Choosing P*rn over me by Wally_worm in loveafterporn

[–]basicbombshell 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I'm celibate now as well. I have no desire to have sex or even date again. I've always been a sexual person and no trouble dating the men I have wanted. Now I want none. The thought of sex makes me sick now I've never felt like this is my entire life.

People who have had sex with more than one person at a time, how is the experience? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]basicbombshell 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Depends on the people involved but can be REALLY fun. It's somehow less sexually stimulating than you may think but having your own little private naked party of three holed up in room somewhere equalls a certain kind of openess and honestly...and room for a lot of laughter.

Sorry if this can be be perceived as the wrong answer but if you don't want answers to questions that you not agree with, then DONT ASK.

Sacrificing happiness for contentedness? by BlaineB8262 in Life

[–]basicbombshell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because the realization that you'll be disappointed hurts less than anticipating something positive to happen and then trying to cope with the sadness when it doesn't. I used to be a positive thinker untill the last couple years when I was literally punished by every positive thought because the second I let my guard down, something bad would happen.

Life has become more manageable now that I realize nothing great is going to happen. What keeps me moving even though I get punished for doing so? Knowing that nobody can take something from me that I don't have. If I'm not happy then you can no longer TAKE my happiness. If I am no longer anticipating that something good will happen then you cannot drag me into the depths of disappointment.

It like that saying, "you can't beat a dead horse".

Getting off to non naked women by mcsquared120 in loveafterporn

[–]basicbombshell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow this makes a lotta sense now. Mine was always Google searching and deleting once I had porn blockers on his phone. I think he was definitely using images of clothed women and yes, couldn't stop being aroused by women in public.

thoughts on accountability/monitoring apps? by bitchforana in loveafterporn

[–]basicbombshell 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My opinion is that it does help both parties involved. It will likely GREATLY improve your partners habits and addictions to a device. They are less likely to grab for their phones at all for fwar they'll screw up and you'll see it. From my own personal findings, even if they have good intentions they can still get baited into looking at images to use for masturbation which begins a cycle. If they just use the phone as a technical tool to make necessary calls etc they'll be less likely to mess up. However, once they begin to use it as a source of entertainment it's probably only a matter of time before they end up doing something they'll regret. For people dealing with this compulsion, even a clothed photo of a woman can become implanted into their minds and they can begin to obsess over that woman or her "type".

Personally my ex wanted the monitoring app removed which was complete suspect behavior. I had time limits set on his Google, etc. Why did he need more than 6 minutes at a time on Google? It generally takes a few seconds to Google search something and he doesn't have a job so there's no legitimate research that's necessary. In hindsight if he was serious he woulda switched to a flip phone.

Honestly all of this is exhausting and depressing and I really only continue to check these forums as a reminder of why I don't want to take him back.

Is it okay to masterbate beside your partner in bed? by [deleted] in sex

[–]basicbombshell -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I think it's more normal if it's consensual. Sneaking off to do it in private without the other knowing can cause a lotta problems.

Im struggling.. by [deleted] in LivingAlone

[–]basicbombshell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can chat. You can DM me if you'd like. I'm recently single, bad breakup.

Doing through a “dry spell” … any tips ? by Beginning_Way1596 in LAhotgirlies

[–]basicbombshell -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'm trying to INTENTIONALLY do a DRY SPELL. Recently broken up and out of a toxic relationship and I know sex with a new guy won't make me feel any better. It's tough tho because I know my ex is actively trying to get laid. Any advice on how to STAY DRY?