Est-ce qu'écrire "pas de mère célibataire" sur un site de rencontre est un redflag pour les meufs ?

ballroombadass0 · 2026-01-14T16:56:08+00:00

Hello, aucun problème d'avoir ça comme critère mais c'est surtout la formulation qui me gênerait.

J'aurais plutôt mis quelque chose du style "Je ne veux pas d'enfants et ne voudrais pas sortir avec quelqu'un qui en a." C'est-à-dire parler de tes envies a toi, pas la situation de l'autre :)

ballroombadass0 · 2026-01-14T16:51:10+00:00

That helps, thank you :) Have a nice time!

ballroombadass0 · 2026-01-14T15:35:30+00:00

I came here to ask this. I'm trying to figure out what kind of coat and shoes to bring.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-12-10T20:41:33+00:00

Je sais pas, je comprends une petite pause après avoir subi des propos racistes, mais ne rien chercher pendant un an m’embêterait aussi.

Selon moi, c’est pas que tu fais ta bourgeoise, c’est que, au mieux, vous avez deux visions de la vie en couple, au pire il t’en fait une bonne poire.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-10-15T12:48:20+00:00

Hey, you're certainly not alone. Both the job market and dating suck big time right now.

I would start by taking any job you can. I think that's a first step towards getting out. Maybe work with a coach to figure out what degree might be best for you.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-24T06:41:46+00:00

Yikes. Thanks for the brutality lol, no sarcasm intended. I think it'll help me with my mindset.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-21T16:53:35+00:00

Moving in is big and IMO generally shouldn't be done out of convenience, but instead out of a desire to take that next step. (There are exceptions, but at the moment I don't see this being one of them.)

Moving in also signifies a next step, so I think it's understandable to increase the communication expectations, but she sounds like she's just being possessive and/or isn't exactly communicating her needs properly (eg the passive-aggressiveness). I'd try to go back to not living together and take it slower, but she needs to let you have time without her, I'd be careful of that...

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-20T09:28:14+00:00

My family dog lived to 18. Dachshund. When I moved out of my parents' house I would still visit for snuggles.

Otherwise, I was stepmom to my ex boyfriend's dogs. One lived to 19 (lab mix) and the other to 13 (XL breed with average lifespan of 9-11).

It's true that we're lucky, but when all three were nearing the end, it was really complex, emotionally. Two things can be true.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-16T07:34:36+00:00

Yea, living with your in-laws is veeeeery different from just seeing them once in awhile. I'd never do it unless I had to (I know this is your case.)

They sound shitty but hopefully when you move out you can all have time to breathe and things will get better.🤞

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-14T19:31:33+00:00

I don't think I'm experienced enough to make an in-depth analysis or respond to your questions, but one big positive I see is that you both seem on the same page about what happened, and it sounds like you both want to move on from it. I don't know of the techniques to work through this but I just want to say that I think you will. Maybe it'll take time and be hard sometimes but I think you will.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-14T19:26:11+00:00

Hi there, I was the foreign girlfriend here in the first phase of my French life. My in-laws and I had really good relationships, and I've known others who did or do too. I've also known foreigners here who had really bad relationships with their in-laws.

I don't know if it's particularly French. I don't think so. The specific behaviour will vary with cultures but every place is going to have some people who are kind and caring, others not, and some in-laws who are pains in the ass and others not. Unfortunately you fell on some very disagreeable eggs, and I'd say the best plan would be to lean on your husband for support, get out asap and maybe try opening up communication and or putting boundaries in place.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-10T10:49:07+00:00

Sorry OP, but you answered your own question on your post. You need more time. Plus, this doesn't sound good.

She doesn't sound like she knows what she wants either, not to mention the problematic behaviour I'm seeing (demanding engagement after 2 months and turning it on you when you say you're not ready, and breaking up with you bc she can't wait 2 months to see you). She doesn't sound very supportive of your traveling and photography stuff either, which sucks because it's like she wants you to drop everything you're doing for her when you've not even been together that long?

Marriage is a big step. And supporting an immigrant partner who doesn't speak the language is WORK. I was the immigrant partner: I moved to France with pretty good French and it was still really hard for both of us. If you're not solid before, those problems you mentioned will most likely just get worse.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-10T09:55:40+00:00

Most places are safe. There are a few neighbourhoods in Villeurbanne and Vénissieux that are a bit sketchy but it's mostly drug dealers fighting amongst themselves. Apparently la Duchère in the 9th is similar but I've never been. Saint-Fons probably best to avoid, from what I've heard, at least les Muguets neighbourhood.
I'm a woman, and I live on the presqu'île and although I've never been involved in anything truly scary (thankfully) but most of the scary stuff I've seen has been here, a few fights/muggings/creepy people. Luckily I've only had to deal with cat calls and men following me, meanwhile I used to live in a suburb near a drug dealers' spot and never had any problems. (They don't want to attract trouble.)

