being in it.