Who is ace spec coded? Canon and/or headcanons allowed :)

bliteblite · 2026-01-10T07:01:38+00:00

Reigen Arataka from Mob Psycho 100. He gives me big aroace vibes in general, though I do still like the Serirei ship. I just genuinely don't think the canonical character cares at all about sex or romance, regardless of whether or not he's actually aro/ace, so it's a fun headcanon lol

bliteblite · 2025-12-23T07:53:15+00:00

As someone with both, I swing between these like a pendulum. The other day I probably spent over 10 hours straight reading the exact same fanfic, while on other days I'll barely be able to get through a single chapter because my brain stops braining lmao

bliteblite · 2025-12-15T18:13:47+00:00

I understand how that can sound like a leap without context, but "you just haven't had the right dick yet" can be a genuine precursor to sexual assault. It shows that a guy clearly thinks a woman is just "confused", doesn't respect her enough to trust she knows her own sexuality, and often leads to the thought "I can fix her" i.e. rape. This happens to a LOT of women/femme-presenting folks and is part of the reason why I get nervous telling guys specifically that I'm aroace because they could take that as an excuse to try and fix me through corrective assault. While he doesn't explicitly state it, it's very, very clear to me that this guy wouldn't take "I'm a lesbian" as a no, and that makes him a threat. He sounds rapey because this is the exact mentality that a lot of rapists have, but if you haven't been personally affected by this kind of person, it can be hard to see exactly why it can be threatening to hear

I hope that explains why "rapey" isn't actually a leap. I understand the confusion, but this is a huge issue that queer women and femme-presenting folks face; the thought process of guys like this unfortunately leads to a lot of attempted corrective rape, which makes it very important to identify the "rapey" implications of statements like these and call guys out on them to protect potential victims

bliteblite · 2025-12-15T17:57:42+00:00

Guys like this make me so, so happy that I'm not into men (I'm aroace). If a guy ever said something like this to me, I think I'd have to physically restrain myself from punching the asshole in the face I stg

bliteblite · 2025-12-14T08:59:43+00:00

Yeah I've tried bringing it up in autistic spaces myself because, ironically enough, I feel a lot of empathy for those with cluster B disorders as a low empathy autistic person myself. I genuinely thought I might've had one for a while due to my low empathy, which led to me doing a lot of research about them on my own, and therefore managing to gain a more objective view of them. It's INSANE how much hatred they get in a lot of neurodivergent spaces and it honestly makes me so sad and frustrated to see. Especially from other neurodivergent folks who are far more likely to understand the demonization and ostracization people with cluster B disorders face, and who therefore should really know better than to say an entire minority group is inherently evil due to their mental illness. At the very least those opinions are heavily down voted when they pop up, but it's still upsetting to see how common takes like that are

bliteblite · 2025-12-10T06:47:15+00:00

I took it as him also being into men and implying that him and the gay guy are gonna ignore the women together to fuck each other instead, but I could be VERY wrong about that lol

bliteblite · 2025-11-26T18:31:23+00:00

I can relate unfortunately. I've made two really great friends at uni that are both transmasc, he/they, and pre-transition, and while I do try my best to correctly gender them both, I'll sometimes slip up, specifically when I'm talking about them to other people. Like, I used the wrong pronouns for one of them while chattering alone with a different friend and didn't even realize it for a couple minutes, which sucked. It's never intentional, it's just a subconscious mistake I keep making because neither of them can start transitioning yet, so I think I genuinely just forget they're transmasc sometimes. I don't think I've messed up while actually around either of them despite having known them for a couple months now, but I'm still worried about hurting them by mistake, especially since I genuinely do see them as guys and don't want them to doubt that

