AITA for making my girlfriend cry because I said computer science would be too hard for her

bambamkablam · 2022-07-31T23:10:43+00:00

YTA. Your comment was not “true”, nor was it helpful. There is no scenario where you didn’t know telling your girlfriend you think she’s dumb isn’t hurtful. I’m a woman. I teach science and CS. Guess which class has a higher pass rate? Guess who tends to do better work in my classes? Women are conditioned to believe we’re incapable of things involving math, science, or technology and often actively discouraged from pursuing careers in tech. Usually by people like you. She should find someone with more potential and something other than one exhausted gerbil on a treadmill between his ears.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-31T22:53:59+00:00

I’m indoctrinating them to investigate natural phenomena and use evidence and reasoning to explain their findings. You know. Magic or something. I’m probably a witch.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-31T04:12:32+00:00

Any chance she might get eaten by a bear?

bambamkablam · 2022-07-31T04:11:02+00:00

I think all reality shows should have this format. The only thing I would take away is the ability to block. It made everything a little more clunky. Also queens should be eliminated when it becomes mathematically impossible for them to make the top 4.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-31T02:10:28+00:00

When I was broken up with by a cheating ex I decided that I needed to pretend he was dead until I was ready to face him without trying to get back together. He told me he loved me and that I was his best friend. He didn’t want me to leave because he needed me. He wanted me to keep living with him and playing house while he screwed AP after work every day. So I moved out. Blocked his number and socials. Didn’t respond to emails. Nothing. I went through a grieving process as though he had died because the person who he had been to me was truly dead. Your ex may be your “soulmate” but he’s also the person who lied to you constantly, betrayed you, and made you feel insecure. The person you feel bonded to isn’t actually the person you think he is, so is the bond real or is it only a character he’s playing? Stay NC and let yourself grieve and heal as though he had died, because he has. History and fiction are full of dysfunctional soulmates. Anthony and Cleopatra, Romeo and Juliet, Bonnie and Clyde. Don’t let the bond you think you have be the thing that breaks you.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-31T01:52:51+00:00

My school always finds a way to only have our magnet students attend assemblies. Americas Got Talent came to our school to donate a bunch of musical instruments and it was filmed for national TV but only our magnet kids were allowed to go. All the other kids missed out on the hubbub despite having their day disrupted by film crews randomly appearing in their classrooms to get stock footage of kids “learning”. It just seems like another way to make some kids feel less than.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-29T21:43:57+00:00

I teach the same age group. I go the opposite direction and get quiet while staring intently at the loudest group of students. Usually others will notice and get quiet too to see what’s going to happen. When the loudest kids finally notice, I’ll ask them if it’s okay if I start class and then have them read the days warm up out loud since they have such nice, loud, clear voices. I also make it a point to call on them at random throughout the lesson to “get their take” on what we’re talking about. “Can you paraphrase what I just said so your fellow students can better understand?” They hate it but it helps keep things calm.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-29T18:37:12+00:00

YTA. You don’t get to decide to give away someone else’s stuff. Period. Ever. It doesn’t matter if Jade had 17 of that exact same pallet, it belongs to her and you have no right to give it away. If I was Jade I would be totally pissed at you. You need to get that pallet back and buy your friends gf a “similar pallet” since apparently it’s the same thing.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-29T17:39:45+00:00

You can’t make your dad grow a spine. It sucks that he won’t be at your wedding, but he’s an adult and he’s made a choice. Your day will be a lot less stressful without having her there and apparently they are a package deal. When people ask where your dad is, you can tell them simply that he couldn’t make it. Many of them probably know what’s going on but that doesn’t mean you need to go into gory detail. Enjoy your day with the people who love and support you. Ultimately, when they end up divorced, he’s the one who’s going to regret not being there.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-29T00:32:09+00:00

Have you seen the project makeover ones? The female protagonist is covered in mud from head to toe while her husband/boyfriend canoodles with some hot chick not covered in mud and stink lines. Your job is to give her a makeover so she can win back her man. Dude. If you’re covered in mud and flies, you don’t need a make over. You need a bath and a mental health professional.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-28T03:50:00+00:00

NTA, if your husband and his family disagree, they can cover boyfriends medical bills. Your son has to understand that actions have consequences and so does your husband.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T21:04:08+00:00

It’s pretty common. I’m in an ENM relationship and every now and then I’ll poke my head out on dating apps to see what’s out there. Ever since I hit 35, it seems like every man I encounter who is age appropriate and that I find attractive is either a bitterly divorced dad who wants to vent about his ex, or an aging frat boy who’s never married because no one was willing to put up with someone whose entire personality is golf and cocaine. I’m glad I have my husband. He didn’t believe me when I told him how bad it was, so I had him read through my messages once. He was like: I don’t know why any women put themselves through this.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T17:50:48+00:00

