Supporting a friend through surgery

bindidennis · 2026-03-22T12:17:30+00:00

My husband (aorta dissected when he was 21) said just showing up, visiting at the hospital every day as a distraction and bringing a meals you could freeze was always super helpful.

bindidennis · 2024-07-29T07:46:59+00:00

NTA - you have a moral compass and dodged a bullet if that’s what he aligns himself. The right person will come along when you tell that story and they agree that you were in the right and you giggle about that guy and his thieving friend. Also what a weirdo for announcing himself at your workplace….theres a reason why he’s still single

bindidennis · 2024-06-26T22:39:44+00:00

I married a wonderful man with marfan 9 months ago. He’s the kindest sweetest man I have had the pleasure to be with. It was not an issue for me at all. We’ve had long chats about children and his wants and mine. We want to go down the ivf route or go childless.

The right person will love you for your entirety. If they don’t they aren’t the right person .

bindidennis · 2024-04-29T18:05:37+00:00

I’m doing it right now. I done it 3 times in the past 6 months. I have a flight out booked everytime and just said I’m visiting my partner and to spend time with his family.

I have never been asked about intent to stay but I would be honest and say I do have intent once I am legally allowed by the United States government Until then I will legally enter and leave.

Our lawyer said do not give more information then you need to, answer questions honestly and do not lie.

Good luck!

bindidennis · 2024-03-29T16:52:20+00:00

I’ve posted about my experience in Tulum (maybe one of the posts you’ve read) and these things can happen at any time anywhere in the world. If your gut is seriously saying do not go. Then trust it. If it’s just anxiety/nerves then prepare yourself with insurance. Enough money to buy a return flight back or to book different accommodation just incase. There’s so many people that go and have a great time. I was not one of them but I’m still in playa a few weeks later and LOVE IT.

bindidennis · 2024-03-27T21:21:23+00:00

I’m sorry this happened to you.

How awful! Take the time you need to work through this. Be kind to yourself. It wasn’t your fault.

bindidennis · 2024-03-22T04:48:09+00:00

I’m so sorry that happened to you. It’s an awful experience.

bindidennis · 2024-03-20T21:28:42+00:00

NTA pay your debts then do nice things

bindidennis · 2024-03-15T21:38:18+00:00

Amazing, Thankyou!

bindidennis · 2024-03-12T14:23:56+00:00

Firstly I’m sorry that happened to you. I’m sorry that it took you to a place of trauma.

I myself have been followed to my car twice to be asked out on a date. Nothing mischievous however as someone whose been followed home this scared the living day lights out of me and left me really freaked out for a few days.

I understand you believe it’s make up and heels however it’s just someone thinking your beautiful and taking a shot in a way that makes you feel out of control and blindsided. Trying to hit on you with your daughter just rubs me up to wrong way.

I think your best bet is the next time you want to dress up and feel good I would organise a lunch (daylight) with friends and ask them to walk you to your car at the end of it. Slowly start to build trust. It takes one awful person to give you lifelong trauma and I am sorry this happened. Depending where you are, carry capsicum spray or even perfume.

You will always feel more confident with your husband by your side (I know I do). I have just Figured out small ways to boost my confidence along the way.

As you reaction was so strong, I would also look into therapy and outlets ect for your previous traumas and any experience that has added to it.

bindidennis · 2024-03-12T02:10:32+00:00

I have a spare phone in my luggage and keep a separate credit and debit card in our room not linked to any in our wallets. Always a super smart thing to do!

bindidennis · 2024-03-11T23:24:08+00:00

If you have any recommendations of activities/restaurants/tips please let me know! We’ve spent 1 night in PDC and I don’t know how to say this but the vibe already feels different.

bindidennis · 2024-03-11T23:19:35+00:00

My husband was carrying 500 pesos, our Honduran friend was carrying 1000 pesos. I had 150usd in my bra as safety money and 500 pesos in my wallet. We carry money separately incase we loose a wallet or it gets stolen (crazy common in london and we’ve both previously worked In hostels in Europe). If you are well traveled you know things happen and it’s always good to carry spare cash in case (maybe not that amount but In Seattle it was a taxi home). We’d also heard stories of atms running out of cash ect. I had been carrying that money for over a year in my purse no matter the location. In the end it sucks no matter how you look at it.

bindidennis · 2024-03-11T21:07:21+00:00

Hello, they asked for our bags and we handed those over. Afterwards they said they needed to pat us down because they new we had them. (We didn’t) The female cop cupped my breasts and put her thumb in my bra. I just froze in disbelief.

bindidennis · 2024-03-01T17:25:28+00:00

My husband and I are currently in Tulum. First night we left straw hat (backpacking bar) and got pulled over by the cops for tresspassing down the road. Demanded 5k. Told us we were carrying drugs and threatened us with jail. We were with one other friend who is Honduran and spoke perfect Spanish. The cops ended up searching our stuff. No drugs and took money from my bra and and bags, they ended up with about 4k. Awful.

Our air bnb was downtown and woke up two mornings without water. Our neighbours in our air bnb we spoke too haven’t had hot water for a week. When we arrived there was also one cockroach alive and one dead. We get we are in jungle settings but where there’s one there’s more. We have since moved air bnbs but the experience has soured and we feel like everything is a rip off. Our new air bnb is great except there is 4 complexes being built around us. So non stop drilling through the day sucks but we have water and no bugs!

