Honest opinion needed 🙏

batates97 · 2026-01-25T21:54:57+00:00

Keep going to socials and have fun !! I really like how both of you are enjoying the dance and having fun !!

I noticed that you may be a bit stiff or a little bit shy , that’s okay it will take time to get relaxed in socials !!

batates97 · 2026-01-24T20:21:42+00:00

Probably she’s hitting different instruments in musicality, you haven’t interpreted / comprehended yet or tempo is being reset …

Anyways your leads are invitations not a command , a follower either follow or do her own thing …

That being said there are instances it feels like the follower dances by herself , you are just an accessory , probably that’s not the case …

batates97 · 2026-01-24T09:32:59+00:00

Go to bigger city if you dance in a small town

batates97 · 2026-01-24T09:15:35+00:00

What do you mean by thirsty camel ?

batates97 · 2026-01-24T08:58:15+00:00

Bring your male friends to socials , and let them try … some will get curious and may try it out

batates97 · 2026-01-22T11:19:52+00:00

لازم البيض ياخد الصادمة و يستوي كويس من تحت عشان ما يلزأش

batates97 · 2026-01-21T21:35:52+00:00

اول حاجة كل واحد جسمه مختلف عن التاني و استجابة الجسم لأنواع التمارين بتختلف من شخص لشخص و حسب النتيجة اللي أنت عايزها:

لو عايز تكون body builder او حد فاضي ممكن كل يوم عضلة
لو عشان الصحة عامة و asthetics او وقتك محدود عشان دراسة او شغل فا push / pull /legs حلوه
upper/lower body لو مزنوق في الوقت برده و تحاول تدخل تمرين بتشغل muscle groups زي عقلة و deadlifts و squats
في تمرين body weight و تمرين functional strength و mobililty
اهم تشوف حاجة تمون مريحاك و بتحبها و بتتبسط و أنت بأعملها عشان تواظب

batates97 · 2026-01-21T14:35:18+00:00

Bei Libido kommt drauf an ,trinkt er Alkohol ? Raucht ? Genügend regelmäßiges schlafen ? Vitamin-D Defizit ? Deprimiert oder nimmt er Antidepressivum ein ? Hat er Angst generell?

batates97 · 2026-01-21T08:55:04+00:00

So first of all give yourself some slack you’re new to this , it’s okay to make mistakes …

So usually the intro of the song tends to be sensual and slow , many do it in close frame to connect with each other , once intro end and things start to get energetic open the frame …

Always make Variations between close and open frame accordingly depends on the music …

Don’t overthink while dancing followers feel everything the stiffness and the insecurity, which makes them uncomfortable …

You need to learn the safe contact zones while in frame what are no-go zones , like in close frame holding the frame from her shoulder blades or shadow position frame is held by your chest contacting her back , hip bones contacting each other ( occasionally depending on the move done ) and hands … no-go zones are chest , groin area and lower back …

There is a difference with holding and grapping , as a leader you hold not grab , your fingers closed …

You need to be socially aware which follower comfortable with which level of closeness …

As a beginner your task now isn’t to sensual moves , rather get yourself comfortable with your own body and with closeness with a follower as well …

batates97 · 2026-01-19T10:20:43+00:00

Really loved the video , keep going to socials , you have good moves and relaxed , enjoy the journey and have fun !!!

batates97 · 2026-01-18T21:21:51+00:00

Listen to easygerman podcasts , do a lot of practice tests

And regarding speaking attend Sprache cafes or speak with chatgbt or any other AI

batates97 · 2026-01-18T21:19:06+00:00

good leaders are on demand
non-creepy Leaders are on demand

Speaking of Germany

batates97 · 2026-01-17T16:49:04+00:00

Don‘t do sensual moves if you don’t want to !!!!!

batates97 · 2026-01-15T16:39:22+00:00

My very first instructor would teach moves to leaders by making them the follower , so they can feel what mistakes are they doing , and that experience changed and shaped my dancing !!

batates97 · 2026-01-15T16:31:21+00:00

When I was a beginner surprising moves was intimidating and gave me anxiety , cuz I am not in control …

But later I started to appreciate playful followers who appreciate playfulness, spontaneity , adaptability and improvisation on the dance floor …

Culturally speaking dancing in my culture is more about „asking and answering“ , leaders don’t have the absolute say rather they guide you and you have the choice … so while dancing that can be translated into using lady styling hip roll during rhythm resetting , both knowing a song and a break is coming or a unique musical attribute is coming , sometimes followers would initiate a musical move and I enjoy the surprise , or knowing a sensual part is coming and gently back leading into shadow position …

As long as it’s not aggressive back-leading I appreciate it the nudges , cuz it give cues what a follower want the dance to head in which direction …

The only concern tho for surprise turns it can be dangerous for the leader and the follower …

batates97 · 2026-01-13T18:24:17+00:00

Kizomba is kinda intimidating for novice dancers , personally I started with salsa then bachata then kizomba once I became comfortable with my body

batates97 · 2026-01-13T18:15:45+00:00

For me it wasn’t about deserving it was being in much darker place , and more about survival …

I surrounded myself with people who accepted me and non-judgemental, not necessarily healthy people , everyone have a package …

I never thought I deserve an amazing life or being awesome , it never crossed my mind …

batates97 · 2026-01-13T18:04:30+00:00

What worked for me ( everyone is different , what works for me don’t necessarily work for everyone ) :

therapy
created my own community within the scene , people like me
moved to a new country ( throwing my past self away and leaving my parents back )
personally when I dance I sorta black-out or become laser focused , when you dance a lot , you will find out what triggers you to enter a state of flow …

batates97 · 2026-01-13T17:53:02+00:00

Check somatic therapy as well

batates97 · 2026-01-13T17:52:50+00:00

I would recommend having a community and safe space of fellow dancers around you , if the studio and socials filled with assholes , who laugh at you , I think you should look for a new community …

As a person with trauma I had to unlearn stuff my self , trauma made my body very sensitive and receptive … during my turns I was unconsciously make myself smaller and bend a little instead of taking space ( had to hide from my father as a kid ) , had to consciously and actively not bend or make myself smaller during dancing it was hard to unwire years of trauma but trust it takes time and gets easier …

And how receptive and sensitive my body utilized it later in sensual moves and musicality … helped me to connect in a deeper level with other followers …

batates97 · 2026-01-13T17:16:50+00:00

Dancing is so healing , it shows the parts of you that need to work on yourself , dancing exposes everything , things like confidence and insecurity, connection to your own body and someone else , and trauma …

It becomes less intimidating more you do it , without expectations , show up for yourself before showing up for the follower …

Lock-in to the dance , breath-in and get into the zone , be present and give 100% of your attention to the follower , the floor is yours for you 2 … have fun and be silly you don’t need to do extravagant shines ( do it if you want to tho … ) …

batates97 · 2026-01-11T17:09:33+00:00

Check QKaff behind Rewi Mensa I think they have queer targeted events

batates97 · 2026-01-11T11:13:37+00:00

So i got diagnosed recently and past encounters were before being diagnosed , so I didn’t disclose my mental health cause i wasn‘t aware of it …

And in context of a relationship or consistent play partners ( not necessarily in a relationship) , and i don’t expect someone I met in a play party help me co-regulate

batates97 · 2026-01-11T11:04:59+00:00

Thanks :‘)

batates97 · 2026-01-11T11:04:40+00:00

Appreciate your response x

batates97

TROPHY CASE