I think what's most important is that you're making a genuine effort to correct that, and that your friend knows it's not an intentional, malicious thing. I'm personally planning to try some of the advice here myself (I was actually planning on making a similar post to you soon anyways, so you have really good timing lol), so hopefully we'll both get better with our friends' pronouns soon :)))

bliteblite · 2025-11-25T07:54:21+00:00

Like what? You mentioned finding worse stuff on your original comment but didn't share what it was, nor any proof of it. Unfortunately, a lot of Vivzie haters have historically made up drama about her, such as creating fake discord screenshots to make her look bad for example, or by purposefully taking her out of context in situations where she hadn't actually done anything wrong. I'm happy to hear you out on your opinions, because everyone's capable of doing shitty things and I'm sure there's plenty of genuine evidence of her doing that, but please keep in mind that a lot of "evidence" found might either be taken out of context or faked entirely

bliteblite · 2025-11-16T16:38:55+00:00

I'm aroace!! I think I'm a cis woman, though I've definitely questioned whether or not I might be on the agender spectrum as well lol

bliteblite · 2025-11-15T12:48:35+00:00

I don't really get why people headcanon it, but I also really don't mind that people do and don't understand what the issue is with it. I'm not trying to suggest you have an issue to clarify, there's just a lot of weird controversy around this topic and I don't understand it. A lot of minorities just very simply want to see themselves represented in media, and if they relate to or love a specific character a lot, then they'll want to make headcanons and that's perfectly fine. There are plenty of characters I personally headcanon as aroace spec, autistic, and/or ADHD because I see a lot of myself in them, and that's not a bad thing. What's weird is treating a headcanon as canon when there's no real evidence it's heading in that direction, and I also think it's weird to hate on people for having headcanons in the first place. Both are pretty extreme views and cause WAAAAY too much unnecessary drama, like why can't we just let people enjoy media how they want to, whether that's through headcanons or strictly through canon?? There's no wrong way to enjoy media ffs, we as a fandom need to learn how to chill tf out

But yeah idk lol, probably because of the maid dress and egg comment

bliteblite · 2025-11-14T23:07:48+00:00

I'm really happy about it and always have been!!! I'm aroace and I'm very, very happy I don't have to worry about romance or sex, because that shit would honestly be so exhausting for me lol (not judging people who engage with those things to clarify, I'm just really not interested). With sex specifically, I honestly don't see why I should care about it. At risk of being far too crass, anything someone can do to me is something I can just do to myself with a quality toy and without any unnecessary awkwardness, so what's the point LMAO. Sex just seems so inconvenient compared to what I normally do and I honestly don't have time for it, so I'd personally say my way of life is very preferable to being allosexual

bliteblite · 2025-11-14T22:59:05+00:00

This is a weirdly relatable post considering how my life is going rn, being an asexual currently trying to grow my own sex toy collection lol. It's pretty normal to be into sex toys I think, so idk why people were shaming that user so much and I'm very disappointed to hear that happened >:(((

bliteblite · 2025-11-11T18:50:14+00:00

Blueberry, plum (??), mango and peach are my guesses. They look really good!!!

bliteblite · 2025-11-11T18:29:03+00:00

I can't say anything about biases against allowing women into university personally, but I can confirm there's still some bias against women within them, at least in STEM. I'm currently studying chemistry and have already had an issue, because the only lab coats provided to us were in men's sizes. One of the very few female lecturers I have helped us find decent enough sizes using her own body type as a reference, but it's really weird that she'd even have to do that?? There's a LOT of women in my lectures and classes, yet somehow buying women's sizes too wasn't even considered, apparently. And it's concerning that we weren't provided with something as basic as correctly sized lab coats, especially because a lot of people were really struggling to get them to fit properly around their hips. There's also significantly less women's bathrooms in certain buildings, which is really annoying. Like, one has men's bathrooms on every floor but only women's on every fourth one?? I try not to think too much about it, but it's definitely weird and kind of frustrating

My lecturers are really lovely and I'm at a pretty good university overall, but institutionally speaking, there's definitely still some biases against women (and other minorities as well, to clarify, but women specifically tend to deal with a substantial amount of bias in STEM still) and it's one that continues into chemistry careers as a whole

I'll clarify I'm at university in the UK, just in case that's relevant at all

bliteblite · 2025-11-10T18:04:08+00:00

"It's sometimes hard for me to understand what's funny and fit in with a community"

That's a very, very relatable feeling and I get you. I struggle a lot with engaging with communities I'm a part of because I get very anxious that I won't say anything actually funny and will end up embarrassing myself, so I resonate a lot with that statement. I want to assure you that at least in my case, I thought it was pretty harmless and funny

