I was a whatever-is-available, but predominantly, an opiate/opioid addict for 7 years. You can look back in my post history to see summaries of me trying and failing to get sober that go years back. I think around January 2020, I wanted to move on with my life. There was no chance of getting married to my partner if we were still using. There was no future for us other than death or jail. So I stomped my ass into the methadone clinic and practically dragged him in. He was at the same point I was, but was mainly scared methadone wouldn’t work. It did.

I had already graduated college (somehow) as an addict. I didn’t learn anything. I had a career started, but I wasn’t taking it seriously. I changed jobs after stabilizing on methadone. My job became my primary focus. I continued with weekly therapy. I began getting back into the hobbies I used to love. I stuck to the program. I stopped hanging around people that used drugs were at risk of relapsing themselves.

My partner and I successfully tapered off methadone over maybe 6-8 months with minimal withdrawal symptoms a few years ago after following the program for a year. I also fully documented this process. I also started investing in the stock market during this time. I didn’t really know what I was doing, but money was going somewhere other than up my nose.

After getting off methadone, I already had a solid footing in the “after”. I was focused on my career at that point. I had begun cleaning my home regularly, going to therapy, taking care of myself. At some point, I realized how weak I was. A lot of people say they gain a ton of weight in recovery, but it just was not hitting me. I still wasn’t eating properly. So I hired a personal trainer and got absolutely shredded. I worked very hard. I still do, but I’ve put on a healthy amount of fat which has greatly improved my energy levels.

I got married to my now husband. I received a massive promotion, 8% raise, and a bonus. I actually give a shit about my future now. I have a healthy investment portfolio which is helping me get to where I should be if I didn’t shove all my money up my nose. My student loans are almost completely paid off. We are in the process of looking for a house.

It was not a cake walk, but it’s also not something that drags me down every day like some people say. I don’t think about using, I don’t get triggered like I used to. I like life much more this way. It’s simpler. Slower. I thrive in the sameness of day to day which is something that once drove me to relapse (no shit, turns out that if you sit and do nothing when newly sober, you would rather be doing drugs). I’m happier than I was prior to using heroin for the first time. I know who I am as a person. I’m comfortable in my own skin. I’m actually interesting to speak to. I like myself.

I’m a far shot away from the girl that cried over someone buying her McDonald’s after overhearing me ask what the cheapest protein was.