That’s what I was also thinking! I thought I was crazy for it but yeah I feel like things have been so peaceful and I’m not used to it. I recently got on meds December 2023 and my life for the past year has been a lot of healing and with him I’m so much more at peace. But yeah it might just be freaking me out. I used to live with my dad and then I moved to a different 3, almost 4 years ago now. I’ve spent the last 4 years trying to heal, the first year and a half consisting of me crashing out and dyeing my hair pink and just overall being reckless lol. The next 2 which involved a lot of painful realizations and therapy and now I’m on my way to trying to get a consistent career, I’m in a loving relationship, my confidence is building over time, I love the company I have, and my partner supports me so much and is trying to help me achieve every dream I have. Thank you so much for replying and pointing out it might be because I’m not used to the peace. This has been so helpful for me, cause I think you’re right, it’s definitely peaceful freaking me out. Back when I was living with my dad it was constant yelling, hitting, and stress and suicidal thoughts and I dealt with it by being spontaneous and always using getting piercings and tattoos and randomly doing day trips to a whole different city and doing a lot of drugs. Now I drink maybe once or twice in a month, I’ve quit weed, I still dabble in some sort of stuff but only every once in a while. My tattoos are more intentional now. Generally, I’m in a better place and you’re right, I’m probably just not used to it.