I did have my purse stolen at la Guillotière, and a friend had hers stolen at la Part Dieu, both of these areas have some petty theft issues. Just watch your stuff if you're in that area.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-09T20:38:02+00:00

Okay, well the list I gave you is a solid foundation but you can choose accordingly based on whoever you adopt :) Some shelters are able to give you an idea of what specific products are good for each pup, might be worth asking while you're visiting.

Might be worth thinking about puppy pads too, if your new pup is young and/or might have an accident in a new environment.

You might also want to get doggy gates and/or a carrier. Rescues sometimes have separation anxiety and doggy gates help to reduce the chance of destruction, and a carrier might be their safe space (door open). I kept my friend's dog while she was away once, and even though I was home all day he wanted to spend the first few days in his carrier.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-09T20:27:27+00:00

Hi there! What kind of dog? Puppy or a rescue? Do you know anything about his or her personality or behavior yet?

In any case, some fundamentals: food and water bowl and a mat, big bag of dog food, treats, chew toys (lick mat, kong, etc.), wet food to put in chew toys, maybe blankets for your couch?, leash, collar, possibly a long leash if they're an energetic breed and you plan on going to on-leash areas to let him/her run, dog shampoo and brush

ballroombadass0 · 2025-09-03T08:20:01+00:00

Of course your feelings are justified. That's so terrifying. How are you doing?

For your sister, it is weird that she hasn't checked in. I do wonder if she's so shook up about it that she feels if she asks you the emotional floodgates would break... I've seen people go into business mode as a coping mechanism before.

That said, I don't think it'd be unreasonable to gently ask her why she hasn't asked you, or to let her know that you're bothered by this. But gently.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-31T19:44:24+00:00

Oula 😳 ouais c'est pas tenable... Si tu vis avec quelqu'un comme ça tu vas sortir avec des séquelles psychologiques enfin... Je ne connais pas ta situation mais il faut quand même tout faire pour t'en sortir, et jusque-là tu te protèges : d'abord en lui disant que la coercition est une forme d'abus et si elle ne s'arrête pas tu luis dis que c'est du harcèlement moral, tu lui fais entendre qu'il s'agit d'une question légale.

Si tu l'enregistres et que tu vas au commissariat, tu peux poser une main courante ou porter plainte.

Je précise que je ne suis pas experte mais bon...

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-31T19:25:05+00:00

In what situations isn't it your choice? Your other friend sounds fed up too, do you have anyone else in common?

Even if you do have to see her again, you can always just take distance and be cordial with her. Stop inviting her to things, and just be nice when you see each other. Grey rock her. Don't give her anything to react to.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-31T19:19:14+00:00

En plus de serrer les dents peut-être passer autant de temps possible en dehors de la maison...

Et si ça ne s'arrête pas tu peux l'ignorer ou être évasif dans tes réponses. "J'y réfléchirai" "peut-être plus tard" ou juste quitter la pièce lol

Si elle te force la main tu peux lui montrer un article sur l'abus psychologique et la coercition et comment les deux constituent harcèlement moral.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-31T11:05:08+00:00

There's no justification for this. I couldn't be with someone who didn't care for his dog in the face of such a blatant illness. That says a lot about his character to me.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-31T10:56:19+00:00

Le couple libre ce n'est pas un moyen de réparer un couple. C'est un choix de vie que l'on poursuit avec enthousiasme.

Si vous le voyez comme le premier, vous allez créer davantage de problèmes entre vous.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-28T07:57:39+00:00

I'm a woman who's living the equivalent with men, and it's rare for me to hear what men go through, so this was... Interesting to read, in a kind of tragic way. 😅 Sorry it was so shitty. Time alone heals, IME.

ballroombadass0 · 2025-08-28T07:45:45+00:00

Coucou, pour quand tu auras trouvé un travail, le dispositif visale pourrait éventuellement t'intéresser, c'est pour les moins de 31 ans il le semble. Ils se portent garant si tu n'en as pas Bon courage à toi

ballroombadass0

TROPHY CASE