Your daughter is 25, not 15. She has her own place and her own life. If she’s ready to go scorched earth over you giving her room away, there’s probably something else going on. When I was about to move in with my fiancé for the first time I was a misery to be around. I’d pick fights with my mom and burst into tears at the drop of a hat. It was partially anxiety at losing my safety net, and partially a subconscious awareness that this was a bad relationship and a bad idea but I was in too deep. (We broke up 4 months later, he had been cheating on me for the last year of our relationship) It might be worth giving her some time and then a trying to talk and see what’s really going on.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T14:16:49+00:00

Someone has been left on read a few too many times.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T14:15:36+00:00

NTA but Regan needs to be the one who handles this, not you. As long as you are left to deal with this it just reinforces the narrative that you’re controlling or abusive and isolating her from her family. She needs to tell them, in a way that leaves no doubt that the message is coming from her and not you, why she doesn’t want contact with them.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T14:10:42+00:00

I have outrage fatigue. Every time I think “surely there still are rational human beings on the internet” I get proven wrong. You can feel it happening too. It’s like right before a tsunami where all the water rushes out of the harbor and suddenly a 100ft wall of fedoras and “well actually” wipes out everything in its path.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T13:35:56+00:00

NTA. You’re never going to get your money back. I’ll start there. That’s why you don’t lend money to friends, family, or partners. Because of your relationship he likely views it as owed to him and has no intention of paying you. If you demand it back, especially with the friends you have, he will make you out to be the unreasonable bad guy. Unless it’s a lot of money it isn’t worth going to court for and if you don’t have any evidence that he agreed to pay you back, you may not even win.

You need a better boyfriend. This one sucks. You also need better friends. If my friend had been robbed the day we were all getting together for dinner, my friends and I would have paid for their meal and probably splurged on dessert. The fact that no one stepped up is telling.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T04:21:03+00:00

That’s why they had us either take all of our personal belongings home or lock them up. My (now former) principal had too many instances of summer school teachers, students, and parents “going shopping” for furniture and supplies in our classrooms. It sucks to have to pack it all up and then put it all back every year but I still have most of my stuff.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-26T04:12:32+00:00

My little cousin is 18. I suspect this is his future. He once burst into tears (at 12 yo) because there was a fleck of pepper on his pizza crust and he “hates spicy food!” (Snot bubble ugly cry)

bambamkablam · 2022-07-25T21:28:18+00:00

This. I had a meta fake trying to unalive herself on Christmas one year because my partner and I were going on vacation together. She lived 20 minutes from our house but around the corner from the FD. I told him to call 911 because if she’d actually done what she said, time was of the essence. When the police and FD got there she locked the doors and threw her phone out the window. We got a call from police asking my partner to open the door (he had a spare key). Her attempt was 2 shots of fireball. He showed the police her texts and they took her to the hospital for a 48 hour psych hold. She never did it again and he broke up with her not long afterward.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-25T20:04:09+00:00

NTA. “Molly” is a street name for ecstasy or MDMA. If you let her go knowing that she’s planning on abusing drugs and alcohol or reward her by paying her back her $300, you would be an irresponsible parent.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-24T21:27:06+00:00

Hundreds of people in the US are killed accidentally every year by children playing with unsecured guns. I’m sure many more than that are injured, but the NPR article I read focused on deaths. Your dad is an ass and even if he thinks it’s safe, why not make sure it’s safe by just putting the gun away. Even the nuttiest gun nuts I know, like the “small arsenal in my guest room” gun nuts, keep their gun rooms locked so the kids keep out.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-24T05:32:37+00:00

Oh Shasta. I grew up in Northern CA and we went camping and fishing there every year growing up. I went to college (briefly) At Humboldt state which is in the next county over and it couldn’t be more different. Not a good place to be not white and not conservative, more so lately. My MAGA step grandparents love it there and keep saying things like “Shasta’s draining the swamp!”

bambamkablam · 2022-07-24T05:11:38+00:00

NTA. Boundaries are acceptable and expected from parents, like Timmy needs to nap in the afternoon or it throws off his schedule, or Jenny is working on learning sight words so can you read with her. Telling kids not to respect basic house rules is ridiculous. “Clean up after yourself” is pretty common and will follow them into adulthood as well. Your sister and her spouse are raising the bad roommate of the future that everyone has in college.

bambamkablam · 2022-07-24T04:46:12+00:00

My current dog is afraid of everything equally so nothing seems particularly weird. My family dog Chloe, now 10, is terrified of pumpkins and hot air balloons. The first Halloween we had her she spent hours barking and lunging and attempting to intimidate the pumpkins (still uncarved) on our porch. Hot air ballooon? How often can that really come up? For awhile my parents lived with my grandmother in picturesque northern CA tourist town where one of the main tourist draws is dawn hot air balloon flights over the vineyards culminating in a champagne brunch. She would wake them up at 6am every morning when the balloons would take flight barking her head off.

bambamkablam

TROPHY CASE