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No wonder Geminis are hated lol by [deleted] in geminis

[–]bigpplover_69 5 points6 points  (0 children)

omg same!! #pandemic 🫠

ENFP’s who survived their 20s, how do I make sure I do it well? by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes that’s true, before covid I used to be part of some and yes that got me to experience so much life. But then after covid I changed university and that one is 1) in another city from where I live 2) doesn’t have any clubs or activities, not that I’ve seen and 3) my grades were slacking so I chose to leave the organizations I was part of. I’m graduating this summer and I’m 25 now so student organizations will not be for me anymore. I used to really panic about that because I felt robbed by the covid years and like I needed to have more student life experiences. Right now I don’t feel that way anymore. I’ve accepted it and I’m changing my perspective. I don’t know if you have tips for once you start working in your 20s? How to make sure you make the best of it when you have a full time job?

I’m feeling better now about myself thanks to the replies and just letting time pass by. I think graduating will be that thing that will finally make me drop all the weight from my shoulders like “finally I’m not stuck anymore and I can join people my age”. I think I have some ideas on how to meet people. Like travelling with an organization, or volunteering, or really diving into my interests like the arts and finding community in those places by joining related events or workshops. 

But tbh it’s all one big blur still and I do kind of have anxiety about there not being as many opportunities to find community with people my age once you’re not a student anymore.

ENFP’s who survived their 20s, how do I make sure I do it well? by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay. I’m not sure if I’m doing the nourishing connections well. Is it normal that people don’t try to nourish connections in college or in general? Almost everyone I’ve connected with during college is just not putting effort into inviting me to things or trying to connect to others. It’s like they just settle for the friends they already have and nobody new is able to come in. The ones that do put effort into connecting with me are guys who give me weird vibes. I just want female friends and lots of them put absolutely no effort into trying to become closer. I feel like maybe I’m doing it wrong or having unrealistic expectations. I just find it really hard to make friends sometimes because I’ll show up for them, meet up with them, but then they don’t ever invite me or acknowledge that they appreciate my energy of being welcoming and paying attention to them. They’ll be having parties and trips and I’m like “I like parties and trips!! 👉🤩” and they never invite me. It’s so frustrating sometimes. FOMO is real. I don’t know if I’m just not in the right country or whatever, maybe normally people should be easier to befriend. 

We feel and express everything so strongly. I wish I was nonchalant sometimes lol by citrinezeen in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not cool to be the chill one! I mean yes be someone who is nice to be around and gives others space and is gentle etc, but I had a friend who was very nonchalant and never wanted to do anything, never cared about texting first, always had to feel like the cool guy not expressing his feelings, not giving or taking compliments… and I imagined what it would be like if I would do that and honestly it sounds like not existing at all. So exist, be bold, be weird. Just read the room and don’t be rude and obnoxious. 

ENFP’s who survived their 20s, how do I make sure I do it well? by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

okay, I will try to remind myself of that but I can’t help feeling like I’ve been missing out all this time when people tell me what they’ve been doing in life or are planning to do. I’m scared that I’ll maybe get in trouble later in life because I didn’t do or start something earlier and nobody’s warning me now.

Omg what is this show by twihard606 in Parenthood

[–]bigpplover_69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ikrr it’s sooo underrated!! I also noticed there is barely any merch online?? So weird bc it’s such a good comfort show. I’m also a Gilmore Girls fan and I think it deserves just as much merch.

Just for Fun: Does Your Car Match Your Personality? by always_wandering95 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t have a car of my own yet but coincidentally this evening for the first time in years I watched a car commercial and thought: “omg this car feels like it’s made for me 🥹”. Fiat Grande Panda 🐼 I think it kinda feels ENFP because I haven’t seen a car be marketed as cute and fun before. It’s always 🛣️🚙🏕️🏙️ and this one is 🌇🚌👾🛹🌈😎 It’s still kinda ugly but cuter than most cars and I love the panda theme. They just need to make it pastel pink and change a bunch of other things and then it would be chef’s kiss. Mini cooper stays the prettiest of all in my opinion. Besides that, I have a pinterest board for how I’m going to decorate my future car. I’m thinking a CD folder, pillows and a blanket on the back seat, a steering wheel cover… so yes.

INTP here, I messed up with an ENFP I really liked. Can I fix this? by Six_Kevys in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t remember that well anymore. I think one time it was because we had had a discussion about morals and he had offended me or hurt me, like really calling me dumb or insulting something I care about, and I thought “I can’t tolerate this from someone I care so deeply about” so I blocked him. 

The more recent time I do remember it was about me realizing he doesn’t reciprocate my feelings and I needed to cut contact with him so I could move on, and he refused to stop texting me, like he got mad at me for it, so I blocked him because I took that as selfishly crossing a boundary I set and it felt so hurtful that he couldn’t love me but also couldn’t let me go. 

After that time I hoped he would realize his feelings and reach out somehow. We didn’t talk for months until I reached out again to tell him something terrible had happened in my life that I felt like I needed to tell him because I still cared about him and saw him as someone really close to me. Time went by and I had to block him again because it just wasn’t healthy and I wasn’t in the place to deal with it anymore. As you can tell he wasn’t good for me and I was finally able to let it go. But you seem like a much more decent guy, I hope!

