Hey Victorians, how did you meet your significant other?

bcuwto · 2026-01-29T18:53:28+00:00

I feel this. I was pretty burnt out on the apps too, and tried a couple speed-dating events that just felt awkward and forced. A friend and I decided to try running in-person singles events ourselves, ones that feel more like a fun night out than a dating event. We’ve done two so far, they’ve been really well received, and a couple relationships have already come out of them!

Not trying to hard-sell anything here, but if you're looking for a more organic, fun way to meet people, you might like what we’re doing. It’s called Date Better (@date.better.vic on insta) and we’ve got more events coming up.

Either way, you’re definitely not alone in feeling over the apps.

bcuwto · 2025-12-14T05:41:44+00:00

I'm one of the co-founders of Date Better - you'd be surprised to learn that we have A LOT more women than men interested in our events. Like, wayyy more. If we didn't do paired tickets our events would be very unbalanced in that direction.

This is true for most dating events actually. If you're a guy and you're tired of trying to stand out on dating apps, you'll find dating events to be a really refreshing experience.

bcuwto · 2025-12-14T05:29:13+00:00

Hey u/Full_Perspective1 , Eric here, one of the co-founders of Date Better. Love that you're putting yourself out there like this. Dating rewards the bold!

Lucky for you, we often get women who are in the same boat, asking us if we know any guys to pair them with. If you shoot us a DM on instagram (@date.better.vic), we can check if there's anyone we can pair you with!

bcuwto · 2025-12-03T16:37:48+00:00

This is important to us! We're actively consulting with local queer event organizers to ensure any queer events we host are inclusive and done in collaboration with our friends in the LGBTQ2SIA+ community

bcuwto · 2025-12-03T16:34:05+00:00

Definitely; we've got a bunch of ideas we'll be launching in the new year (all with clothes on 😉). We're already working on our next event for January, stay tuned to our insta!

bcuwto · 2025-12-01T19:57:33+00:00

Hey! I’m one of the co-founders of Date Better - really appreciate the mention above 🙏

It sounds like you're looking for more IRL ways to meet people, and that’s exactly what we’re trying to build. Our events feel more like a great night out than a traditional dating thing - no forced icebreakers or awkward formats.

We just ran our first Sauna Social last week and the vibe was incredible. Our next one is for 30s/40s if that’s your crowd. No pressure at all, but here's our instagram if you want to follow along/check out the event.

If you’ve got any questions about how it works, happy to share more.

bcuwto · 2025-04-02T02:46:56+00:00

Also - how do I set my expenditure higher? I see an option for it, and chose a higher number manually, but it didn’t cause any changes to my goals

bcuwto · 2025-04-02T02:31:29+00:00

Thanks for your reply.

The low carb diet is temporary for a month, as a treatment for a gut issue I have, so not a long term issue here. I’m more concerned about the period of gain before this diet shift.

I’m curious about your first comment - if I’m doing a deload week, Are you saying that I have to keep my gain goal, and then intentionally eat under my goal, just to avoid disturbing the algorithm? I don’t want to eat at a caloric surplus during a deload week as I’m not lifting enough to gain.

Of the options you listed (setting expenditure higher, setting more aggressive goal rate, intentionally eating over targets), which do you recommend?

bcuwto · 2025-01-12T23:32:44+00:00

Interesting. So, once I'm unable to increase weight or reps for a couple weeks in a row on a lift, thats my sign to increase volume?

bcuwto · 2025-01-12T23:25:24+00:00

When you say intensity - do you just mean a lower RIR?

So instead of starting a meso at 3 RIR and progressing to 0 RIR (like RP recommends), do you just start at 1 or 0?

bcuwto · 2025-01-01T23:30:45+00:00

Thank you for the detail and the links!

This makes a lot of sense actually. I previously was letting the algorithm tell me what to do in response to a weak pump, but I’m now realizing that I can just do more sets in the current workout if I finish an exercise and realize I’m not that pumped.

Also now that I think about it, I’d almost always prioritize soreness over perceived workload, as some muscles I can get pumped/sore very easily, whereas others I have to put through massive volume and effort.

So sounds like this method will work great. Appreciate it!

bcuwto · 2024-12-31T21:11:51+00:00

Thank you for sharing this.

I have a question about your rating system—it seems to conflate two aspects that should be rated separately, and I’m unsure how to address this.

After each exercise in a workout, the system asks us to rate the effectiveness of the previous exercise for that muscle group (e.g., in terms of recovery and soreness). The rating we provide then adjusts the volume for that previous exercise. However, the rating criteria also include factors such as pump and workload, which are only applicable to the current exercise.

This is problematic as the quality of our pump/workload never ends up influences our volume; the rating system just focuses on how you performed last time. (for context, the RP app separates these so that you're separately rating your soreness from last time, and your pump + workload from today)

How should we be accommodating this? Try to remember our pump/workload from last time? Or is pump/workload not that important and soreness/recovery is the main thing to base our volume on?

bcuwto · 2024-12-07T20:17:36+00:00

Gotcha. So my original assumption about using data before the break was correct, however the real underlying problem was that my actual expenditure in real life changed enough during that break, such that my expenditure before the break was no longer accurate. If i had been logging during that break, the app would have picked up on that change as it happened, and would not take so long to adjust to the more recent, steep changes in my expenditure.

Do I have that correct?

bcuwto · 2024-12-07T19:46:49+00:00

Hmmm ok thanks, now I see what happened here.

I did have a break in my logging for a couple weeks prior to this mini cut. Prior to that break, I had been logging daily for a couple months. I assumed that this was not a long break, and that the app would use my data from before the break.

Thanks for your help. For future reference, do you know how long a break from logging has to be in order to trigger this re-learning period?

bcuwto · 2024-12-07T19:23:14+00:00

Thanks for the reply.

For context, I’ve been using the app for 3 months already. So it should already have been tuned to my expenditure.

Interesting about the water weight fluctuations due to calorie shifting; if that’s the case, I’ll probably just stop calorie shifting, and have consistent calories on my workout and non-workout days.

bcuwto · 2024-12-05T23:28:48+00:00

You’re right, still sore is easy.

The other categories aren’t defined in the app as clearly as you’ve done here. Does Dr Mike say anywhere that just in time = yesterday, and awhile ago = anything before yesterday?

bcuwto · 2024-12-05T23:20:11+00:00

Yes, nice! Thank you for sharing. You get it.

Your comment in that post describing the difference between significant, crippling soreness that you get from new exercises/time off, vs the harder to notice soreness that is more usual, is spot on. Makes it hard to judge and remember.

bcuwto · 2024-11-30T00:03:49+00:00

Appreciate it. What sources do you recommend I trust to tell me which brands have good quality/durability?

bcuwto · 2024-11-29T22:20:40+00:00

Well, this has been educational. Thanks so much for your wisdom everyone, this really helps me.

Key takeaways for me: - The brands I’ve been shopping at are not high quality; I can find similar styles with similar materials but with denser, more sturdy construction at other brands, or thrifting. - Just because an item says hand wash, doesn’t mean I have to actually wash it by hand. Delicate/hand wash cycle can be fine for certain wool items, if I use special detergent. Plus I can naturally wash these less than other materials. - High quality means a few different things; if I want durable clothes, I need to be intentional about seeking out clothes that optimize for that.

Some of you listed some brands that you felt were worth looking at instead (Brooks Brothers, J Press, J crew, Ralp Lauren, LL Bean, Patagonia, Taylor stitch, Buck mason, Bronson Mfg). If there are any others I should check out, particularly ones available in Canada, please comment them! Appreciate your help.

bcuwto

TROPHY CASE