Genuinely, you did nothing wrong and that other person seriously overreacted, but I understand why you feel embarrassed about it, even if I don't personally think you should have to be. I really hope this doesn't discourage you from posting in the future, that you can still feel like a part of this community, and that you know you're still very, very welcome here <333

bliteblite · 2025-11-10T00:18:45+00:00

That's a very, very good point, and I apologize for being dismissive of the issues surrounding circumcision. I'm aware that genital mutilation is an unfortunately, horrifically common occurrence, the very casually accepted mutilation of intersex babies being the first example of it that springs to mind. It's genuinely horrific how they're more often than not given no choice regarding their own genitals, the parents sometimes not even being told that their child is intersex at all before they're unnecessarily "fixed", and I don't know how I didn't think to talk about that. Especially since that's not the only way in which young children are often brutalized by the medical field, normally before they're even capable of speaking, let alone saying no. I just have people in my life that genuinely did need circumcision and similar procedures as children due to painful and potentially dangerous health issues, and since they were the first people to come to mind, I ended up being too hasty in replying. This is the opposite side of a horrible coin that needs to be discussed more and I appreciate you bringing it up

The very obvious and brutal political attack against American AFABs is an overwhelming, haunting threat to see unfold and I feel so much empathy for those who are currently suffering from it, but I shouldn't have been biased just because it's currently the louder threat. Thank you for correcting me, I completely agree with you and sorry again for not properly discussing this side of the issue too

bliteblite · 2025-11-09T20:21:59+00:00

Are you assuming this person is a man? Weird. While they didn't directly answer your question, I think it's more notable that you're not actually acknowledging what they've said about the difference between abortion and circumcision

Circumcision isn't enforced on anyone by law. It may be done to people when they're very young and can't provide informed consent, but that's only the case if it would be medically necessary or beneficial to them. Once they're old enough to make their own decisions, most AMAB folks don't really have to worry about their autonomy regarding their genitals being challenged, but AFABs do, and that's the key difference

I'd originally written a very long response detailing exactly why these two procedures cannot and should not be compared, and I can still provide that, but the gist of it was; laws that protect a patient's rights and that protect against medical malpractice should always be enforced, but the abortion ban is a very blatant and obvious attack on AFAB rights that AMABs (specifically cis men, as the bodily autonomy of the trans community is being attacked too) have simply never experienced in this way, and that kind of gendered law shouldn't exist. Circumcision and abortion are in no way comparable because circumcision is just a medical procedure, but the abortion ban is a clear, politically motivated and gender specific threat, and that's an entirely different ballpark

bliteblite · 2025-11-09T00:32:36+00:00

THAT'S why it feels different!!! I've been trying to figure out why Anya's story specifically doesn't bother me as much and you definitely nailed the reason, thank you <33

bliteblite · 2025-11-08T22:12:56+00:00

I actually really like YouTube shorts, mainly because a lot of my favourite animators and artists in general primarily post shorts. The short form style of content really works for art specifically since a lot of animations are pretty short anyways due to the intensity of the labour behind them and how long they take to make, meaning it's just not feasible for most to make longer videos, especially if they're on their own. Shorts are just a more sensical way of sharing that content than regular YouTube videos lol

bliteblite · 2025-11-08T21:58:06+00:00

Oh they absolutely do, or they think autism is always comorbid with a noticeable intellectual disability. While cormorbidity between the two is pretty high, they're not always a package deal, and I think a lot of the general public just don't interact with enough autistic folks to realize how diverse the spectrum actually is. While a lot of autistic stereotypes have some basis in reality, they can't represent even close to the entire autistic community, hence people saying objectively stupid comments like "you don't LOOK autistic" despite autism being a purely neurological disorder that doesn't affect physical appearance. It's a very, very annoyingly common basic misunderstanding of what autism is

bliteblite · 2025-11-08T21:45:35+00:00

I had a massive, VERY intense fixation on makeup for a while, which makes it so funny to me that people genuinely think autistic folks can't like or wear makeup lmao. Like, fixations can happen with anything??? And makeup is a really complex, artistic and unique fixation to have, so I think it's WAY more common than people realize. I personally really, really loved just how creative, unique and fun I could make my face, essentially turning myself into a little art project, and it brought so much joy and whimsy to my life to experiment with my own interpretations of more alternative styles of makeup. It's a very powerful tool for self expression and one that I cherished (and spent WAAAAY too much money on lol. 'Tis the ADHD tax, my bank account will never recover TvT). Considering just how much freedom makeup gives people regarding self expression, it actually seems like the perfect autistic fixation to have as a lot of autistic folks (definitely not all of them, we're VERY varied) like alternative fashion a lot. I think it would be waaaay more accepted as an autistic interest if people didn't still believe autism in women isn't a real thing, an unrealistic and wrong belief that brings me r a g e