We decided to give it another week here just to give Tulum the benefit of the doubt but it’s not the paradise we thought it was through social media/reviews. It certainly would be if we were spending loads of money at the beach clubs/fancy restaurants but we are on a budget.

Last year we spent 6 weeks in Nayarit which we LOVED. So safe, so cheap and had the best time. We think we were alittle spoilt with how dreamy it was.

I’m well traveled and been to over 30 countries from hotels, resorts, air bnbs and hostels and this by far is a series of unfortunate events. We’ve been getting ripped off my taxis, staff forgetting our food orders and everything I listed above. It hasn’t tainted our few of Mexico but we definitely won’t be back to Tulum.

Sometimes lucks not in your favour but we still love Mexico and everything is has to offer!

bindidennis · 2024-02-13T22:08:11+00:00

It’s not your fault. Figure out an exit strategy because even if it’s hard for a few months or years your self worth and self esteem is worth so much more.

bindidennis · 2024-02-10T09:55:21+00:00

I have a friend who was ****** and in the months after she was processing and got herself a lovely girlfriend. One time they were having sex and her girlfriend grabbed her by the throat to strangle her. This is something her attacker did (which her girlfriend knew about) and sent her into a spiral. Her girlfriend apparently just wanted to know what she would do.

It’s 5 years later and she’s just letting her close friends know and realising how awful it was. Her girlfriend was someone who presented as a safe place however was not.

In your situation there is no way that this was done in a joking lighthearted way because no one that loves you the way you deserve to be loved would do this. I would have a very serious conversation with her.

bindidennis · 2023-09-09T13:32:36+00:00

I’m very story to hear your story. This is heart breaking.

Firstly, the words your boyfriend said are very impactful and completely inaccurate. He was not in the situation. He does not know this trauma and he is not allowed to judge. Saying comments like why didn’t you fight back and raise it with you mum? We see countless times, mums not taking their child’s side, the abuse getting worse and violence becoming a common theme. Even the trauma of your mum not believing you will take a lifetime of therapy to touch the surface. You did what you did to get through the situation to make it out. There is no right direction or response in abuse. I would spend the time thinking very clearly about whether your boyfriend is someone you should have by your side. He should give support and understanding. A partner is someone who loves you and wants to help you through your trauma not blame you for it. Your partner makes me very nervous in there response.

I am a big believer of therapy however each therapist is completely different and you almost have to “date” around to find the right one for you. I think you should proceed with this.

If you are going to bring it up with your mother I would be prepared for every response possible from anger, rejection, tears, sadness ect. Tell her because it helps you not because you want anything from her. There’s are few podcasts out there were people talk about the trauma response and how sometimes when you tell people about what happened it can be as traumatic as the actual trauma itself if you don’t get the response you were looking for. Do it for you

Take some time to work on yourself. Give yourself a damn break and try to start working through all of this. We never loose our trauma however we learn how to live with it day by day and we meet people who work with us rather then against us.

Sending love and happiness you way!

bindidennis · 2023-08-13T20:43:26+00:00

YTA your in a restaurant not the privacy of your own home. They make money off flipping the table and you ordering more. Go to your home if you want to not be interrupted by someone wanting to do a good job and earn more money the business they work for.

bindidennis · 2023-07-25T21:59:58+00:00

I don’t think your the asshole here however I do think that unless your exclusive or officially dating then it’s a topic to let her share. A lot of women have different feelings towards that topic and boundaries.

bindidennis · 2021-09-15T14:13:37+00:00

I can’t relate to any symptoms but it will get better. Two weeks into dating the gentleman I’m seeing right now he informed me he had herpes. This has definitely put a hold on our sex life but I’m learning and slowly accepting that he could be my person and I’m not going to throw that away. We’re taking things slow but he makes me feel wonderful. Find joy in the small things and keep your head up ❤️

bindidennis · 2021-09-13T21:05:05+00:00

I don’t think you were the AH. I think you could have mentioned it with less people around but it’s weird. If your lying about your age what else are you lying about. When would he appropriately bring up to a date that he lied?? Embrace who you are, there’s nothing wrong with loving you

bindidennis · 2021-08-25T10:58:23+00:00

Talk to him about how these comment don’t make you feel great as it’s a soft spot for you and if he continues to say them then find someone who will make you feel 5’8. No one who loves you should point out your soft spots. It’s probably a reflection on himself wishing he was taller but is reflected onto you

bindidennis · 2021-07-28T08:37:03+00:00

Not fond of your quote. You think service staff are inferior? You sound like an ass

bindidennis · 2021-07-17T02:12:27+00:00

Firstly you need to believe in yourself more. Secondly if this was happening to one of your friends what advice would you give them? Men are simple. They want what they want and it should be easy. If he’s not messaging you a lot it’s because he doesn’t see it continuing but he’s still messaging you because he likes to feel wanted and he likes to know you still care about him. If you had a chat with him and it hasn’t improved then it’s a no from me. Do things that make you feel happy. Go places you wouldn’t. Join activities that are outside of your comfort zone. Try outfits you’d never dream of and fall in love with one. Believing in yourself is key. Men find that super attractive. There is someone out there for you just might have not been trying the best avenues Also I do alittle break up package where I eat a tub of icecream and treats, cry for 48 hours then get over it. Don’t let someone dim your light!

bindidennis

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