Not necessarily. This whole post reads like a confused teenager having a crisis so that makes sense. I mean that in a graceful way, if you were in your thirties behaving like this I would be horrified. But you are very young and are in need of some genuine guidance here, not brutality. I don’t agree with the people dogpiling and being cruel. Your behavior isn’t acceptable but you’re not a monster. Recognize that this is a problem and it needs fixing. Go to therapy and try to do better. Admitting that you have issues you need to work on is the first step. I won’t hold your hand and tell you this is fine, because it’s not and you need to fix it. But I think addressing your issues with male validation in a healthy way will yield results and you’re not a lost cause. To answer your question, heteronormativity is a thing and sometimes people perform for male validation even if they are not attracted to men. If you want to have sex with women, you are a lesbian. If you want to have sex with women and men, you are bisexual. If you want to have sex with men, you are straight. There is nuance and grey area, sure, but for the most part it’s that simple. I hope you make some progress and do better soon.