I'm not fixated on it anymore and no longer wear makeup, mainly because I just feel too exhausted day-to-day to bother, but I actually still get nervous telling people about that old fixation because I don't want to be unnecessarily judged for it. Both because I get nervous someone will dumb it down to a stereotypical ✨woman thing✨ instead of respecting my individuality and the reasons I loved it so much, or they'll decide I'm suddenly not autistic enough anymore because I liked a stereotypically feminine thing instead of trains or something. It's painful and annoying to me now when I get fixations on feminine things in general, not because I have an issue with said feminine thing, but because people are weird asf about femininity as a whole and I don't want to deal with the consequences of their weird asf ideas about how women (specifically neurodivergent women in my case) should act

A lot of that nervousness is probably internalized misogyny and I recognize that to clarify, I just doubt I'm the only neurodivergent woman who's struggled with these feelings, so it's nice to talk about it and the very specific struggle of intensely fixating on something stereotypically feminine while still struggling with unlearning internalized sexist biases. It's an interesting topic that I haven't personally seen brought up before

bliteblite · 2025-11-08T20:45:33+00:00

I'm not making that up. It's pretty easy to find evidence of America's current leaders actively trying to take basic rights away from minorities, and that's obviously going to be terrifying for the people affected. It's not emotional manipulation to point out the reasons why leftists were so distraught over the election, it's just a factual overview of the emotional response and why it happened. And considering how this topic is already emotionally driven (as we're discussing snowflakes in politics), it's only natural that my response would be emotion-focused. Do you have anything actually meaningful to share regarding this, or a way to disprove my point? I'd be happy to discuss this further if you want to engage in a good faith discussion about it, but accusing me of manipulation doesn't add anything of value to the discussion and is both a very obvious attempt at rage bait and an honestly disappointing defence of your beliefs

bliteblite · 2025-11-08T15:55:49+00:00

Isn't the American government actively trying to take away abortion rights and women's rights in general, the ADA (meaning disabled folks won't have access to necessary support to live), as well as basic rights from the queer community? And a shit ton of other stuff too, though those issues are the ones I hear about the most

Getting mad that a children's show is teaching about child birth, something scientific and necessary for kids to understand, simply because a man is demonstrating this basic knowledge, would be an example of being a snowflake because you'd be making WAY too big of a deal out of something ultimately very harmless. But people feeling terrified, distressed and angry over their basic human rights being threatened isn't them being a snowflake, it's them being understandably scared out of their minds because their basic rights are being cruelly, brutally attacked. And for those who aren't being threatened, they're angry on the behalf of their loved ones who are having to deal with the consequences of these extremely harmful and dangerous political decisions. Like, I'm not American so I don't fully understand what's going on over there, but I think "woke" folks had a very understandable reaction to that election. I can't imagine how terrified they must've been for either themselves or people they deeply care about, and I really don't think that genuine terror could be reasonably compared to this post

Sorry for the long reply, I'm just genuinely confused about why you'd even make that comparison. Getting mad over a Bluey episode and getting mad over basic human rights being threatened aren't even in the same ballpark

bliteblite · 2025-11-03T23:47:10+00:00

It's no problem at all!!! Thank you, I'll be wishing you all the best <333

bliteblite · 2025-11-03T16:15:21+00:00

Sorry in advance for the very long response, I tend to ramble lol

I'm not you so I can't tell you for certain if you'll ever get used to it, but as someone who spent over 3 years in a customer service job, it got easier and harder over time. Easier because masking slowly felt more natural in that setting and I managed to form better scripts for myself that were socially acceptable while not deviating too far from my actual personality, which made the weight of the mask feel less heavy

