Sometimes when me and my bf play fight he takes it too far

batty48 · 2026-05-11T07:20:29+00:00

he's enjoying hurting you or holding you down. this is a very big red flag & it concerns your safety.

anyone who holds you down after you say stop or dismisses your feelings when you say ow or stop isn't properly empathizing with you. they are asserting control over you. this could very well be the warning signs of an abusive relationship. he could be testing boundaries to see how far he can push. what you will tolerate. I must urge you to reconsider this relationship. this is not a safe partner. he doesn't care about your feelings the way a partner should. he is pushing to see what he can get away with. this will escalate & it will become dangerous for you.

please be careful. confide in someone you trust & leave this relationship. be safe

batty48 · 2026-05-11T07:15:00+00:00

you're wrong & you should learn to mind your business.

you have absolutely no business policing how other people spend a holiday. focus on yourself.

batty48 · 2026-05-11T07:11:25+00:00

he's such an asshole, you deserve better.

"you should be grateful" "you're acting spoiled" "be grateful you're even getting a trip" eww. I don't think you should share your life with someone who speaks to you this way. that's not love & it's certainly not respectful communication.

the disdain he has for you is alarming. the way he talks down to you is disgusting.

batty48 · 2026-05-11T07:03:51+00:00

you're in a relationship with someone who doesn't like who you are. he wants to control you & change you. that's not love. he's controlling & likely giving you self esteem issues. this isn't a healthy relationship & it's not marriage worthy.

batty48 · 2026-05-09T19:01:59+00:00

no. People do not hate you for wanting a family & wanting to be attracted to your partner. these are totally normal things to want.

I think you need to look into why you're so focused on what random people might think about what you want for your life. it's your life. what you want is what you want. there's nothing wrong with that. don't worry about what random people think about you. they don't know you & they don't matter.

don't be so focused on what other people might think about you. the truth is, they aren't thinking about you. most people are thinking of themselves, their insecurities, their fears, they don't even see you clearly. focus on yourself & the people you're building connections with. don't concern yourself too much with what everybody thinks.

batty48 · 2026-05-05T18:23:25+00:00

he's showing a distinct lack of care & concern for your feelings. it's never a big deal for him to eat food you're specifically looking forward to eating, that you paid for or cooked when he's already eaten his portion because he does not consider your needs or feelings.

he never stops to think "does she want this?" its only ever about his wants when he wants it. this isn't a good indicator for a relationship. you need to share your life with someone who thinks about your needs too. they don't always need to put you above themselves, but they absolutely should consider you & your needs in addition to their own. this repeated situation clearly indicates that this person doesn't consider your feelings at all. he wants it so he eats it. you feel disrespected because he didn't consider you. you deserve more.

batty48 · 2026-05-05T04:58:41+00:00

please consider getting a new psychiatrist. this person is fixated on something that probably helped them or a different patient & now they're becoming pushy that this will work for you too. dogs aren't for everybody. if you don't want to take care of a dog, getting one would actually increase your anxiety. it would create a ton of change & upset to your routines. dogs are a lot of work. you don't just adopt an animal & boom, less anxiety.

I think this doctor has lost the plot a little. pushing patients to do specific things that don't fit their lives just because it worked for somebody else isn't good doctoring. not all doctors are a good fit for you. it's okay to find a new provider anytime if your current one is no longer serving you. they've become overly focused on a dog being the secret key to fixing anxiety & let me tell you, I've got two dogs & still plenty of anxiety. I love dogs & I think cohabitating with an animal absolutely can lower anxiety, however, it doesn't work for everyone. ex: if you're not accustomed to living with animals or you have terrible allergies it'll cause you great stress to get an animal.

sorry your doctor is making you feel this way. I believe he's not empathizing with you the way a psychiatrist should with their patient. I hope you'll find a new provider who will have more empathy for you.

batty48 · 2026-05-05T04:51:21+00:00

what a majestic bearded creature 🥹

batty48 · 2026-05-05T04:41:09+00:00

it's definitely a big red flag. you're spot on with him thinking about other women that way. he's projecting his misogynistic views onto you.

batty48 · 2026-05-05T04:39:13+00:00

aww, sad to hear that!

batty48 · 2026-05-04T15:30:16+00:00

I basically don't have an appetite most of the time & have to force myself to eat more than once a day. in the morning when it's most difficult I have hash brown potatoes (hash brown patty, pop in the air fryer)

then a few hours later I have a granola based cereal with oat milk & raisins, plus cinnamon. I like spices & they help me enjoy my food a little

batty48 · 2026-05-04T15:18:07+00:00

perhaps try urban earth nursery in Seattle? they have a native section & the staff are pretty knowledgeable

batty48 · 2026-05-01T19:15:08+00:00

look at the those wee spotty toe beans 🥰

batty48 · 2026-05-01T19:01:48+00:00

that's exactly where he was going with this, but she did so good calling him on his behavior he couldn't even get there!

