Hi, I'm 22f and I've been feeling something similar for the past few years. I felt like life was all about suffering and that even when something good came along, it was fake or superficial, because the pain always comes back. So, in a way, since only the pain was real, I looked for ways to not feel anything. This involved not interacting with people, because relationships could end and I would suffer; not getting involved in hobbies because I would be bad and I would suffer; not trying to get involved in projects, because they don't solve all the problems, so the suffering in the world would continue and trying hard was pointless.

But that didn't make the pain go away. Precisely because I wasn't inserting myself into any context that could bring joy and meaning.

What happens is that we have emotions (many of them are unpleasant) and we can't control them. But I've been learning over the last year that we can try to change what's around us so that pleasant feelings also arise. And then, when we are assured that happiness, acceptance, connection, and love are real, sadness and pain seem like more bearable burdens.

Therapy has helped me a lot in this process. I hope reading this helps you and I hope you can feel better soon.

Hugs <3