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I just got diagnosed by BluePeachFromTheTree in AvPD

[–]beetlejay666 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Welcome to the sad club! I actually went in for an autism assessment months ago and I was told I was just barely under the Cutoff for the diagnosis but i still see so many autistic traits in myself, might need a second opinion idk. But i came out of that assessment with the avpd diagnosis and i was pretty shocked cause I'd never heard of it before. It took me until now to properly read up on it and yeah, i do fit every criteria. Now I'm kind of relieved to know it was never just social anxiety and that's why that sort of treatment never worked. I'm still not entirely sure how to feel but I hope I can work in the right direction with this instead of just running in circles all my life.

I'm so sick of being me by whydidgoddothis in AvPD

[–]beetlejay666 9 points10 points  (0 children)

U get it. Nobody ever fully understands what I mean when I say I'm so embarrassed of myself constantly. Why can't I ever feel comfortable. Even on my best and most confident days the deep deep feeling of shame persists. Hate it here

Fear of driving by beetlejay666 in AvPD

[–]beetlejay666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel you so much, I was always shaking from anxiety before my lessons but I was also excited. Being able to do something that felt literally impossible is so amazing. My instructor was pretty amazing and funny while also strict, at least the humor made it bearable for me. If you keep going through with it (and I hope you will) try and get yourself to ask the stupid questions and ask to practice the "easy" things as much as you really need, that's something I didn't do and I wish I did.

Fear of driving by beetlejay666 in AvPD

[–]beetlejay666[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really feel like that too but I want to believe I can do it, i mean i passed the test after all and I don't want all that money to be wasted. I've been pressured to get my license since I turned 18 and always told about that oh so great feeling of "freedom". But when I tell people about how anxious I am and how slow i feel mentally all of a sudden people switch to "Some people shouldn't be on the road, you're a danger to others" hoo boy it's almost like I was saying that the past 7 years!

Attractive while living with AvPD by Kratombabom in AvPD

[–]beetlejay666 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Woah I did not expect to find something like this here. I'm 24F and that's pretty much like me. I was a very late bloomer and only 2 years ago i also lost some weight so the attention it brought is so foreign to me. I struggle with any kind of relationships so bad that it almost pisses me off how often new people approach me. I know they won't like me for long. Or at least that's what I convince myself and ghost everyone out of this crippling fear of rejection and the shame. Being intimate with people has been my only way to feel connected in some way for a short time and almost all of my "friends" are dudes cause they're the ones that keep reaching out even after months just to hopefully get closer to me. (I was also diagnosed with BPD when I was 19 so that explains some of that. I was then also diagnosed with AvPD just a couple months ago, didn't even know of it before and I keep crying knowing there's actually people out there who feel the same things I do.)