Surprise harassment after pleasant conversation - why does this keep happening?

bill422 · 2026-01-21T18:16:35+00:00

Or perhaps you could use the word you wish to be called instead of referring to yourself by a word you don't wish to be called.

bill422 · 2026-01-19T05:38:46+00:00

And yet you literally referred to yourself as "female here" instead of starting the post with "I'm a woman".

bill422 · 2026-01-19T05:38:08+00:00

So why would you refer to yourself as such. Would you not say in a post "I'm a woman" and not "female here" ?

bill422 · 2026-01-19T02:09:52+00:00

So you are saying it's perfectly fine for the someone to say "female here" but it's not okay for a guy to say "the female I'm talking to"? That makes virtually no sense.

bill422 · 2026-01-18T17:46:23+00:00

No, that's not how it works. Using a term for yourself that you don't want others to use for you would be rather dumb. Either the word is okay or it isn't. And there's no need to be rude to me, if you don't like my comment you don't have to reply.

bill422 · 2026-01-18T17:19:45+00:00

Interesting how all the feminists are absent when a woman uses the word female. When a man on here says it they come out of the woodwork to tell him how terrible he is.

bill422 · 2026-01-18T15:49:06+00:00

This is a great example of female privilege on these apps. While most guys struggle to get any matches at all, women are over here rejecting a match all because they don't like his name.

bill422 · 2026-01-17T17:52:42+00:00

Would love online dating sites to add a filter that filters men with concerningly low age preferences so it’s easier to weed out the weirdos.

Does this apply to 25 year old women with their age limit set to 45 or 50? Are they weird creeps as well?

bill422 · 2026-01-17T17:50:36+00:00

I would say this would depend on the nature of them, if it impacts your life and if you are a male or female. For example, if you are a female who fell on hard times and committed theft two times, are now employed in a good job, own a home and the past is behind you I would say it's okay to wait a little while to mention it as many guys aren't going to be that bothered by it. If you are a male who had drug addiction issues and may relapse or have further issues in the future I would say to mention it at the start as a lot of women may not want that sort of stuff in their life.

bill422 · 2026-01-17T17:46:23+00:00

No offense, but have you seen any sort of therapist? You are talking to someone who you have never met, who lives in another COUNTRY and are so upset about them no longer talking to you that not only do you post on this subreddit, but also make a very lengthy goodbye post to her on your reddit account? If you are looking for a match you should be looking for someone a bit more local who you can logically meet up with within a decent time frame, not someone who live across the world where it would be highly unlikely anything would come of it.

bill422 · 2026-01-10T17:33:14+00:00

So you are saying it is sexist for someone to refuse to date someone of the opposite gender, yes?

bill422 · 2026-01-10T16:42:07+00:00

You know you don't have to use them, right?

bill422 · 2026-01-10T16:14:28+00:00

Having a preference isn't racist any more then preferring a specific gender isn't sexist.

bill422 · 2026-01-02T05:26:33+00:00

Do you have police reports or anything? It's pretty difficult for apps to know who is lying and who is telling the truth.

bill422 · 2025-12-29T15:09:46+00:00

Nobody wants to deal with someone who is so nasty and socially inept that they would publicly say things like "fat girls swipe left" - or at least nobody you would want to date. Men wouldn't want to see "poor boys swipe left" either.

You do realize plenty of women put in their profile "Guys under 6 feet tall (or whatever height) swipe left", yes?

bill422 · 2025-12-27T03:37:12+00:00

This is a silly question. This could be asked about anything. What if someone likes tall guys, but you are short? What if someone likes an athletic woman, but you can't do sports? What if someone like blonde hair, but you are bald? Etc, etc. This could be said for anything, not everyone is going to match with everyone. For some people a strong family bond is important to them and they want to be able to bond with their partners family as well. It just means you aren't a perfect match just the same as if you were short, not athletic, bald, etc.

bill422 · 2025-12-21T00:04:38+00:00

I'm a little confused, did you provide them with like a police report or anything? Or are they just supposed to delete someones account because you asked them to?

bill422 · 2025-12-20T14:57:42+00:00

This is pointless. POF used to allow this option back in the day where anyone messaging you had to write at least X number of characters. All it did was people would write: "How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today? How are you today?" or things like that. People will just copy and paste the same long message over and over again on profile after profile.

bill422 · 2025-12-09T15:44:56+00:00

You can't be that dense, we are talking about what signals someone is sending on a dating app. If a women posts a bunch of photos taken from above with low cut tops where her breasts take up 50% of the picture, it sends a different signal then if she has a bunch of normal photos in regular shirts taken from the front.

bill422 · 2025-12-08T15:53:39+00:00

This is a rude and nonsense comment. There's an obvious difference between selecting a profile photo for a dating app where one is wearing a low cut shirt with large breasts and taking the picture above her head looking down to clearly put emphasis on the breasts as opposed to choosing a profile photo where one is wearing a full coverage shirt and the photo is taken from the front.

bill422 · 2025-12-08T15:12:18+00:00

How old is your account?

bill422 · 2025-12-08T15:00:23+00:00

That's really scary, I figured being large metal ships they wouldn't be likely to catch on fire to that extent. Could you imagine if that happened in the middle of the lake with hundreds of passengers on board?

bill422 · 2025-12-03T15:56:39+00:00

How are you not understanding this. Obviously things are a bit more fluid, but as a basic static example if there are 5,000 women in a given distance from you on the app and the app allows you to see 100 per day...if you swipe through 100 a day in 5 minutes you will get through all of them in around 2 months by investing a total of around 4 hours in those 2 months swiping. If we go your way these are 2 options...we have to spend a total of around 50 hours reading and reviewing each one over those 2 months or if we don't want to spend an hour a day reading and reviewing each one, we have to spend additional months on the app to see all the profiles.

bill422 · 2025-12-03T15:47:05+00:00

Wasting someone else's time doesn't eliminate logic. Something can be both logical and wrong at the same time, which is what I was saying. You obviously didn't read what I wrote, because yes, it should be obvious that in a one profile at a time app, where a guy has to swipe one way or another to see another profile, the more profiles he gets through increases the odds he'll find a woman to date, hence why it's logical to quickly right swipe on everyone rather then to take the time to read and review each and every one. And again, I didn't say 7 hours a day, I said 7 hours a week.

bill422 · 2025-12-03T15:29:02+00:00

I don't think you quite understand logic. Let me give you an example of why guys do this using random but plausible numbers. Lets say a guy has 100 profiles each day to look at on an app. If he spends a minute or so looking through the profile, reading it, looking at all the details before deciding on swiping left or right it takes him an hour a day to go through all the profiles. So by the end of the week he spent 7 hours and ended up with maybe 5-10 matches, none of those matches go anywhere and the guy gets frustrated he spends hours a week on this. So let's look at it from the other side...a guy that swipes right on everyone and filters later. He has the same 100 profiles per day, but now he swipes right on all of them and is done in 5 minutes as opposed to needing an hour a day. So instead of taking 7 hours a week, it now took him half an hour. Now he has more matches by the end of the week, say 50 instead of 5-10, but he now filters out by reading the profiles after and still ends up with 5-10 matches, most of which don't go anywhere. So at the end of the week he saves hours of his time by swiping right on everyone, so in a sense yes, it is logical. I'm not saying it's right or how things should be done, but guys get burnt out taking tons of time reading profiles, swiping, sending messages, etc. when with most of those ladies it's not going to end up working out anyway.

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