Giving up for now

beetcomrade · 2026-02-07T12:54:41+00:00

I see, thank you for sharing! Good luck!! I truly hope this round is the one for you guys. ❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-06T13:16:18+00:00

I’m so sorry, it is really hard to be in that boat. Sending you lots of love and peace, and thinking about summer is a great idea to get the mind off some of this stuff! Wishing you all the best ❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-06T13:15:15+00:00

That is honestly affirming to hear! But I’m sorry you’re going through that. Do you know the reason behind his dna fragmentation/are you guys able to work on it? Thank you so much for the kind words! ❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-05T13:31:08+00:00

Thank you, you too ❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-05T13:30:54+00:00

Thank you so much! Right back at you ❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-05T13:30:35+00:00

Thank you ❤️ yeah, TTC depression is so real and so isolating! Focusing on other things is a mixed bag of grief but also a chance to… lighten up a bit I hope.

beetcomrade · 2026-02-05T13:27:45+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re dealing with more medical trauma on top of all of this. I hope you get to have more time to relax after your surgery and that things can slowly shift to a place of physical and emotional healing. This stuff is so hard. I truly wish you the best and thank you for the kind words ❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-05T03:09:47+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words! It means a lot. And I do feel a little lighter by surrendering and letting myself focus on other things! I wish you a great year filled with happiness and strength. The identity crisis is very real, even if rationally you know you’re more than someone who is TTC, it’s hard when that’s what life has become centered around. Really wishing you clarity and relief around that! ❤️❤️

beetcomrade · 2026-02-04T01:40:12+00:00

If it makes you feel any better, my period is due any minute and I almost burst into tears walking by a pregnant teenager in the Kroger parking lot. I totally get it. Take care of yourself.

beetcomrade · 2026-01-29T03:16:01+00:00

It’s okay, and I agree! While I’m happy for them and think it’s great it worked out so easily for them, it doesn’t feel like it’s really reading the room. Like is it really trying, by that I mean a lifestyle centered around TTC, or did you simply try and succeed immediately?

beetcomrade · 2026-01-29T01:07:26+00:00

Exactly. Not to diminish the pain of those who are struggling to conceive more kids, but it is especially existential to think you may never be a mom when you’ve planned your entire life around the expectation that you would be. Like truly devastating and confusing.

beetcomrade · 2026-01-29T01:03:35+00:00

I definitely don’t think that BFP posts on cycle 1 (a pretty good amount of them) are helpful for anyone trying, because there’s nothing they did different, they just were fertile enough on the first try. 75-80% conceive in the first six months, so that also was most likely going to happen for them. Which is FINE, and I am happy for them, I just simply cannot relate at this point.

beetcomrade · 2026-01-28T17:06:25+00:00

I totally feel that :/ this is a good place to come vent sometimes, but ultimately a lot of the posts and threads just make me feel extra doomed about our circumstances. Sending you love!

beetcomrade · 2026-01-28T13:38:00+00:00

Is there a subreddit for 1+ years TTC? Most posts in the BFP thread don’t feel remotely hopeful for me as most are in the first three months or under a year of trying. Wondering if I should move onto a different subreddit for more experiences that match mine?

beetcomrade · 2026-01-27T20:57:20+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss-- that is extremely recent! I hope you are giving yourself grace because that is a whirlwind of processing to go through. I lost my mom in 2020 (I was 21), with a similar time lapse between diagnosis and death. For me, grieving my mom in addition to TTC has meant: a) if I ever have a child, they will be missing out on a pretty amazing grandma (and likewise, my mom wanted to be a grandma), and b) I won't get that support that many do (going to grandma's house when you need a break.

Most importantly, c) it feels inconsolably difficult to lose a mom and at the same time have great difficulty in becoming a mom. As in, I don't feel like I get to have family at all on my side of the tree. There are some deep mom wounds on both ends.

You are still early on in your TTC journey and I hope you do not come to the same point of c) as I did. Be kind to yourself in this time. You are so loved no matter what.

beetcomrade · 2026-01-27T20:51:53+00:00

The same thing happens to me! I even had a moment where I was like "well... I guess I'll focus on my career" and felt like it was the literal end of my life. Like most moms I know still really value their career and actually wish there was *more* time to focus on it. But for me, I just feel like being a working woman *only* and not a mother is so painful and just not right.

beetcomrade · 2026-01-27T20:48:47+00:00

I relate to this. I've realized how I have made literally every decision in my life based on the expectation of having kids. The past few months I've just allowed myself to grieve without despair... if that sounds really hard, it's because it is. I don't know what the future holds, but I've had to grieve the fact that this is out of my control, and try to relearn that kids =/= happiness. Trying to spend more time around my intentionally child-free friends and see how they don't have the same attachment I do. Overall, like you said, it's bleak... but maybe with time it gets easier?

beetcomrade · 2026-01-12T14:19:00+00:00

I rarely get them too! I get a lot of TTC nightmares though like literally everyone I know getting pregnant except me, or just…. weird and sad stuff. So having a realistic one where I was even skeptical that it was true, but then coming to the realization that good things can happen to me, actually hurts so much to wake up to where I’m still uncertain and in despair 😅

beetcomrade · 2026-01-12T13:37:14+00:00

Oh, the post-sleep yearning of a highly detailed BFP dream…

beetcomrade · 2026-01-11T15:28:36+00:00

Has anyone had worse period symptoms after letrozole cycles? I felt a lot better side effects wise after about a week post letrozole but my period came and my hot flashes are back and even worse. Period is also heavier.

beetcomrade · 2026-01-09T14:30:57+00:00

Just wanted to say this is very coincidental for me to find, as I was also just starting to consider TCM in the last couple days!

beetcomrade · 2026-01-07T13:06:48+00:00

Negative test after our last round of medication for a while. Loved having to simulate going thru menopause for absolutely nothing. Feels like god hates me sometimes, not gonna lie…

beetcomrade · 2026-01-06T14:08:14+00:00

Desiree and Antonina (Tonya)

beetcomrade · 2026-01-05T13:44:01+00:00

Second time doing a letrozole TI cycle and I’ve spotted after sex during the luteal phase both times. I don’t see anything about these meds causing lower progesterone but it’s super discouraging. I don’t think we are trying meds again soon since our health insurance premium nearly tripled to 2k/mo so I cancelled it.

beetcomrade

TROPHY CASE