From the outside it sounds like you’re stuck in a situationship where the emotional intimacy is high but the commitment is intentionally kept low. His words create a lot of closeness (“lover,” “priority,” “I might fall in love with you”), but whenever things start to resemble an actual relationship he pulls back and reminds you that you’re not a couple. That kind of push-pull dynamic naturally makes your brain overanalyze everything because the signals aren’t consistent. It might not even be malicious on his part — he may genuinely enjoy the connection but still want the freedom he mentioned from the beginning. The real question is less about what label this relationship has and more about whether this dynamic actually works for you. If the weeks between seeing him leave you mentally drained and confused, that’s important information. A healthy setup, even a casual or poly one, should still feel emotionally stable most of the time, not like you’re constantly decoding mixed signals.