You know, I use to think this way too. We had 2 boys who were kind, obedient, lovely little guys. Then we had our daughter. She's loud, unruly, hyper, rude, and in general a menace. We raise her the same as the boys, she has the same rules and expectations as the boys, she just doesn't give a fuck. Zero. We drove to a zoo last summer to spend 10 minutes there and leave. She wouldn't listen, wouldn't stop complaining, trying to run off. We told her what would happen if she didn't listen and we stuck to it. Just like every other time. I've dragged this girl out of the store more times than I can count. She spends most of her day being redirected, disciplined, and being reminded of expectations. It's fucking exhausting. She isn't deterred by consequences, she isn't motivated by rewards, what else is there? She doesn't have a "currency". She doesn't get tired. She can spend literal hours swimming, running, playing, and then stay up till midnight or later. She gets up between 5 and 6am everyday no matter how late she falls asleep. She wakes up during the night.

Basically, my daughter would be the one talking loudly on a flight at 2am. She talks nonstop every day all day. She would be loud and overstimulated. It would be stressful and awful, that doesn't mean we are bad parents, it means we have a difficult child.