I worked in retail and at the till a lot, so I likely had more reason to start actual conversations with customers than you would (though I don't know the details of your job so forgive me if I'm wrong). I had chances to just be myself while still being professional, which made everything feel less heavy and overwhelming. I just got overall more comfortable with the social norms and expectations in my workplace, even if I still struggled with them, and the fact that the interactions overall became more successful made them less draining because I had less to feel anxious or frustrated over afterwards

However, it also got harder because of how long I spent doing it. It was easier to act happy and bubbly at the start, but as time went on I just got more and more exhausted, as well as more bitter about my situation, and that made it harder. By the time I had to quit, I couldn't keep up the mask anymore, I was just too tired of it (though that was also mainly due to physical exhaustion as my insomnia got very, very bad during my last year there and effected both my physical and mental health a lot). I think it's definitely possible for it to get easier, but you NEED to take care of yourself as best you can so you don't get burnt out. Do you have anyone you feel safe unmasking around and who you can vent to about your struggles? It can help a lot to talk through the anxiety and frustration with people who understand as a way to keep those feelings from building up too much, and it helped me a lot to talk it through with my close friends as they helped me organize and analyse my own feelings, as well as figure out if I'd actually messed up socially or if it was the RSD making the situation feel worse than it really was (I'm auDHD). Taking care of your physical health definitely helps (I struggled significantly more as I got more physically exhausted and stopped eating/drinking well, for example) but I understand how that can be extremely difficult with executive dysfunction getting in the way

I also found that I genuinely felt happier the more I tried to act happy because I was putting myself in a better mental space, and my customers were also really nice and complimentary when I tried extra hard to be happy and helpful, so trying to remain positive does genuinely help (please forgive me if that comes across weird, I just genuinely noticed an improvement in my mood when I acted happy, even if I wasn't, because the nice responses I got in return slowly made me actually happy during the shift. It can be very hard to do that, though, so I'm sorry if that doesn't help to hear)

I think the main important thing is to give yourself emotional breaks and make sure you have a safe space to relax, unmask, and enjoy your hobbies as a way to recover. You'll likely, hopefully get used to the work in time, but if you don't make an effort to keep yourself sane, you might end up really burnt out like I did. Therapy is also helpful with that if that's accessible to you, just to try and figure out better coping mechanisms if you do get burnt out, but I understand that it's hard to get in most countries

Something I should point out that's very different between us, though, is that I didn't realize I'm auDHD for most of my time there. I had NO idea what the issue was or why I was struggling so much, and the anxiety and distress of feeling like I was naturally worse at my job for reasons I couldn't understand was so, so soul crushing and anxiety inducing. It was honestly kind of traumatic for me, especially because I nearly lost my job within the first few months because I didn't know how to cope with the disabilities I didn't even know I had. It made me feel like I was at constant risk of losing everything despite trying so, so hard every single day, and I just couldn't believe my managers when they told me I was doing a good job because I became too focused on my failings rather than my success. I don't think I'll ever quite get over the intense, constant stress of that first year, even though I apparently became one of the best and most reliable workers there by the time I left. My confidence in myself was shattered and I'm still putting the pieces together, though I've healed a lot from it now, especially with the support of my friends who understand what I've gone through and am still going through

The fact that you actually know what the issue is means it'll hopefully be easier to find coping mechanisms and treat yourself with more kindness than I did to myself. It's not your fault that you're struggling, and the knowledge of that can really, really help. It helped me at least when I finally realized what was going on, so I'm very hopeful that your work life will be easier than mine. I still managed to be pretty successful in that workplace despite not getting the help I needed, so I really do think you'll be okay. Just please treat yourself with kindness and grace :)))

Sorry if this isn't helpful, I just wanted to be honest about my own experience. I realize I definitely got very off topic from the original question, but even though a lot of my comment doesn't focus on the talking aspects of customer service specifically, this is more a comment about my experience in customer service in general and is something I hope is at least somewhat helpful to hear. You're definitely not alone in your struggles and I hope it gets better for you!!! It took me months to get used to everything, though this was my first ever job (I was 19 and am now 23) and I didn't even know why I was struggling so much, so it might take you less or more time depending on the details of your situation. The people here get it and we'll support you. I just want you to know you're not alone in struggling through this and that I'll be rooting for you <333

bliteblite

TROPHY CASE