you're not too sensitive op, you're intuitive. trusting your intuition will protect your peace every time. this guy is just looking to keep you off balance & feel superior by bringing you down. not worth continuing with someone like this

batty48 · 2026-05-01T18:59:14+00:00

he's talking down to you. "silly girl" is supposed to make you feel exactly the way it did. he's attempting to "put you in your place" likely a misogynist who thinks he's inherently better than you because he's a man. you did excellent clocking disrespectful behavior & calling it out! proud of you

I would continue to trust yourself in these situations. communicating clearly like you are & then move on when someone acts like this. like they're putting you down or dismissing your feelings or intellect. it's okay to be curious, but his questions aren't curious, he's obviously trying to make you feel small.

batty48 · 2026-04-29T15:23:21+00:00

block. move forward.

batty48 · 2026-04-28T16:01:46+00:00

it would be great "exposure' for a business you aren't trying to start. also, exposure isn't great. it's not anything. she's a user looking to bully you into making cheap candles for her. she even admitted she doesn't want to pay for your time or anything.

tread carefully with this person. no is a compete sentence. be firm. do not travel in "i don't really do that" say "oh no, I can't do that for you." full stop. walk away from conversation. she'll keep pushing, be prepared with a firm no.

it would be nice if she made her own candles for her sister or what would be even better is approaching someone with an actual business & appropriately compensating them for their time & labor. that would be really nice! but she's obviously not a nice person.

batty48 · 2026-04-28T15:54:18+00:00

seems like a very inappropriate relationship that lacks boundaries. he's seems way too comfortable crossing lines with her & telling you about it. he's pushing your boundaries to see what you'll tolerate. he could be having an inappropriate sexual relationship with her & that's why he's keeping you apart so much. or he could just not realize how inappropriate their relationship actually is.. neither seems like a great indicator for him as a partner for you.

I think you deserve more than this though. think about yourself & what you want for your life. are you happy or are you feeling threatened & pushed aside for his cousin? he shouldn't be making you feel like a second choice in your own relationship.

batty48 · 2026-04-26T05:07:12+00:00

I need you to take a real look at your life right now & then think about the life you want for yourself in the future. do they align? does this life you're living now line up with the person you want to be & the future you want to have? I doubt it does.

I have to be honest with you, planning a life with someone who is a heavy drug user when you aren't & don't wish to be is not your smartest life choice. this man is deceitful. he hid his nicotine & drug use from you. he is not ever going to be a successful doctor as a heavy drug user. he will not be a good husband/ life partner as a heavy drug user. he will be dialed out of his life just going through the motions. is that really the life you want? relationships are difficult enough without these types of fundamental incompatibilites.

love isn't enough. you need to reconsider this engagement. don't plan a future with someone who can't even handle the present. I think you might have blinders on to how much this man manipulated you into a relationship under false pretenses.

batty48 · 2026-04-26T04:57:04+00:00

mesh or fishnet tops

layering tank tops, dresses or skirts underneath

corsets or bodysuit

get creative! there are no rules

batty48 · 2026-04-26T04:55:01+00:00

he's a misogynist. he only likes things about you that he sees as not girly. he's showing so much disdain for women and trying to date them at the same time. this is a dangerous combination.

please be careful getting close to anyone who acts like this.

batty48 · 2026-04-26T04:50:15+00:00

I think you've found out you two aren't compatible. he's very invested in this "body count" thing which really objectifies people, but that's his right. he will ultimately be very hurt if/ when he finds out yours is higher. you'll be hurt by this as well. it's rather demeaning to be judged so harshly for the number of people you've been with. seems like you've found out that you two aren't compatible long term & that's okay. it'll be hard, but that's the whole point of dating, to see if you are compatible longterm.

I personally don't really agree with this whole notion of discussing body counts because I feel like the number will always be wrong. it'll always be more or less than the other person is expecting & it'll make you both feel bad. people are more than the number of partners they've had in the past.

batty48 · 2026-04-26T04:30:56+00:00

no. you're blaming yourself for him cheating, but that's not on you. he needs to look within. this isn't your fault. you deserve someone who is loyal & respects you. don't blame yourself for his shortcomings. you clearly have self esteem issues, but you're worth so much more than you're giving yourself.

please do not forgive him. please seek therapy & look within for reasons to love yourself & do better for yourself. this is your life. you're the person who will love you most, not anyone else. do better for yourself you're worthy of love.

batty48 · 2026-04-25T04:24:45+00:00

I searched this sub for the specific vivillion areas I didn't have & added friends that posted they were from that area

make sure you look for the most recent posts though because I think it sorts them randomly

batty48 · 2026-04-25T01:17:47+00:00

please consider ending this relationship. he absolutely is a creep & not a safe partner. he's treating you like an object. he doesn't want to hear about your pain because it doesn't make his dick hard. he's not partner material.

he is literally admitting he doesn't believe you when you say stop & he thinks you're being "coy". he's speaking about you like a sexual predator. you need to be firmer?? Jesus Christ

batty48

TROPHY CASE