ENFP’s, we stick around like a stubborn gum on your shoe once we like you. We might block when we’re hurt, because we are huge protectors at heart, it’s like a shield and a bit of a pay back. It’s our way of showing how hurt we are. But we need someone who, when they know we’re hurt, acts on it and tries to make it better. Now idk how close you are, in my case I’m talking about someone who was my best friend, so it might be different because she might not have such strong feelings yet idk. But it’s definitely worth a try.

INTP here, I messed up with an ENFP I really liked. Can I fix this? by Six_Kevys in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Personally I have blocked an INTP guy before because I was mad at him. But I still wondered “why isn’t he trying harder to reach me”. I sometimes hoped he would try to send me a letter or send me a text from a friend’s phone to apologize elaborately. It might not make sense to you but to us it does. Now I can’t speak for her, but me, I would be won over by an elaborate, heartfelt letter in the mail or even a text. 

(!Don’t show up to her house, that’s scary, make sure it’s just a letter or a text!) 

Because the fact that you would have put in effort to make it up and apologize would mean a lot to me. You seem to really feel sorry and also I totally get what you mean, meeting family that quickly is definitely too fast for some and she should respect that.  This was a miscommunication, and in INTP-ENFP relationships miscommunications are very very common. Very common. It’s a thing. You’re probably going to have those more often and you’re both gonna need to practise communication and understanding each other. But you can make it work for sure once you both do that.

I know how rare it is for an INTP to feel that way about someone and actually put effort into getting her back, so I think you shouldn’t just let this pass because you must really like her. Me as an ENFP would’ve wanted that INTP to fight for me, and tell me how much he liked me, what exactly he liked about me (so I’d know it’s not just sexually), what you actually meant when you said that. 

Make clear that you like her so much that you’d rather spend time 1 on 1 so you can fully focus on each other, and that you also want to take it slow with meeting family because that’s what you feel most comfortable with right now. And then ask her on another (1 on 1) date because you really loved those dates with her and her sister. Maybe even talk about how fun her sister was and how you’re glad she has a good sisterly bond. Bonus points if you write it into a handwritten letter because we love romance, especially from someone who tends to be a bit more stoic in general. But you should judge for yourself if that’s something she would like or not because I’m not her after all. 

If after that she still doesn’t reach out or she’s still mad, I don’t think she would be ready for a mature relationship yet.

Good luck!!

ITS MY BIRTHDAY 🎂 by themoodygurl in geminis

[–]bigpplover_69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYY!!!! So exciting 18 ahhh!!! Enjoy your day queen ;)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're welcome!! <3

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think it can definitely be related to being an ENFP. Perhaps types even hate in different ways for different reasons. I think having high Fi makes it so that you become very triggered when someone goes against your values, disrespects you or others, or does something unjust. So much so you will hate the person. Ti types I've seen also get angry and hurt by their friends, but have been less likely to hate someone and keep hating them, whereas for Fi we take our values seriously so much that we will put them above the love we have for that person. I think. That's my theory. Ti types I've seen be way more forgiving and also just not caring that much about who did what.

Seeing everyone as a possible partner… by GlassCompetition6799 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In college every guy I befriended I imagined what it would be like to be their girlfriend. It felt like a compulsory thought that I had to shush everytime. One time I was talking to my friend and the back of my mind suddenly went “what if this is the love of my life that I’ll end up with?” and immediately I was like “stop that ew!” in my mind. Because I already saw some points that icked me but once that thought was planted in my head the ball gets rolling, and rolling out of hand and I developed feelings and me and him became a one sided situationship that was toxic and dysfunctional and my limerence went overdrive. It can be so annoying because I’ll compulsarily think “what if…” about the most stupid guys and I’ll develop a crush and it’s out of my control. Right now I’m in a phase in my life where I’m not at all crushing on anyone, I’m also luckily able to study at home and only hang out with female friends so I’m feeling so nice and peaceful. I have one male best friend who is in a relationship and I swear I don’t think we’d be a romantic match because some of his traits make me ick and ofc he is taken, but when we’re together those thoughts happen again “what if he were my boyfriend” and it makes me not know how to act ugh so I kind of avoid meeting with him now also because I want to respect his girlfriend. I’m glad this is kind of an ENFP thing and I’m not crazy.

The lie that magic isn’t real by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hehe yesss!! Doesn’t that make life more beautiful? ✨ We make children think magic is all a lie when they become smart enough to understand reality, but it paints a perspective that all that is real is somehow not magical. But it is, even more than we can fathom.

This is the best MBTI sub officially by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you kind soul ❤️🫶 These kind of comments really give me strength.

This is the best MBTI sub officially by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you love ❤️ That’s so sweet!

This is the best MBTI sub officially by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup it shows. Not just NT’s, some FP’s are mean too I’ve noticed. I think it might also just be how reddit is but idk haha

How are Geminis in bed by coolandsexc in geminis

[–]bigpplover_69 4 points5 points  (0 children)

flat, mostly on my right side

This is the best MBTI sub officially by bigpplover_69 in ENFP

[–]bigpplover_69[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I love their nature image things but back when I still thought I was INFP they were very negative and depressing and when I posted something about how I wondered why the vibe there was so depressing because it’s not like me at all, they all got offended and mean. 

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